Welcome Back Kal Holst by VN | World Anvil
View
Atunda, 26 Nelona, 12731

Welcome Back Kal Holst

by Jedi Knight VN Ysadora

Getting from the hyperspace exit to the planet is half our problem, because there's a multi-sided space battle in progress.

 
MSgt Jenkins connects to me and starts updating. He has been having a no-fun month. He'd like for me to arrange No Weird At All. I instead promise that I'm here to take custody of All The Weird. We give each other the most important bulletins we can think of, which include that I'm not the only one who has been blocked off from access to proper Holonet-based communications.

 
Getting across Port Etmar to the battle eastward is a bump in the overall road. There's a Mentat here who (in the Living Force) looks a HECKIN' LOT like Kitkat. The real Kitkat! But he is introducing himself as "Reese Pieces".

 
General Kerplocken goes off to help Chancellor Cantor figure out how to deal with foreign government stuff. He promises to try not to get murdered.

 

You know what would be hilarious?


"Ambassador Derma of the Freedworld Republics presents his official identification to the Alliance of Worlds".


Senator Skywalker would take a turn making me peel veggies.

— Vanya to So'Zen and Davish

 
So'Zen goes off to diplomatically present Queen Sabine to the government of the Freedworlds Republic, taking Kal Holst along. That should cause some fun as Kal and Sabine explain what's really been going on regarding the Eborreans.

 

Things I did not think we would have to be researching this year, part ... seventeen? I think? Tapani High Vor marriage law in the post-Republic constitutional revision.

I mean. I knew marital regulatory issues would come up on occasion. Divorce work and so on. But I expected it to be non-Vor or maybe Low Vor. I figured the Orange Catholics had a monopoly on the High Vor.

— Vanya to Davish

 
Davish goes off to confirm that his fellow Knight Errant Sir Saphor Kronn, ace pilot, is still 1) in Chalcedon System 2) alive 3) in possession of his own mind, because "Reese" tells us that some kind of twelve assassin club has decided they want all Crimson Knights gotten out of the way. Sir Kronn got mentioned back on Fact card 107.

 
Aerena and Reese and I go off to the continuing battle to the east of Port Etmar, so that Aerena can enjoy shooting people while "Reese" and I use the pretext of telling her stuff to catch one another up.

 
We are supposed to all meet up again at Lady Zaye's house after we get these chores done, because that is likely to be a secure location for personal conversations.

 

Vanya is obviously scanning whatever she wants to say for what should maybe not be said in mixed company


Vanya to Reese and Aerena: Aerena, are you familiar with Orange Catholic virtues and sins?


Aerena: Not even the concept of orange as an element of religion


Reese: The OC prohibition against thinking machines is of particular interest to me, especially considering the recent uprising. I think someone might get another doctoral thesis out of studying the droid's involvement in the formation of the Freedworlds.


Vanya to Reese and Aerena: Yeah, I think you and some of our current companions are going to be an exciting issue for anybody with a popcorn bucket.


Vanya to Aerena: I spend more time these days around non-clergy members of the faith than more dedicated followers. But Mentats are Orange Catholic, and so are Bene Gesserit, and so are the Order of Solicitors. I'm not that kind of monk. But I'm a chaplain so I have to understand enough to be useful to my troops.

And here's what you need to know right this moment about Orange Catholics: To lie is a sin. To kill a human is a sin. To let pain control you is a sin. And they find "thinking machines" to be horrible, which some interpret as loosely as "any cyborg" because every religion has some jackasses in it. But the thinking machines thing apparently comes from the last time the Awakeen and the Eborreans got into a fight in this part of this galaxy.


Aerena: Which means they are going to find this VERY interesting


Vanya to Reese and Aerena: And the fun thing is, as I often have to point out: I am not Orange Catholic. I can lie if my conscience is okay with the results. But I think it's rude for me to lie to a cleric of the Orange Catholic faith when I'm trying to be pleasant company.


Vanya to Reese: So, let me know if I get too close to something you find uncomfortable here, okay?


Reese: Oh, I have to be quite comfortable about smoking a turd in purgatory for lying if it prevents a mass extinction event.


Vanya to Reese: :snerk: Tough but fair!


Vanya to Aerena: Until about five years ago, I often worked with a Mentat in the employ of some of the Jedi Council's closest allies. I liked and trusted this guy. He did something ...


: Vanya has to discard several ways to say something because they break a rule :


Vanya to Aerena: ... He did something frakking looney that I cannot discuss. At all. Even obliquely. And it got him moved into a different job, which means I haven't seen him nor communicated directly with him since nearly five years ago. But if I ran into him today, I would still probably trust him implicitly.


: Vanya tilts her head toward Reese :


Vanya to Aerena: This guy reminds me enough of the guy who was my friend, that they could be cousins.


Reese: Did this Mentat look like me? He might be my exact genotype. We are not complete strangers to cloning techniques when certain situations arise.


Vanya to Reese: You know, to my perceptions, I think it's downright uncanny. Good thing you're not a stormtrooper.


Reese: Indeed.


Reese winks.


Reese: That was why I mentioned the colored jewelry earlier, hoping you might be able to point me a direction where I might be able to find someone offering such jewelry. Your unique perceptions, that is.


Vanya to Reese: Well. There's a ghost in the temple. So I imagine there's some jewelry but listen, man, a lot of it looks like trees.


Vanya to Reese: Looked, I mean. Uh, that was a month and change ago. We'll have to go check it again once we get some time.


Vanya to Reese: Oh! And there's a well of the Dark Side up in the mountains that will take a decade or so to finish unknotting. And there's a Sith-wannabe looney dude running around the tunnels in the desert.

Again: was. Last month.


Aerena: Fun times on Chalcedon



 
Over here are a number of locals wearing dirt-brown synthskin bodygloves (probably at the training of the Beskar Aran!) laying prone in ambush as invading Bloodsmith Raiders in skiffs and at least one walker tank. This battle has obviously been going on for a while, attack and retreat and ambush and so on.

 
So having the three of us show up to support the Republic should be great! Right?

 
Only they planted a doorbuster mortar onto the knee of a walker

 
and at just the right rhythm to draw in a quartet of Aur'rook

 
We probably could not have gotten all the Bloodsmiths out of there in time even if they HAD all believed us. Or obeyed Satina of the Qo'shasot.

 
No, the three idiots in the disabled skiff refused to follow instructions until the four Aur'rook came up to their full five story height above the sand!

 
And since Reese was trying to save somebody from the sand whirlpool, I had to step forward and talk peace back into the space. Convince the Aur'rook by my attitude and actions that we delight in them (well, that I do) and that no one here is a slaver or in any way a threat to their children.

 
Once we had defused the situation, the idiots in the skiff surrendered and the Aur'rook left for deeper sands, I asked one of the Fremen "Which Roughneck had the bright idea to bait the Aur'rook into being a surprise weapon?"

 
Goss, it turns out.

 
Goss is up north dealing with some bandits.

 
Goss is gonna get some stomach crunches assigned to him by his chaplain.

 
Goss is gonna get assigned to figure out how to negotiate a mutual benefit relationship with the Aur'rook where if they come clean up enemy equipment on request, they get FED. Or other resource as suits them.

 
Goss is going to write out two hundred fifty-seven times, no voice-to-text nonsense,

I will not treat people like things, no matter their shape or size or language.

 
And I still have to find Lady Ventress so I can return her property and introduce Mister Cee!

Continue reading...

  1. Memorable meals
  2. And me without my datapadd
    Satunda, Telona 13th, 12731
  3. Mystic Mobs Investigations: Backstage
    Katunda, Telona 17th, 12731
  4. Thirty-six days and counting
    Nelona 12th, 12731
  5. Sequential report: Lights Snuffed Out
    Katunda, Nelona 12th, 12731
  6. Thirty-six days completed
    Katunda, Nelona 12th, 12731
  7. Give that Mentat a cookie!
    Satunda, Nelona 13th, 12731
  8. Faultline
    Datunda, Nelona 14th, 12731
  9. Pumpkin Dinner
    Datunda, Nelona 14th, 12731
  10. Four against One? Okiedokie.
    Datunda, Nelona 14th, 12731
  11. Ysalamiri
    Datunda, Nelona 14th, 12731
  12. Intermezzo 3.07.8.5
    Datunda, Nelona 14th, 12731
  13. More and More and More Every Day
    Datunda, Nelona 14th, 12731
  14. Jawas in Spaaaaaace
    Datunda, Nelona 14th, 12731
  15. Ides of Nelona Client Progress Report
    Natunda, Nelona 15th, 12731
  16. Welcome Back Kal Holst
    Atunda, 26 Nelona, 12731
  17. the Ghost of Future Vegetable Peeling
    Atunda, 26 Nelona, 12731
  18. Aggressive Negotiations Fremen Style
    Atunda, 26 Nelona, 12731
  19. Nobody knows I'm a detective.
    Datunda, 29 Nelona, 12731
  20. Reese the Battlefield Sportscaster
    Datunda, 29 Nelona, 12731
  21. post-hurricane
    Datunda, 29 Nelona, 12731
  22. Braiding is a skill.
    Datunda, 29 Nelona, 12731
  23. Aboard the Loaner Shuttle _Shenanigans_
    Datunda, 29 Nelona, 12731
  24. The droid did WHAT?
    Datunda, 29 Nelona, 12731
  25. Chausid Station
    Natunda, 30 Nelona, 12731
  26. We Do Not Touch the Creepy Artifact
    Natunda, 30 Nelona, 12731
  27. Thin Darkness
    Natunda, 30 Nelona, 12731
  28. Perspective Adjustments
    Katunda, 31 Nelona, 12731
  29. Spider Pez
    Atunda, 6 Helona, 12731
  30. Intersections
    Atunda, 6 Helona, 12731
  31. Unauthorized scan detected
    Atunda, 6 Helona, 12731
  32. The Anti-Life Equation
    Atunda, 6 Helona, 12731
  33. one of WHOSE children?
    Atunda, 6 Helona, 12731
  34. Space Shanties
    Atunda, 6 Helona, 12731
  35. Threes
    Atunda, 6 Helona, 12731
  36. The old Chaos Goblin routine
    Satunda, 18 Helona, 12731
  37. SSD Hardridge Bulwark
    Satunda, 18 Helona, 12731
  38. First Rule of parrying incoming vehicular blasts: DO NOT
    Satunda, 18 Helona, 12731
  39. Zorphax
    Datunda, 29 Helona, 12731
  40. Ghostie al Saba
    Datunda, 29 Helona, 12731
  41. Okay, but why did you leave it in a vault?
    Datunda, 29 Helona, 12731
  42. Escape Velocity
    Datunda, 4 Melona, 12731
  43. chuck the faux Gamesman to the crowd
    Datunda, 4 Melona, 12731
  44. Here to Rescue Somebody
    Natunda, 10 Melona, 12731
  45. Natunda, 10 Melona, 12731
    Natunda, 10 Melona, 12731
  46. Pest Control
    Natunda, 10 Melona, 12731
  47. No matter where you go
    Natunda, 10 Melona, 12731
  48. There you are.
    Natunda, 10 Melona, 12731
  49. Library Card
    Satunda, 13 Melona, 12731

Find your way!

Resources

WHO WE ARE

LEGAL

Get the news

Listen to our Podcast

Our Allies

Dungeon Fog
Gold Ennie 2019 for Best Digital Aid
by 3 Armored Kittens · Prodromos v.1.1 - World Anvil 0.9.15.009 © 2017-2024 [en] | Anvil Time: 17:20, Apr 28 2024