Fancy Ben, The World's Last Nuke
Ol' Fancy Ben,Fancy Ben is the last known nuclear bomb left in the world since the fall of all nations. For a long time, it looked pretty likely that Earth would nuke itself into oblivion, and that didn't look any less likely when the world went straight to corporate-run hell. But once the Megacorps decided that the weapons were a threat to shareholders and an unacceptable risk to future financial quarters, that was that. No matter how many fell into nefarious hands or rotted away in abandoned silos, Megacorp kill-teams had a can-do-attitude and blatant disregard for human rights that got the job done. Thousands of nukes were decommissioned and turned into commemorative trinkets over a decade-long purge. Except for Fancy Ben. Somehow, Ben avoided destruction and has spent the time since changing hands, from corporations to terrorists to cultists, each one fighting and killing to get a hold of ol' Ben. No one's really sure what to do with him, other than keeping him out of the hands of those other jerks. Ben's the last of his kind, and some think it's just right that he gets to go out in style.
Last of his kind,
They went quiet,
But he'll go loud.
It's not the size that counts,Fancy Ben is believed to be a Mark VI, made-in-America nuclear bomb, over three tons in weight, and enough juice to wipe out an entire section of the Megacity. Originally described as having suffered superficial damage when struck by gunfire and explosives in what was likely an exhilarating moment for everyone around, Fancy Ben has since been rendered unrecognizable.
But the fuse to the fission.
Living up to his name, Fancy Ben has been painted, re-painted, decorated with beads and golds, precious gems hammered into the case, and cupholders for beer welded onto the side. The last known photograph of Fancy Ben was initially believed to be a particularly gaudy piece of modern art. Every new owner has added their touch to the bomb's casing in what almost seems like a compulsion. Some estimate that Ben's weight has nearly doubled by now, overburdened by the gilded alterations. There's probably a metaphor in that, somewhere.
Some think all the tinkering has rendered Ben permanently inoperable, but no one is willing to take the chance.