The Razzer

A wily watery revenant rudely regaling wary wanderers with raspberries...
On a planet where flying mechanical horses and graceful unicorns occupy the same territories as enormous equines, giant flightless buzzards, and murderous dive-bombing raptors, no creature has proven more mysterious, more unapproachable, more mischievous than this famous denizen of the colossal Southern Salt region bordering Kundain. As intrepid an explorer as he was, for all of his feats, even Deres could not crack the case of this crude crooner of the currents. With the uptick in tourism, there have been some grassroots efforts to brand this creature "Rassie", or "Berrie" as an homage to a much more famous-and just as enigmatic- cryptid of the Oldworld.

Basic Information

Anatomy

Eyewitness accounts share one consistent detail: A long sinuous neck the approximate length/height of the average humanoid with a large roundish head, two round ears or ridge-like protrusions, two beady eyes, and a long, wide tongue.

Biological Traits

"Accounts vary whether the Razzer has gleaming white scales or semi-translucent pale skin. It might even be able to alter skin color like a octopus or cuttlefish. It would certainly explain how it's evaded detection for so long..."

— Sarah Ann Goode, xenohistorian

Ecology and Habitats

The Razzer has never been seen in any other body of water such as the Winding White or associated tributaries, Gual de Phu Aclu, or Lake Danaetanera, indicating it requires an exclusively saltwater habitat, not to mention the dense plant growth of the Salt enhances its ability to remain hidden. Because of the varying depths of the Salt, it obviously knows how to navigate and where to find deep water troughs to retreat in a hurry.

RazzerAmbush.jpg

Aquatic Ambush by Mardrena

Made in PD Howler

Dietary Needs and Habits

Very little is known about its physiology. No droppings have ever been found, and given the chemical content of the Salt, it remains difficult to identify dietary discharges from the rest of the morass. More than likely it is an omnivore, dining upon fish, reeds, weeds, and perhaps even plankton.

Biological Cycle

Having existed on Thanged for a very long time and being known of for at least five thousand years, details about the Razzer remain unknown suffice that there have to be more than one. To test a theory, a group of academically-minded Freelanders split up into two teams and set off for locations hundreds of miles apart. When they reunited weeks later, they exchanged reports and time stamps, showing they had both been "razzed" at roughly the same period of time. The Razzer cannot be one single creature.

Behaviour

DeresJournalRazzerb.jpg

Deres and The Razzer by Mardrena

Made with BlackInk

"Confound this creature! It hounds my every step! Have I slighted it somehow? Have I endangered its young? Is it threatening me? Is it taunting me? Is it courting me? I am afraid I am not its type!"

— Deres, the Father of Metal

"Here we have a page from Deres' rather hastily-made entry regarding his encounter with 'The Razzer'. Let's just say Thanctiorn's come quite a long way over five thousand years, but you can pretty much suss out the gist of what he meant. At the bottom margin you can see some theories of his own regarding the possible true nature of the creature. He seemed to be familiar with other prehistoric creatures. We see something that looks like a plesiosaur as well as a...rather unsettling image, perhaps inspired by anglerfish, but those only occur in extremely deep water, of which Thanged has none."

— Sarah Ann Goode, xenohistorian

The Razzer's vocalizations have been recounted in a variety of styles from either low, wet, and flappy to high-pitched, drawn out, and tinny. Whether this is a form of communication remains unknown.

Additional Information

Geographic Origin and Distribution

The Southern Salt

Average Intelligence

The Razzer has the presence of mind to know when someone has their back turned. It seems to exclusively target humanoids as animals dwelling in the Salt show no signs of distress or alarm. It seems to "prioritize" individuals traversing land as it does not target Pegasi riders nor boatmen nor swimmers, though why anyone would want to swim in the Salt is anyone's guess...
Attempts have been made to place probes and cameras in deeper portions of the Salt in recent years, but the Razzer has a uncanny knack for sneaking up on them, seizing them, and ejecting them onto the marshy ground. Either it views them as intrusive to its territory or can sense human hands behind them.

Perception and Sensory Capabilities

It remains debatable whether the two ridge-like protrusions are actually ears or serve a different sensory purpose, the Razzer seems able to pick up on bio-electric currents and sense shifts in movement in the soil accompanied by adventurers on foot. It does not seem capable or willing to respond to travellers outside of land or water as it does not seem to react to passengers on boats nor riders on Pegasi.

Civilization and Culture

History

Everyone knows Deres for his jaunt up and down the banks of the Winding White and how he discovered the metal that would bear his name behind the confines of the Northern Ring, but his studies of other regions and discoveries often go overlooked. The Salt would prove abundant in black water that would prove valuable for a number of critical implements prized by both the Traedeskaton and Peirolyth.
While stooping down to collect samples of black water, Deres found himself inexplicably subjected to a battery of rude vocalizations of varying pitch and length. He could only ever catch glimpses out the corner of his eye and made hasty notations in his journal but finished harvesting samples and promptly exited the great salt marsh, the mysterious vocalizations hot on his heels.

Razzer2.jpg

Razzer Sketch by Mardrena

Pencil sketch

Roth's Edict forbade disruptive destruction of the environment, but she has relaxed her rules in regards to critical resources. Deres designed pontoon-mounted extractors to harvest black water safely without harming the environment, and gatherers who retrieve supplies on a daily basis will report occurrences of "razzing". Since black water is viewed as a contaminant to fresh and salt water and hazardous to other organisms, workers can't tell whether The Razzer is upset at their presence or simply being impish.
With increased tourist travel from the Oldworld, boatmen in the Salt have taken to singing aloud in an effort to placate The Razzer, taking inspiration from Oldworlder traditions of paying respect to the sea.
One report in particular adds to the popular legend of The Razzer actually being a protector rather than a predator: Ten cycles ago, in the thick of hostilities between Planets Thanged and Thunthen when supplies were desperately needed for the war effort following the attempted attack on Bainshaebo, workers at the Salt's pontoon drills worked feverishly to gather black water.
A worker lost his footing and nearly toppled backwards into the deep water, windmilling his arms futilely. His fellow workers moved to grab him only to catch the barest glimpse of something pale white reach out of the water and steady him, pushing him forward until he could grab a nearby strut. Before they could get a better look, it retracted under the waves quickly, leaving the workers baffled. The endangered worker described feeling something like a wide palm catching him in the small of his back and push him forward. Until his dying day the worker would tell the tale to all who would listen of how The Razzer saved him from falling off the platform and made frequent trips to leave offerings of food by the banks, leaving wooden stakes scrawled with gratitude. The stakes would never be disturbed, but the food pouches would often go missing.
This would give rise to the tradition of leaving food offerings, but not all food is taken. The Razzer seems to be very picky about what cuisine it will partake, or is actually very shy about all this new attention.

Historical Figures

Deres the Father of Metal

-Legendary uber-savant credited with ushering in new fields of technological advancement among the Thangien people.

Common Myths and Legends

Deres and The Razzer

Dramatization of Deres' attempted expedition into the Southern Salt.

Vthia's Tears

A teenaged Vthia is saved from assault by one of Yapign's lustful sons by the intervention of a Razzer.

Interspecies Relations and Assumptions

The Razzer has no known predators and no remains-slain or otherwise- have ever been found. Because of its habit for tampering with recording devices, interactions between other prominent species such as tree bears or Grand Crestas have never been observed. Humanoids traversing the Salt on foot are prone to being "razzed" at any time of the day.

Walls of Reeds by Mardrena

"I can't exactly say I've been 'razzed' before. There is so much to occupy my time in and around Bainshaebo with all the interesting goings on and such, and the logistics around organizing an expedition into the Salt is frankly mindboggling. I've interviewed everyone from Freelanders to Metraind, and details are far too consistent for this to be a hoax, especially after so many thousands of years..."

— Sarah Ann Goode, xenohistorian

Scientific Name

unknown

Origin/Ancestry

unknown

Lifespan

Indeterminate

Conservation Status

Unknown. No concrete specimen count available.

Average Height

Unknown

Average Weight

Unknown

Average Length

Unknown

Geographic Distribution

• The Southern Salt

The Razzer by Mardrena

"Is it a serpent? A shelled reptile like a Alligator Snapper or a Galapagos? Perhaps a living fossil like a plesiosaur? It might be neither, perhaps that innocent-looking face is a ploy to lure unsuspecting prey closer? If that's the case it doesn't seem to work very well given most 'victims' tend to be more alarmed than curious and quickly go the opposite way..."

— Sarah Ann Goode, xenohistorian