Session 10: Nomad's Reflection

The lights go out, the furniture comes to life, undead are everywhere, and the battle is on. Don't know whether to punch Lirelle or kiss her next time I see her. I know she had a hand in training Zora because I see a lot of how she fights in my daughter, but tonight, I know which is on my mind. Zora fights with a finesse and ferocity I've rarely scene, complimenting my every move and stacking behind me with utmost confidence. It's odd, but I feel more alive than ever taking on our foes together.
 
That's pretty much the theme of the fight as things escalate. We all answer as best as we know how, whether it's brawn or cunning. Magic or might. The dead keep coming, we keep putting them down. And divine power still flows through me to greater degrees that I can't explain but I'm no less grateful for. Sensing the presence of hated foes that are hidden from others. Smiting with searing radiance. As my friends battle around me, I move to where I'll make the biggest impact. Sometimes it's against a singular foe, sometimes against many. Doesn't matter. I'm not thinking anymore. I'm just acting. Reminds me of the past, long before I came to Faerun. So does the valor with which my companions fight and aid one another. Sadachbia with his healing, (still owe him a drink after this) Illidrex and Honorine with their precision, Angus and Atka with their strength. Kal with his arcana. Didn't see much of the imp, but I know he's there somewhere. When Illidrex erupts into radiant fury, I find a deeper layer of respect for him. We're not so different, that one and I. Our fights both internal and external reflect that.
 
Then Sadachbia is gone, and when he comes back nearly dead, there's two thoughts on my mind, no room for anything else. Get him safe. Show our enemy wrath. First one is easy. Second one not so much. Then Kal steps in, and I don't think I'll soon forget the gift he bestowed through his magic. Just for those few moments, I got to be my old self again. "Go all out," he tells me. I can do that. I was made for that. Especially against creatures of evil like the boneclaw that tried to kill a friend.
 
With the others beside me, there's not a doubt in my mind. This fight is decided. When it's done, wounded and weary though I am, though we all are, there's a familiar comfort that comes from knowing we stood against the darkness and won. I hope the others can feel that, though after our discussions, I'm not so sure. Illidrex and torture...I won't judge. I don't know what he went through but I know what went through. No one deserves that. Evil deserves wrath, retribution, even vengeance. But I won't commit the sin for which I know carries the sentence. I've done that enough. It saddens me to know others might have to learn from that folly the hard way like I did. Seems like Orion is on that path already, or has been. I know we have our differences, our perspectives on what was the best course for all of us, Orianna and Zora included. We may never agree. But I meant it when I said I was sorry. Not a day has gone by that I don't think about not being there for her when she passed. And now, for him when he went through whatever it was he went through.
 
I tried saving them from a fate like mine. That fate found them anyway. And I can't help but hate myself for it. For not doing enough. But I have to move on. Accept what is and move on. There's no changing the past, and my sympathy or self-loathing won't change that. Give them a better future. That, I can do.
 
Though I have to admit it's a lot harder now with Orion. He's working with the fuckers that are the cause of the darkness that's so pervasive in my life. The very ones that dragged me to Hell and turned me and so many others into the monstrosities we are. That corrupted some of the best and bravest I've ever known. So much pain, all because of them. All because of their evil.
His evil.
 
What the fuck is he thinking?
 
I pray to Torm he wakes up from his delusions soon. Before it's too late. Because Hell will find a way. It always finds a way. He always finds a way to win with even the slightest inch. But maybe that's why I'm here. Now, in this place, where fate has brought us back together. When Hell makes its move to seize him, to seize any of us, I'll be there. They won't end up like me. Their fate won't be mine.
 
I vow this to Torm himself.