too thick to fail by Millimax | World Anvil

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Bearsday, 22 Frosting 999 Y.K.

too thick to fail

by Millimax

 shortly after i woke up this morning i heard a very large voice right outside the inn boom "i heard there were ponies in town!"
 that's how my day started
 portmaster "gorodan ashlord" is a fire giant as tall as 6 ponies and he effectively runs the city of vralkek by means of a combination of greed and brute force and minimal impulse control
 i saw him tear a chunk off of a house and hurl it to sink a random boat ... for entertainment? to impress me?
 i do not like him
 
 during the war he and hellebore were in the same unit and he's a big fan of how she "liked to get her hooves dirty"
 he bragged about seeing her grow a bramble right beneath someone which sliced them into ... "slaw"
 i can't tell how much of what he says is exaggeration but there's no doubt that they were murder buddies
 and since i'm related to her he thinks i'm just the greatest and so are my friends
 he believes me to be of the same gleefully violent nature
 i am not.
 
 when i seemed unhappy about the boat thing he tried to cheer me up by ordering some random strangers on the street to start singing a song he learned from hellebore called "one bad seed"
 it's a parable about a young bully but he misunderstands it as being about him and somehow a good thing?
 i've only tolerated him because telling him what i really feel would probably enrage him and after seeing how much damage he does casually i don't want to see him with fell purpose
 
 he learned all about hospitality from my great-grand-aunt so he's offered for us to stay in his guest house
 i'd rather be galloping in any other direction but here we are
 he wants us to join him for dinner tonight and the only way i can think of to buffer myself emotionally for the experience is an enormous bowl of glitterreed but i want to be clear-headed in case he gets angry and i have to defend myself
 hey gorodan you massive turd
 it's only hospitality if i feel safe
 
 gemini star suggested we murder him in his sleep
 i said that as guests in his home we couldn't attack him
 she argued that his boast about killing a dozen town guards who came to ask him to leave is a pretty clear sign the city considers him a bad guest and it isn't legitimately his home and something has to be done
 we've settled on poisoning his food to keep him asleep long enough to give the town baliff a chance to put a mark of banishing on him
 what a relief

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  1. look how organized i am also i got knifed today
    Griffinsday, 13 Seeding 998 Y.K.
  2. can't get their face out of my mind
    Griffinsday, 13 Seeding 998 Y.K.
  3. the days are way longer in khorvaire
    Wolfsday, 14 Seeding 998 Y.K.
  4. good medicine
    Wolfsday, 14 Seeding 998 Y.K.
  5. writing this down so i can get some sleep
    Wolfsday, 14 Seeding 998 Y.K.
  6. good morning
    Flamesday, 15 Seeding 998 Y.K.
  7. this motley group
    Flamesday, 15 Seeding 998 Y.K.
  8. errand day one
    Flamesday, 15 Seeding 998 Y.K.
  9. sleep and the self-made pony
    Bearsday, 16 Seeding 998 Y.K.
  10. errand day two
    Bearsday, 16 Seeding 998 Y.K.
  11. gryphon appreciation day
    Bearsday, 16 Seeding 998 Y.K.
  12. wait what now
    Bearsday, 16 Seeding 998 Y.K.
  13. that campus map
    Bearsday, 16 Seeding 998 Y.K.
  14. they love to overdo everything here
    Bearsday, 16 Seeding 998 Y.K.
  15. qualms
    Crownsday, 17 Seeding 998 Y.K.
  16. message in a dream
    Thronesday, 18 Seeding 998 Y.K.
  17. and points north
    Wolfsday, 20 Seeding 998 Y.K.
  18. breland blue
    Wolfsday, 20 Seeding 998 Y.K.
  19. a modest prophecy
    Wolfsday, 20 Seeding 998 Y.K.
  20. stabbed in the neck by a sunbeam
    Flamesday, 21 Seeding 998 Y.K.
  21. gifts for all
    Bearsday, 22 Seeding 998 Y.K.
  22. zone of twilight
    Crownsday, 23 Seeding, 998 Y.K.
  23. everything and lots of it
    Crownsday, 23 Seeding, 998 Y.K.
  24. counting from zero
    Thronesday, 24 Seeding 998 Y.K.
  25. returns and investments
    Thronesday, 30 Seeding 998 Y.K.
  26. found in translation
    Crownsday, 7 Blooming 998 Y.K.
  27. going with the flow
    Thronesday, 12 Blooming, 998 Y.K.
  28. rescue arrangers
    Thronesday, 12 Blooming, 998 Y.K.
  29. calm but collected
    Griffinsday, 13 Blooming 998 Y.K.
  30. twisting passages
    Wolfsday, 14 Blooming 998 Y.K.
  31. he did it wrong
    Wolfsday, 14 Blooming 998 Y.K.
  32. what works and what doesn't
    Flamesday, 15 Blooming 998 Y.K.
  33. cazha bloodwing only knows one game
    Bearsday, 16 Blooming 998 Y.K.
  34. . . .
    Bearsday, 16 Blooming 998 Y.K.
  35. gravity
    Crownsday, 17 Blooming 998 Y.K.
  36. mistaken
    Wolfsday, 20 Blooming 998 Y.K.
  37. today's the day
    Bearsday, 28 Blooming 998 Y.K.
  38. it worked it worked it worked!
    Bearsday, 28 Blooming 998 Y.K.
  39. so i chatted with another goddess
    Bearsday, 28 Blooming 998 Y.K.
  40. i'm sitting as fast as i can
    Griffinsday, 1 Sunfall 998 Y.K.
  41. strange day so far
    Wolfsday, 2 Sunfall 998 Y.K.
  42. startling eve
    Wolfsday, 2 Sunfall 998 Y.K.
  43. i hope there's coffee because i sure could do with some
    Flamesday, 3 Sunfall 998 Y.K.
  44. hard work's reward is more work
    Flamesday, 3 Sunfall 998 Y.K.
  45. those who can't do ... steal
    Bearsday, 4 Sunfall 998 Y.K.
  46. d'cannith jorlanna throws lousy parties
    Bearsday, 4 Sunfall 998 Y.K.
  47. motivations redoubled
    Crownsday, 5 Sunfall 998 Y.K.
  48. i learned this from bipeds
    Thronesday, 6 Sunfall 998 Y.K.
  49. into the arcane congress
    Thronesday, 6 Sunfall 998 Y.K.
  50. oh and there's a killer on the loose
    Griffinsday, 7 Sunfall 998 Y.K.
  51. up all night to get published
    Bearsday, 10 Sunfall 998 Y.K.
  52. the thanks i get
    Bearsday, 10 Sunfall 998 Y.K.
  53. order of operations
    Bearsday, 10 Sunfall 998 Y.K.
  54. technically not the worst day of my life
    Bearsday, 10 Sunfall 998 Y.K.
  55. fighting our fears
    Crownsday, 11 Sunfall 998 Y.K.
  56. i don't like surprises
    Crownsday, 11 Sunfall 998 Y.K.
  57. unsettled
    Crownsday, 11 Sunfall 998 Y.K.
  58. more unsettled
    Griffinsday, 13 Sunfall 998 Y.K.
  59. happy gryphon's day
    Griffinsday, 13 Sunfall 998 Y.K.
  60. burning issues
    Bearsday, 16 Sunfall 998 Y.K.
  61. it's been a week already?
    Bearsday, 16 Sunfall 998 Y.K.
  62. awkward in aundair
    Crownsday, 17 Sunfall 998 Y.K.
  63. lab results
    Crownsday, 17 Sunfall 998 Y.K.
  64. hard fighting's reward is more fighting
    Crownsday, 17 Sunfall 998 Y.K.
  65. forbidden tome
    Thronesday, 18 Sunfall 998 Y.K.
  66. heart of flame
    Thronesday, 18 Sunfall 998 Y.K.
  67. jorlanna's burden
    Wolfsday, 20 Sunfall 998 Y.K.
  68. long distance
    Bearsday, 22 Sunfall 998 Y.K.
  69. this week's summery
    Crownsday, 29 Sunfall 998 Y.K.
  70. i'm just a little hoarse
    Griffinsday, 1 Offering 999 Y.K.
  71. outside influence
    Griffinsday, 7 Offering 999 Y.K.
  72. hoofprints
    Flamesday, 9 Offering 999 Y.K.
  73. when it rains it pours
    Bearsday, 10 Offering 999 Y.K.
  74. what did we learn today?
    Crownsday, 11 Offering 999 Y.K.
  75. impressions
    Griffinsday, 13 Offering 999
  76. chilling effect
    Wolfsday, 14 Offering 999 Y.K.
  77. forming a queue
    Flamesday, 15 Offering 999 Y.K.
  78. helpful friends
    Thronesday, 18 Offering 999 Y.K.
  79. being heard
    Thronesday, 18 Offering 999 Y.K.
  80. inside influence
    Wolfsday, 20 Offering 999 Y.K.
  81. this shopping list confuses me
    Bearsday, 22 Offering 999 Y.K.
  82. senseless
    Thronesday, 24 Offering 999 Y.K.
  83. contrast and compare
    Thronesday, 24 Offering 999 Y.K.
  84. digging for rocks
    Wolfsday, 26 Offering 999 Y.K.
  85. well defended
    Flamesday, 28 Offering 999 Y.K.
  86. misrepresentation
    Thronesday, 30 Offering 999 Y.K.
  87. taking it back
    Griffinsday, 1 Reaping 999 Y.K.
  88. facing responsibility
    Wolfsday, 2 Reaping 999 Y.K.
  89. abundance of caution
    Crownsday, 5 Reaping 999 Y.K.
  90. stress tests
    Thronesday, 6 Reaping 999 Y.K.
  91. sykes is making a huge mistake
    Griffinsday, 7 Reaping 999 Y.K.
  92. the difference between silence and quiet
    Flamesday, 9 Reaping 999 Y.K.
  93. noise
    Bearsday, 10 Reaping 999 Y.K.
  94. always use protection
    Thronesday, 12 Reaping 999 Y.K.
  95. into so many pieces
    Griffinsday, 13 Reaping 999 Y.K.
  96. control
    Griffinsday, 13 Reaping 999 Y.K.
  97. composure regained
    Bearsday, 16 Reaping 999 Y.K.
  98. pressure and heat
    Crownsday, 23 Reaping 999 Y.K.
  99. the king is dead
    Thronesday, 24 Reaping 999 Y.K.
  100. all kinds of progress
    Bearsday, 10 Leaffall 999 Y.K.
  101. howling intensifies
    Bearsday, 10 Leaffall 999 Y.K.
  102. don't call it a setback
    Crownsday, 11 Leaffall 999 Y.K.
  103. land of the dead
    Flamesday, 15 Leaffall 999 Y.K.
  104. getting on well with the locals
    Crownsday, 17 Leaffall 999 Y.K.
  105. just passing through
    Griffinsday, 19 Leaffall 999 Y.K.
  106. that's enough i get it stop with the wolves already
    Flamesday, 21 Leaffall 999 Y.K.
  107. gathering
    Bearsday, 22 Leaffall 999 Y.K.
  108. flavors of karrnath
    Crownsday, 23 Leaffall 999 Y.K.
  109. surprises
    Thronesday, 24 Leaffall 999 Y.K.
  110. creatures and comforts
    Thronesday, 24 Leaffall 999 Y.K.
  111. moving pieces
    Thronesday, 30 Leaffall 999 Y.K.
  112. improvisation
    Griffinsday, 1 Sowing 999 Y.K.
  113. old
    Wolfsday, 2 Sowing 999 Y.K.
  114. bite the sky
    Crownsday, 5 Sowing 999 Y.K.
  115. class roster
    Crownsday, 11 Sowing 999 Y.K.
  116. our visit to fort deepdark
    Griffinsday, 13 Sowing 999 Y.K.
  117. purple waves of grain
    Flamesday, 15 Sowing 999 Y.K
  118. rest
    Crownsday, 17 Sowing 999 Y.K.
  119. the mournland is unpleasant and i'm glad we'll be visiting again
    Thronesday, 18 Sowing 999 Y.K.
  120. d'cannith zorlan makes lousy decisions
    Thronesday, 18 Sowing 999 Y.K.
  121. cold comfort
    Bearsday, 22 Sowing 999 Y.K.
  122. reaching out
    Crownsday, 23 Sowing 999 Y.K.
  123. larger than we appear
    Flamesday, 27 Sowing 999 Y.K.
  124. user serviceable
    Flamesday, 27 Sowing 999 Y.K.
  125. completion's sake
    Bearsday, 28 Sowing 999 Y.K.
  126. flavors of zilargo
    Thronesday, 30 Sowing 999 Y.K.
  127. so glad he doesn't snore
    Griffinsday, 1 Marking 999 Y.K.
  128. closing the distance
    Crownsday, 5 Marking 999 Y.K.
  129. butting heads
    Flamesday, 9 Marking 999 Y.K.
  130. the goats loved it
    Flamesday, 9 Marking 999 Y.K.
  131. marks
    Wolfsday, 14 Marking 999 Y.K.
  132. safety in numbers
    Bearsday, 16 Marking 999 Y.K.
  133. seen
    Crownsday, 17 Marking 999 Y.K.
  134. gut wrenching
    Crownsday, 17 Marking 999 Y.K.
  135. it's still grey
    Griffinsday, 25 Marking 999 Y.K.
  136. warped
    Flamesday, 27 Marking 999 Y.K.
  137. exposed
    Thronesday, 30 Marking 999 Y.K.
  138. company town
    Thronesday, 30 Marking 999 Y.K.
  139. grace notes
    Griffinsday, 1 Snowfall 999 Y.K.
  140. disconnected
    Wolfsday, 2 Snowfall 999 Y.K.
  141. why won't this place just let us do our thing and leave
    Flamesday, 3 Snowfall 999 Y.K.
  142. adding lightness
    Crownsday, 5 Snowfall 999 Y.K.
  143. terms and conditions
    Flamesday, 21 Snowfall 999 Y.K.
  144. something unexpected
    Thronesday, 24 Snowfall 999 Y.K.
  145. four legs good
    Thronesday, 30 Snowfall 999 Y.K.
  146. ander reed knows how to have a good time
    Highnight, 999 Y.K.
  147. dreams coming true
    Bearsday, 4 Frosting 999 Y.K.
  148. dreams uncaught
    Crownsday, 5 Frosting 999 Y.K.
  149. scattered light
    Crownsday, 6 Frosting 999 Y.K.
  150. travel plans
    Griffinsday, 7 Frosting 999 Y.K.
  151. this motley crew
    Flamesday, 9 Frosting 999 Y.K.
  152. sea feast
    Griffinsday, 13 Frosting 999 Y.K.
  153. wrecked
    Bearsday, 16 Frosting 999 Y.K.
  154. digging deeper
    Griffinsday, 19 Frosting 999 Y.K.
  155. family legacy
    Flamesday, 21 Frosting 999 Y.K.
  156. too thick to fail
    Bearsday, 22 Frosting 999 Y.K.
  157. loud and clear
    Bearsday, 22 Frosting 999 Y.K.
  158. paint what you know
    Griffinsday, 25 Frosting 999 Y.K.
  159. she really left her hoofprints all over
    Crownsday, 29 Frosting 999 Y.K.

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by 3 Armored Kittens · Prodromos v.1.1 - World Anvil 0.9.15.009 © 2017-2024 [en] | Anvil Time: 20:48, Apr 28 2024