Solhdier's Teleportation Bread

"I have done nothing but teleport bread for three days...  
— Solhdier 'The Bread King'.
 
Mentions of Solhdier's Teleportation Bread is often met with dispaired sighs and looks of horror from those in the know. It is not something one brings up unless a certain three-day period is on the horizon. It is an especially disliked topic among most Well-Arrived Individuals.  
 

Inventor: Solhdier the Bread King.

It was invented by an odd fellow, even among Well-Arrived Individuals, known as simply Solhdier the Bread King. One is not sure if it was done by malice or just pure idiocy but the damage is done so that does not exactly matter anymore.  
 

Creation

"Where have you been sending it!  
Absard Le'Powerfalh.
Using his altered Astral Teleportation Clock over a period of three sleep-deprived days, Salhdier did nothing but teleport bread. Where is unknown, though Solhdier claimed he sent it all 'home'. An answer that filled more than a few with dread, since no one really knows from where Well-Arrived Individuals originate from.  
 

Reappearance

Three days later, the bread reappeared. Poping into existence, smelling as if it all had been freshly taken out of the oven. And it was not just a few dozen loaves of bread; no it expanded into hundreds upon hundreds of loaves of bread. No one has managed to get an approximate counting of all bread loaves but it ventures between either 389 or 453.
How in the world Solhider managed to bake it all is a mystery and some wonder if the amount of bread may have been multiplied wherever it was sent.
At first, people did not really see the harm in all the bread but then it just kept appearing and appearing and soon an entire Cericor street was buried under a mountain of it all. Fortunately, the loaves of bread soon began teleporting away soon thereafter, and some would say they evaporated like bubbles. But the worst was not over yet.  
 

The Breaded

Some people who had been buried under the mountain of bread decided to try and eat themselves out. The only fault in that plan was that it teleported them away as well, though why no one is sure. When they later appeared, they were more monsters than anything else, covered in tumors and odd bread outcroppings. They were attracted to the teleporting bread and can now be found close by wherever a loaf of bread manifests.
Due to this, it is not advised to eat the odd teleporting bread. No matter how delicious it smells or looks like.  
Type
Several.
Alternate Name
The Cursed Bread.
Tumor Bread.
Breaded Bread.

Comments

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12 Dec, 2021 15:19

OMG what in the name of all that is holy did I just read? XD I'm nearly falling off my chair here because I can't stop laughing! Well done!


Creator of the Kaleidoscope System, an alien star system shaped by a colorful radiation source.   My Pledge for Summer Camp 2022
13 Dec, 2021 10:38

Glad you like it XD This article is such a joke but I cannot deny it was really fun to write.

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17 Dec, 2021 15:54

Wait? What is this? Myth? History? What?   What have I read exactly? It is really funny and then it gets... scary. But still, funny and well made!

Worldkeymaster, also known as A of Worldkeymaster.
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19 Dec, 2021 21:30

Thank you. ^-^ It is a Item, which a bunch of history of it thrown in xd. And what you have rad, is more of a joke article than anything else. One spontaneously made in the heat of the moment. xd

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"If you look upon the stars, know that you look upon a light of the past."