Session 15: Wedding Song

The wedding of Achilles and Patroclus took place over three days, a welcome respite for the party after their harrowing adventures over the past week or so. With Eris’ golden apple fiasco seemingly averted by Kallos giving the apple back to Aegis (and Aegis apparently eating it), the adventurers were free to enjoy the feasting, dancing, and general party atmosphere.
The first day of the wedding, called the Proaulia, was hosted by Achilles at a Trojan tavern and served as a “bachelor’s party” of sorts. The party members were greeted by a familiar face—Charaxos the Lesbian wine salesman—whose presence made Callidora suspicious. Still, Aegis and the other party members who partook of the wine suffered no ill effects. The drinks even seemed to enhance the mood of the party guests.
Achilles gave a very soppy and very drunk toast to Kallos, or as he called her, “Big.” Amara joined the band by playing the flute. Meredythe started to dance, but she found herself feeling rather isolated, as none of the Greeks or Trojans were familiar with the medieval dances of Meredythe’s day and age. Suddenly, Charaxos came up to Meredythe. Callidora watched them carefully but was unable to hear when Charxos revealed himself to be Dionysus in disguise.
The wine god warned Meredythe about her weapon, the World-Render, and the “strange energies” it was giving off. He pointed out that Meredythe had his thyrsus (given to the party in Session 2) to use as an alternate magical staff.

“It’s killing you, Meredythe,” he said, meaning the World-Render.
In response, Meredythe took off her armor to reveal a large scar spreading all across her back. Callidora saw this and became worried.
“Not many people want to see me alive, anyway,” Meredythe replied bitterly.
Dionysus tilted his head and asked, “You don’t really think that, do you?” He gestured toward the dance floor, where the Argonauts and the other party members were celebrating. He then smiled, told Meredythe, “Drinking with friends is always better than drinking alone,” and left to continue blessing the celebration through his wine.

Callidora then noticed Odysseus sneaking out of the tavern through a side door. She cast Pass Without Trace and followed him, actually managing to startle the wily rogue. Odysseus returned the gold he had stolen in the previous session and told Callidora:
“When the call came for us to go to war, I honestly thought I’d never go home again. I’m destined to die at sea—or on land, but ‘death will come out of the sea.’ Now I can barely believe I can go home. And before I left, I might have offended the entire noble population of Ithaca, so they won’t be happy to see me again. So I’m trying to think of a plan of how to go home unrecognized, kill all the nobles, and somehow avoid dying by prophecy.”
Callidora told him that prophecies could be avoided, and fate could be changed. Odysseus was doubtful, but Callidora insisted that her party’s experiences over the past eight days proved that it was possible. Odysseus smiled at this. “I knew your group was special somehow,” he said, once again having gleaned new information from the party members, casting doubt on whether or not his “death from the sea” story was even true.
She returned to the party to find Meredythe arm-wrestling Jason while Amara and Caeneus bet on the outcome. Jason narrowly defeated Meredythe. Atalanta took Kallos up on her offer to arm-wrestle and defeated the Goliath.
The second day of the wedding was the day of ceremony. Kallos and Aegis went to the hills around Mount Ida to find a goat to sacrifice. While they were there, Aegis spotted a figure with strangely-shaped legs in the distance and bluntly asked, “Why don’t you have normal legs?”
The figure laughed and revealed himself as Hephaestus, here to bless Kallos in preparation for the wedding ceremony.

“I’m not a great believer in the power of marriage, with my wife and all, and my parents’ marriage is the most fucked-up of all,” he said.
“Yes,” said Kallos. “But this wedding is going to be much better.”
“I know. That’s why I believe in what you’re doing here. Honestly, it’s about time I saw a wedding of two people who honestly love each other. And I might be wrong, but I think—I think Hera may have a soft spot for you after this. She may be a petty bitch, but underneath it all, she really does care about marriage going hand in hand with love, even if hers doesn’t.”

After finding a goat for the sacrifice (and dissuading Aegis from eating it), Kallos and Aegis returned to the city for the wedding procession. It was an unusually warm day for winter, and flowers were blooming and young maidens gathering them. A woman in a green dress offered Callidora a flower crown—it was Persephone, having left the Underworld temporarily to attend the wedding. In a rare moment of emotion, Callidora teared up as she accepted the crown. Persephone then told her:

“I want you to know they’re okay,” she said, meaning Callidora’s parents. “They’re at peace, and they’re happy, and they want you to be happy, too.”

Callidora thanked the goddess, then cried outright once Persephone had left. Amara and Meredythe noticed this and went over to comfort her.
Achilles came in the procession, wearing a beautiful dress with armor over it and a veil over his face. He met Patroclus at the altar, and Kallos began the ceremony with some nervousness:

“Dearly beloved, we have gathered here today to celebrate the marriage of Achilles and… what’s that one’s name?... Patroclus. Do you Achilles, promise to love and be patient and listen and to do the weaving together with this one?”
‘I do,” said Achilles.
She turned to Patroclus. “Do you promise to stay together in love, in sickness and in health, and make decisions and do weaving together forever and ever?”
“I do,” said Patroclus, and he kissed his groom.
"By the power vested in me, I pronounce you both husbands!" Kallos finished triumphantly.

Achilles and Patroclus went to have a ritual bath together. Kallos sacrificed the goat, and Aegis ripped it apart with her bare hands and ate it. Then the whole wedding party went back to Achilles’ designated tavern for the feast.
Aegis felt a rumbling in her stomach, but nothing came of it.
Meredythe told Amara she would take her up on her offer. “To play for you?” Amara asked.
“To play… to dance… either one,” said Meredythe.
Amara tripped on her way to the dance floor, but Meredythe caught her in an impromptu dip. As they stared dramatically into each other’s eyes, Aegis taught Kallos and Callidora a new dance (“Wave, then punch! Wave, then punch!”), which caught on quickly to the other guests and inadvertently terrified Odysseus, who was still wary of Kallos.
The third day hosted a sports tournament. The first contest was a race, in which Aegis and Atalanta competed alongside Prince Paris of Troy. Aegis emerged triumphant, having easily outrun her opponents.
Next came the contest of archery. Callidora, Amara, Meredythe, and Aegis all competed with Odysseus, but the wily Ithacan defeated them, with Callidora coming in second place. Odysseus showed off his recurve bow. Callidora asked him where she could get one of those, and he explained that he had carved it himself out of an olive tree.
The final competition was a sparring tournament, with each match going to first blood. Achilles went up against Kallos, who quickly defeated him, which angered the groom. Patroclus comforted his now-husband as Jason volunteered to fight Aegis. Aegis won again, and the competition came down to herself and Kallos. Aegis was hesitant about fighting Kallos, but Kallos insisted it was all in good fun and the two sparred, with Aegis coming up on top. Someone in the crowd cheered, “Truly, you must be blessed by the gods!” (Achilles and Jason fought for third place, and Achilles defeated the Argonaut, lifting his mood.)
The wedding came to a close as Achilles and Patroclus, along with the rest of the Myrmidons, sailed for home so the two of them could officially move in together. Jason approached the rest of the Argonauts and asked them if they were ready to continue on the glorious quest for the Golden Fleece. The party said their goodbyes to their Trojan friends, and the Argo set sail.
After a long period of silent contemplation, unseen by anyone but Dóro, Meredythe threw her World-Render into the sea. Its eerie green light sank deeper and deeper into the ocean, until it disappeared completely.

Relations

Protagonists

Aegis, Amara, Callidora, Kallos, Meredythe Maegwund

Allies

Achilles, Patroclus, Dionysus, Odysseus, Jason, Caeneus, Atalanta, Calais and Zetes, Hephaestus, Persephone

Competitors

Atalanta (race), Paris (race), Odysseus (archery), Achilles (sparring), Jason (sparring)

Plot type

Session