Mountain On Strings
by hughpierre
Verse 1:I crossed the vast and lonely salt flat, with nothing but the sound of the distant gongs to keep me company. The expanse stretched out before me like an unforgiving sea, and the hot sun beat down on me relentlessly. As I walked, I couldn't help but think about the stories I had heard of this place - stories of a once-great empire fallen into ruin, its people scattered and its culture lost. As I listened to the melody echoing in my mind, I began to question everything I had been told. "Maybe the elders hadn't acted in the best interest of our people. Maybe they had sold our future to our conquerors, leaving nothing for us."
The people in power, they twist the strings.
They do the bidding of the wealthy kings.
Dhani brothers, we've seen this before,
Our elders sold us out, now we're left poor.
Dhani brothers, we've seen this before,
Our people suffer, while they ask for more.
Chorus:
Brothers, don't believe the lies they tell.
Brothers, we'll rise up and break this spell.
They've taken everything, but we'll take it back,
Together we'll stand, never lose track.
Verse 2:As the metallic beats grew louder in my ears, I felt a surge of hope - maybe we could do it. "Maybe we could reclaim sovereignty, and carve out a new home but it would surely be bloody."
Wake up, young men, it's time to fight.
Tear down the strings that hold us tight.
The conquerors come, they want to take,
Our future's at stake, for our sake.
The conquerors come, they want to take,
Our strings in their hands, our fate they make.
Chorus:
Brothers, don't believe the lies they tell.
Brothers, we'll rise up and break this spell.
They've taken everything, but we'll take it back,
Together we'll stand, never lose track.
Bridge:
The strings they hold, they won't let go,
But we'll fight for freedom, and we'll show,
That no more will we be slaves,
Our spirits strong, our will unbreakable.
Chorus:
Brothers, don't believe the lies they tell.
Brothers, we'll rise up and break this spell.
They've taken everything, but we'll take it back,
Together we'll stand, never lose track.
I really love your style of poetry! And I'm about to write some poetry pretty soon, and I was wondering if you could give me any tips or tricks?
Thank you for the compliment. I struggle to say that I was aiming for any particular style of poetry? I had the workings of a short scene in my head and endeavored to focus on sensory details, use vivid language that evokes emotions and experimented with different techniques like rhyme, meter and imagery. Not too dissimilar from writing prose. Once I had the song, I interspersed it in 'quote boxes' so that I could write a quick historical context for the verses. Just to give it some uniqueness. Not sure if this was helpful. Was there something specific you wanted me to elaborate on?
well, when I say "style" I meant like the rhyme scheme, and meter. I've always struggled with creating rhymes and things like that, even though I generally have an idea about what I want to say. How do you create those nice wonderfully rhyming stanzas with good meter and flow?
I would say focus on expressing your ideas and emotions in a way that feels natural to you. Once you have a draft, you can go back and play around with the structure to make it sound more poetic. It's all about finding your own voice.
Okay, so even if I really enjoy rhyming poetry, if it doesn't seem to fit or work with me, then I probably should try to focus on some other aspect of poetry?