![Found a picture of my Mama and I. I miss her... [s]I'm afraid to hope I'll get her back[/s] #QRmodernAU](/uploads/images/43bfd2c3f74a7da2128a8718ddba10e9.png "Found a picture of my Mama and I. I miss her... [s]I'm afraid to hope I'll get her back[/s] #QRmodernAU")
Head Space
I thought she-- I don't know, I thought maybe she didn't really like me. I know what I've said before and thinking she was just some aloof pers--Goddess. But of course there was a part of me that thought she just didn't really like me, even after finding out she's my mother.
I keep calling her that. Mother. She hasn't been one in many senses of the word-- and now I know why. But... I can't, I can't get any hopes I had up that she'd be any different. It would hurt too much and I don't know how much more of that I can handle. Not right now. Not when... not when Ryleigh and I are...
Are we fighting? I'm... I said I was angry, but I'm not. I--
It hurts.
I don't even know if she understands exactly. I do know what she was trying to do but that didn't stop it from hurting. She told me not to take it out on her and she was talking about the anger I have for Unastine. But that wasn't why I wasn't talking to her, why I seemed angry...
I AM angry at Unastine. I am so-- I've shoved it so far back in my mind because there's other shit to deal with-- the harm she's done to--
I wasn't talking to her because I know I've been taking it out on her whenever I'm hurting, whenever I'm angry. So I-- I tried not to. I tried not to and she--.
I thought-- I thought she wouldn't push me away. I thought I'd gotten- I thought we had gotten past that. So wh-what am I supposed to do?
I can't just leave her alone
I don't know what to do.
About any of this.
Unastine really? What right does she-- did she have to do that? I never even thought about the fact that no one else progressed. Why would I? I was gone a lot... I stayed away from them.. I didn't notice... how could I not notice?
And ME to-- to teach them???
I can't, there's no way. Even if-- they hate me.
I don't know anything about Mielikki. Nothing.
And even if I did... Gunnloda...
I can't just... I don't know she couldn't stay in the druid circle. I'd have to tell Mielikki about her. Wouldn't I?
I want to but there's no guarantee she won't... she won't do something about it. We might need to tell the others soon...
Gunnloda has said time and time again she goes where I go... she'd stay somewhere out in the woods if I asked her to.
Will she... will she-- will we get to have that?
Will I get to-- will I get to be with her for that long?
Or-- no. No. She said now to-- and Takara said-- It's fine. I have now. That's-- that's fine.
Seirixori's Journal Ordered oldest to newest
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Day 8, Wedan 12 Jaqmont 3Y53
12th of Jaqmont 3Y53
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Day 8, Wedan 12 Jaqmont 3Y53
1 1 2
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Day 9, Fendan 13 Jaqmont 3Y53
1 1 3
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Day 10, Hotdan, 14 Jaqmont 3Y53
1 1 4
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Day 11 Andan 15 Jaqmont 3Y53
1 1 5
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Day 12-13, Mirdan 16 Jaqmont 3Y53
1 1 6
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Day 14
1 1 7
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I stopped keeping track of the days, sue me
1 1 8
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Arena Fight
1 1 9
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Wedding
1 1 10
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Some Old Dwarven Place - several days
1 1 11
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Running through Rodoza
1 1 12
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What
1 1 13
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Dragons, Temples, and Exes oh my
1 1 14
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Fuck Everything
1 1 15
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That... totally went well.
1 1 16
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Fear
1 1 17
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Forget Me Not
1 1 18
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Head Space
1 1 19
12th of Jaqmont 3Y53
1 1 2
1 1 3
1 1 4
1 1 5
1 1 6
1 1 7
1 1 8
1 1 9
1 1 10
1 1 11
1 1 12
1 1 13
1 1 14
1 1 15
1 1 16
1 1 17
1 1 18
1 1 19
The major events and journals in Seirixori's history, from the beginning to today.
Oh yeah, it's fine. Everything is fine. My wife can't speak, we don't need her to keep us alive or anything at all. Why would we, when CLEARLY everyone decided to fucking leave her to get eaten by that fucking thing. It's FINE.
12:19 pm - 28.09.2019Head Space
I thought she-- I don't know, I thought maybe she didn't really like me. I [i]know[/i] what I've said before and thinking she was just some aloof pers--Goddess. But of course there was a part of me that thought she just didn't really like me, even after f...
11:03 am - 28.08.2019She's been slowly poisoned, slowly dying, this entire time. After-- I thought-- there is too much to say...
08:59 am - 28.08.2019Fuck you floating head with a bunch of eyes. Wait, no. [i]Fuck you[/] whoever brought it there in the first place. [s]when will someone tell me about shit before I go walking head first into it?[/s]
09:37 am - 25.08.2019Forget Me Not
When I found my Mama... I was already expecting bad things. It's kind of how things have been going, you know? Small good thing, pretty big bad thing. She had no idea who I was. Thought I was an imposter... She said things... she said things she would...
01:25 pm - 20.07.2019Guess we have to go to a "lost" city anyway. [i]of course we do[/i]
09:41 am - 19.06.2019:( Was excited to see Ceren but found out her brother was killed by bandits [i]and[/i] the town is dealing with a horrible famine. Might have found part of the problem at least... [s]i wanted to say thank you but maybe after we fix the food situation[/s]
10:40 am - 11.06.2019Session0115
03:16 pm - 03.06.2019Session0115
03:16 pm - 03.06.2019Session 0114
02:38 pm - 03.06.2019I'm pretty sure I was seconds away from being [i]gifted[/i] a magic baby. Who just gifts magic babies!? ... ok I [i]know[/i] who would but I did not realize how so far out of touch she was with things. Holy shit.
10:17 pm - 02.06.2019Well, here we are finally. Back home. Time to talk to my... [i]mother[/i] I guess. There are so many questions and yet... no questions.
08:59 am - 01.06.2019Session 0114
01:11 pm - 31.05.2019Yesss the darkness, villain/dark mode is the only mode one needs
04:53 pm - 27.05.2019Fear
I told Ryleigh I was afraid to follow those guys... She said she was too but... I know she didn't get what I meant. She told me it didn't feel good when she killed that guy, when she essentially tortured him. Killed others... She was afraid I thi...
07:13 am - 27.05.2019...I shouldn't have run off. I would have liked to see her one last time. Do you think they'll let me in if I go as a wolf?
08:08 am - 26.05.2019I [i]guess[/i] I won't punch her in the face. [b]grumbles[/b]
06:20 am - 24.05.2019Session0113
05:39 am - 24.05.2019Found a picture of my Mama and I. I miss her... [s]I'm afraid to hope I'll get her back[/s] #QRmodernAU
09:50 am - 22.05.2019Druids live for a very long time, you know.
03:35 am - 22.05.2019This is way too much fun lmao
03:19 am - 22.05.2019Little sir why are you out here by yourself!? Now I gotta go find his parents. Even though he is so huggable ; ;
01:11 am - 22.05.2019I found a friend! She's so pretty!
11:04 am - 21.05.2019That... totally went well.
Tried talking to Gunnloda this morning about her drinking so much... I don't know if it did anything... besides making me feel real stupid for asking. I know she won't leave, I KNOW. But every time, _every_ time I want to bring something up that...
10:58 am - 21.05.2019Session0113
04:23 am - 21.05.2019There are now two gods I would like to punch in the face.
01:27 am - 21.05.2019Session0112
09:36 pm - 20.05.2019Thank you @the-real-god for commenting on that post I am crying with laughter. -even if it's sad-
02:55 pm - 20.05.2019...I made a new friend and then they killed her...
02:15 pm - 20.05.2019I made a new friend!
06:03 am - 20.05.2019I can fly
I finally figured out how to fly!
02:18 am - 20.05.2019@gunnloda-frostbeard I found a puppy! Can we keep him!?
08:39 pm - 19.05.2019Llaro, is a cave an okay substitute for a cabin?
11:31 pm - 18.05.2019In the thick of it now kids
10:16 pm - 18.05.2019What the fuck
06:05 pm - 18.05.2019Session0112
05:36 pm - 18.05.2019The list of amazing people following the adventures of Seirixori.
Venerable Master
Jennawynn
Jennifer Barnette
Forgemaster
Dimitris
Dimitris Romeo Havlidis
Social
Birthplace
Limabey Forest
Current Residence
Riverrun
Wealth & Financial state
She never really had money before, and isn't entirely sure what to do with it, but it's getting her a fancy hat and that's all that matters right now.
Family Ties
Affyria Iscitan
Religious Views
Insert shrug emoji here
Social Aptitude
Smart ass that doesn't like crowded areas. She exhibits some neurodivergent traits.
"I can't focus when there's too many people around and I don't know how to sort out all the noise" (0103 7:34)
Hobbies & Pets
She plays the flute, it helps calm her.
In Session0100, she tells Arkrus that her best friend as a kid was a goat named Penelope.
Speech
Technically Turkish accent but I don't know how to type that out so
And she rambles and will keep talking and say 50 things before she realizes that she should have stopped ages ago.