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(a.k.a. Miss Toaster)

Fire powers are pretty sick until they result in your becoming property of a space circus that doubles as a mobile freaky brothel.

Divine Domains

That was never really figured out.

Holy Books & Codes

The Words of Blades

Divine Symbols & Sigils

A flaming sword

Tenets of Faith

She isn't really divine but the Church of Blades thinks so: "thou must season thy chicken, for the Lord rewards thee with the fact that it tastes better when you do."


Flambo Day, which is every 11/7/X. She got to name the day after looking through some of the CHG's ancient archives and both finding and binging the entirety of a certain show containing 2 words, the first of which begins with a and ends in e and the second of which starts with t and ends in e but which can't be mentioned because it turns out that Disney is getting too much credit for its copyright madness because Cartoon Network likes to flex its legal muscles quite a bit too.

Divine Goals & Aspirations

To live luxuriously so long as she keeps pumping out those inspirational speeches that are written for her by other people.

Physical Description

General Physical Condition

Underweight due to underfeeding by JollyWigs Circus, especially when combined with the calorie-burning fire powers. Fun fact: she would've ended up being taller as an adult if she'd been fed properly. Rarely ill as her body temperatures can reach high extremes without it harming her (thus killing pretty much any invasive pathogen). Has a weakened sense of feeling at the points where shock devices were attached to her for worrying reasons. Often has itchy armpits due to the scars there itching up.

Fairly strong for her size and very flexible. Basically a gymnast/parkour artist when it comes to physical ability.

Facial Features

Relatively long but thin nose, much paleness, much freckle, slightly large eyes, naturally had a slight uni-brow but JollyWigs had the uni bit permanently removed with lasers, has a red diamond (cheap in future) front tooth due to an occasion where she was punched really hard by a staff member, has a barcode tattooed onto front of her neck (ok technically not facial but still something you see when facing her), has a scar going across beneath her left eye that gets extra messy at her nose due to an occasion where another slave slashed her with their claws.

Identifying Characteristics

So pale she almost glows. That barcode tattoo. The fact that she often exercises those fire-freckles to stop the pressure build-up of both oxygen and hydrocarbons from getting dangerous. The scar under her eye.

Physical quirks

Left-handed, always chews with right side of her mouth (as left molars are chipped from her receiving a Detroit Smash from another slave for contesting the theft of her rations), left eye cringes a lot more than right eye in cringy situations, you know that thing of making your lip go inside your mouth when you lick it? Yeah that. Will sometimes itch armpits by rubbing upper arm against her side rather than putting her hand in there.

Special abilities

Her skin is completely heat-proof, with most of the heat that would otherwise leave her body through skin going into her stored oxygen and hydrocarbons in her freckles and the rest making her breath very hot.

Apparel & Accessories

Has all sorts of costumes that the circus had her wear for performances and white clothing for use outside of performances. Loves swirly/curvy patterns and symbols and decorates much of her stuff with them.

Specialized Equipment

Bro, like, imagine if she could wear armour that would allow her to concentrate her fire, add to the storage capacity of hydrocarbons and oxygen and was made to withstand massive temperatures?

Mental characteristics

Personal history

Too long, didn't read: CHG scientist makes her as part of project for weaponless primitive-conquering soldiers but smells money and sells her and the other survivors, she gets picked up by JollyWigs Circus at 7 and a year's training in her abilities despite nobody actually knowing how they worked, used as entertainment with transparent shock stickers, forced to wear heavier shock stuff when not performing, social life sucks due to death and assholery, they try to sexualise her at 14 cos sex sells even tho she hasn't even begun puberty and even if she had she's 14 wtf, she makes several escape attempts, one of them has her hide in a bin and find a VR headset before returning without anyone knowing due to a lack of means of escape, gets elected by slave friends to try the helmet, gets to be a hostage in the Great Terrorist War.

So, the CHG had a slight pickle when some a primitive intelligent species that formed during the terraforming process actually managed to fight off a CHG attempt at conquering them and then adapted to all the new technology they got to become far more difficult for the CHG to deal with later (with these aliens, after much arguing over terms and conditions, getting far better terms of vassalisation than any other species under CHG control). The clear problem was having to use technology that the species was able to steal, copy and use for itself - so why not make yourself some soldiers that don't even need technology to conquer a planet of primitive intelligent beings?

And so we get a string of experiments to make utterly deadly human weapons. Among these was the considered-a-failure L4T-E project, which created individuals like Cally. Out of 1008 babies both created and kidnapped for the project, Cally and 2 others were the only survivors. Of these three, only 2 actually exhibited any fire abilities - with the one other than Cally having far stronger air-heating (bruh 'tis fire) abilities but a much lower heat tolerance (as annoying of a combination as that is). The third one was basically a fire-proof deformed mess who could barely function as a human even after receiving some cybernetic implants and ultimately died at the age of 17 because of them growing out of their implants.

The researcher running the L4T-E project, however, could smell the potential money from 12 miles away and proceeded to pretend that none of them had survived and then sold the 3 survivors - none of them more than 4 years old - on the illegal GMO slave market. It was at this point the 3 of them were separated.

After passing through various hands Cally eventually ended up in those of JollyWigs Circus at the age of 7. After a year of "training" in the use of her abilities, which really means her being given painful electric shocks or being scarred with a blade in her armpits and other places that were out of sight whenever she did something wrong when even her instructors had little idea as to what was possible with the kid, she was flung onto the stage to entertain large numbers of extremely rich individuals with her fire abilities.

Whenever she messed up, electrocution and scarring would follow. She was always equipped with transparent shock stickers when performing. When not performing she had to wear 5kg-each ankle and wrist shock cuffs, along with a shock collar and belt.

Forming friendships with anyone proved fairly difficult as other performers (*coughs* slaves *cough*) were often jealous of her as she didn't look deformed (like many of them did) and had cool fire powers (which none of them had) or were scared of being friends with her as the staff at the circus weren't above torturing one's friends as a punishment to the one. And like hell was she ever going to make a "friendship" with one of the staff that didn't look far more like a psychopathic bully dragging a poor kid around with them (but with the bully being a grown ass adult who should've formed empathy by now). Ultimately, however, she did manage to befriend a child with the ability to make her face go inside-out, a lad with skin, eyes and hair that glowed in the dark, a Wendigo stolen straight from Loki and a sentient robot that was used as a walking light-show.

The kid whose face went inside out ultimately died because the staff didn't put disinfectant on her to prevent that bare flesh she kept exposing from getting every air-borne disease known to man. The robot got scrapped to make a more entertaining one. Over time, her friends died and she made new ones with the new ones being increasingly toxic over time.

At the age of 14, a point at which the circus had been attempting to sexualise her to very little success due to her looking like and definitely having not even begun puberty yet, Cally made one of many escape attempts in which she ended up hiding inside one of the rubbish bins. Inside the bin was *insert drum roll* a VR Headset. After being caught because of there being trackers in all of that electrocution stuff, Cally snuck out again the night after next to find that the slaves the staff used for cleaning out the bins were unsurprisingly slacking off and stole the headset.

After she and her friends figured out how to turn it one, she was elected to go first due to the others being scared that wearing the device might kill them and them having the excuse of Cally being the one that found it to use to make sure they weren't the ones potentially putting their lives on the line.

Annnnnd that time was just a few hours after the Great Terrorist Organisation decided to start the Great Terrorist War and took everyone wearing a headset in the Horus Ring hostage, with the JollyWigs Circus fleet being extremely close to one of these planets.

Well the story begins around here so no spoilers.


Very little education, mostly just knows of the things that were around her at JollyWigs Circus and a few lil' bits during her time being passed around between owners. Got quite the interest in history, which she learned while in the VR Net. Knows a fair number of languages as these were taught to her in her time at JollyWigs Circus for her performances.


Slave followed by holy figure followed by soldier.

Accomplishments & Achievements

Kicking a tonne of ass.

Failures & Embarrassments

Getting her ass kicked a few times + one performance/rehearsal failure per scar.

Mental Trauma

Well, I think we all know for a fact that this kid is traumatized AF.

Intellectual Characteristics

Quick learner, very empathic and good at reading others to the point of practical lie detection

Morality & Philosophy

"Don't stab someone unless they try to stab you first", "your cookies is everyone's cookies"


"Don't stab people unless they try to stab you first"

Personality Characteristics


Freedom and the preservation of her own and her friends' lives.

Savvies & Ineptitudes

Good at gymnastics, parkour, climbing, dancing, fire tricks, kicking ass, wielding an axe (not really she just does a lot of downward slashes after jumps that break through basically anything and then cuts down anyone else as they're running away), using 2-handed machine guns, languages, drawing and learning. Bad at mathematics, social skills, not making accidental euphemisms, wielding any weapons outside of machine gun and axe, piloting ships, counting to 10 (she skips 6 EVERY, SINGLE, TIME and NEVER realizes it) and throwing things over long distances or with any accuracy.

Likes & Dislikes

Likes: sweet/high calorie foods, "rich people" food (tbf that stuff is delicious), burning things, jumping around between places like a hyper-active monkey on both speed and cocaine, enjoys the thrill of the fight while it's happening but that "wait a damn second I just straight-up killed 7 people" truck will always hit once the adrenaline stops flowing, reading stories, *some* videogames,

Dislikes: performing in front of large crowds (yeah she was not living a happy life at JollyWigs), spicy foods (it's ironic until you remember that she's ginger), beetroot, being examined (especially medically) by others, having large amounts of her skin showing (weird that someone with a nasty childhood might want to cover themselves as a means of cutting themselves off from their surroundings).

Virtues & Personality perks

Not quick to act at first (there might as well be a loading screen above her head of "what in the?" above her head every time something unexpected happens) but gets there, develops quite a package of bravery and analytical thinking, good at acting without bias as she's not been raised to have any political or religious beliefs, good at acting under pressure (used to it from performing in front of hundreds of high-expectations people with the threat of utter agony if she messes up even slightly).

Vices & Personality flaws

Quickly became addicted to sweet foods after being introduced to them, laughter sounds like a cat with throat cancer begging to be killed, often acts on emotion without getting to know a situation


Was made to keep a very high standard of hygiene in JollyWigs Circus but since then has dropped some of those standards to the point of basically being normal in this regard.


Contacts & Relations

She has friends within JollyWigs Circus but also makes plenty outside of it along the course of the story.

Family Ties

That other individual who survived the same experiments could be considered sort of family as they received the same genetic modifications and does matter later but ehhh. As for "nobody gets left behind" style family then its the friends at JollyWigs Circus and some of the ones she makes during the story.

Religious Views

None. Wasn't raised into a religion and wasn't taught science either, result is uncertainty in this regard as she's hearing all sorts of things from others.

Social Aptitude

Initially very quiet due to a "do as your told and shut the hell up" upbringing who would never think of so much as tapping someone's shoulder but this largely changes over the story's course.


Went through a phase of thinking that flipping people off was equivalent to waving at them because Draven "Finger-Munch" Holowitz knows how to spring a high-quality joke but we don't talk about the things that happened as a result of that.

Hobbies & Pets

Technically no pets but does like animals.


Has to consciously stop herself from sounding like a Looney Toon character on speed and this shows whenever she's emotional or getting caught in an ever-growing web of lies to avoid revealing that she was the one who stole the cookies.


Sarah Goldham

Wants to molest Cally (Important)

Towards Brigid/Cally/14X-L4T-E




Doesn't want to be left alone with Sarah (Trivial)

Towards Sarah Goldham




Sarah has a thing for redheads with ridiculously pale skin, apparently. Probably because they don't have souls. Also likes to compare herself to Cally but they both clearly went in different directions in response to the abuse they suffered. But in truth the attraction is based off of Cally being directly in front of Sarah when Sarah successfully screwed with the VR Net systems to get herself high and has attached the idea of Cally to the feeling of being high.

Relationship Reasoning

Sarah's weird.

Commonalities & Shared Interests

None it's not a relationship that would ever work you disgusting shippers.

Shared Secrets


Shared Acquaintances

Everyone in the VR Net except that Cally actually leaves good impressions most of the time and Sarah is just an abnormally small thug.

Wealth & Financial state

Is literally someone else's property and thus can have none of her own.
Divine Classification
Current Location
Year of Birth
2869 CurlyWurly 104 Years old
Circumstances of Birth
Created as part of a program to make soldiers that can conquer primitive intelligent species without weapons so that there's no risk of the intelligent species getting really advanced tech and posing a threat if they miraculously win. One of 3 survivors.
Unknown. Either an artificial womb or an impoverished area within the CHG. Was born a normal human either way.
Presented Sex
Gender Identity
Greeny bois.
"Everyone laugh at her, she's a ginger with hair so messy and wild that it legit looks like someone glued part of a ginger lion's mane to her scalp!"
Skin Tone/Pigmentation
Pale AF but with them "freckles" all over the place
5'4 as an adult.
115 lbs (yep that pressurized O2 ain't no joke)
Quotes & Catchphrases
"Miss Toaster will kick your ass if you keep calling her Miss Toaster" *gets called Miss Toaster again* *fight ensues. Cally loses to Tithy but puts up a valiant effort*

"I had every right to stab that hoe, she tried to stab me first."

"The fuck is [insert thing that literally everyone knows about]" *[is followed by different descriptions of thing that end up confusing her, especially since one of these descriptions is usually completely off... often deliberately]*
Aligned Organization
Other Affiliations
Known Languages
Spengulese (Portuguese, Spanish and English all had a baby and it was confusing), English, Franco-English.
Character Prototype
Hmmm... an extremely messy haired (I'm talking some anime level stuff) female redhead with green eyes and a slightly long nose. Now that I think about it there's a person I know whose face is the same as what I imagine for a live-action thing (oh gee what a coincidence) but their hair isn't red or nearly as massive and messy as I'm imagining and their eyes aren't green. That said more often than not I'm imagining animated characters. Also I'm writing books not making a show (although...) and don't plan on illustrations so use some headcannon. Hell if you like just imagine her as having blue hair the whole time it doesn't matter until it's plot relevant.

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Sage Dylonishere123
R. Dylon Elder
30 Jul, 2019 03:23

The opening quote was priceless. I also laughed when I read "Kicking a tonne of ass" cause I wanted to ask if we were talking metric tonnes. lol I think she sounds pretty interesting. I find myself laughing alot at your very casual way writing. I like it alot.

Dr Jimothy
Jimmy Shrekson
18 Oct, 2019 09:15

*breathes* ___________________________________________________________ T H A N K Y O U ! I can confirm the ass kicking is in metric tonnes, although before reaching that point there were many heretical scum who wished to measure it in pounds *shivers with rage*.

Sage Dylonishere123
R. Dylon Elder
18 Oct, 2019 15:36

The Horror! Those foul fiends. Thank goodness their diabolical plans were thwarted.