Remastered Armouries Inc

Hand-craft, artisanal guns and bullets - something even better than 'a bullet with your name on it'.  
— Remastered Armouries marketing
  No matter what progress is made in the art of making murder implements, some people will always prefer what came before. Remastered Armouries exploit this nostalgia for weapons of ages past, selling handcrafted pieces of art and the reconstruction of old guns. It's a much larger market than most would've guessed, and they've started to branch out into more... Creative interpretations of the past.    

Bullet With Your Name On It

Shooting people never goes out of style.  
— Remastered Armouries marketing
  Remastered Armouries specialize in high-end guns and bullets, with an emphasis in their marketing about the care and craftsmanship that goes into each piece. In reality, their order backlog has gotten so big that they use many of the same techniques as any other weapon manufacturer, but just add some scuff-marks on the end. The Armouries battery of 3D forges are closely guarded secrets, and any mention of them is pursued with lawsuits of libel and slander.   Some old-school gunsmiths are still kept around by the corporation, both for photo-ops and reality TV shows, and real special pieces. They've gotten a reputation for creating some of the finest firearms in the Megacity. At least, according to their marketing department.  


The old classics never fail.  
— Remastered Armouries marketing
  The core of Remastered Armouries' initial business was the faithful recreation of guns from the past. Anything from the first blunderbuss to the AK-47, to rare and forgotten firearms of history. Not only to look the part but to operate the same - exactly the same. Every kink and fault with the original is painstakingly remade, no matter how dangerous that might be to the operator. For gun-collectors unable to get their hands on an original piece, such recreations are the next best thing. Others just want to have something old or iconic, and the Armouries is happy to deliver.   Recently, Remastered have also started recreating guns and weapons found in fiction. Everything from the iconic guns used in the 'Cutter Charles' movie franchise to other, mythological weapons.  
This expansion has put them in direct competition with the Functional Cosplay Forge corporation, and sparks (and bullets) are expected to fly soon.


What's better than an old favorite? One with higher caliber.  
— Remastered Armouries marketing
  When just remaking the past isn't good enough for a consumer due to things like "safety concerns," the Armouries 'remaster' old favorites. Remastered firearms look and function mostly the same but have been updated with the latest advances in firearms to make them safer and smoother to operate. There's a price-sheet of tweaks and alterations for consumers to pick between, although only the most obvious changes are actually implemented. If there's a corner that can be cut, the Armouries is right there with a buzzsaw.  
by Johny Mnemonic (with slight alterations)
Remastered weaponry has a mixed reputation within the firearms culture of Megacorpolis - some consider it next to heresy to change the mechanics of such vaulted pieces of history.   In contrast, others just don't want to have their fingers shot off by some mechanical failures.
  Remastered Armouries have struck a partnership with WeekendWarriors Corp, supplying the later with 'period accurate' weapons for whatever atrocity they've got planned. Due to corporate shenaniganery, it isn't entirely clear if Centurion Arms & Armor knows their subsidary has this deal in place or not.  


Have you ever wondered; what if...  
— Remastered Armouries marketing
  The 'what ifs' of the weapon world are part alternative history and part fever-dream. Small but growing in popularity, these reimaginings include both popular weapons and entire lines of design - what if this trend had continued instead of that and so on. Many firearms aficionados scoff at these kinds of reproductions, as they're almost always less effective than what's already around... But who doesn't want a luger rifle or a bazooka that shots swarms of missiles?  
by Johny Mnemonic
by Johny Mnemonic (with slight alterations)


Remastered Armouries sells guns as well as bullets - and in the cases of some of their older reconstructions, they're the only game in town. They guard their proprietary bullet-casings viciously, while simultanously copying the design from any show or game they can get away with.  
Customers can indeed have their bullets engraved with any particular name, or the ever popular 'to whomever it may concern'

In The City

As far as weapon manufacturterers are concerned, Remastered Armouries have always been relatively small. It's worked in their favor - it's not until recently that they have really registered by MegaCorps and their business models copied. Centurion Arms & Armor have begun to court the Remastered corporation for a potential acquisition. It has in turn made other Corps start looking at them, if only to foil whatever it is Centurion wants.   With this renewed attention and imitation of their business, Remastered Armouries have vastly expanded their Lawfare Department. Lawsuits are being unleashed around the city like bullets from a gatling, and when that fails, they've been known to use actual bullets instead. Corps and people have started taking bets on these feuds, and bounties are ripe for the picking by mercs across Megacorpolis.


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27 Dec, 2020 00:41

By the Java! That reminds me! They should have my shipment of 'Monday Monday, not so Dum Dum' rounds in! Woot! just in time for Weekend Warrior Conspiracy Weekend!   Q, just dang... this is HILARIOUS as always! And it's equal parts unnerving and delightful how well it fits so nicely...   Because It's ALL CONNECTED! *insert dah dah daaaaaahhhhhhhhhh! sound here*

— The wolf of Tales of Justice, Creator of Legends of Elohey, Star Wars: Shards, Fiven Chronicles and more!
27 Dec, 2020 09:07

Hahah, thank you!   At some point, I'll get around to writing about the bullet vending machines littering Megacorpolis, too. :D And who doesn't want an AK that shoots lasers?

27 Dec, 2020 13:53

I hereby stan this marketing department. :D   VERY well done!

27 Dec, 2020 17:23

Hahah, thank you very much! :D   I don't even know what I did with them, but it seems to have worked out!

27 Dec, 2020 15:14

Best marketing department ever. I like that they are like 'all our weapons are hand-crafted' but actually they're not anymore. XD

1 Jan, 2021 07:45

It was too expensive and couldn't fulfill all their orders :D You might get lucky, hold onto that, consumer!

31 Dec, 2020 21:57

And remember: Shoot straight.

Too low they build who build beneath the stars - Edward Young