A note In a Drawer

To my Friends
 
Hopefully you wont ever have to read this but I'm leaving this here in hopes it finds you all in the event of my passing. I've been feeling my control weakening in these passing months and I'm not sure what would happen if I were too lose control fully.
 
I should explain my self first. You see I was born outside the walls and was left at the doors of the Stone Abbey. They took me in and raised me. They tried at least. They didn't take to outsiders very well and that created complications. In the end I was cast out by a certain unsavory individual. Thinking back I don't know if anyone else knew what they had done or if they acted on their own accord.
 
I was left to wander with no sense of direction or means of gaining food or water. I got lost in the desert and my time was running out. That's when the voice came. They called themselves the Jester. It promised to get me out to keep me alive. I just had to agree . Which I did. What a stupid mistake. That's when the laughter started and it never stopped. I eventually got to Ioth I don't even remember how I got there. The first years were hard the Jester was relentless and would sometimes make me do things that didn't want to do.
 
But eventually I met all of you. So please if my fate ends here soon do not be sad. Do not blame yourselves or anyone else. Blame me for making an agreement with the Jester and Blame the Jester for taking advantage of a desperate child. I should have been lost a long time ago but you all saved me more times than you will ever know.
 
If any of you need a friend to talk just speak to me and I will be there listening always.
 
Your friend - Buta
 
till yth tafiaf tenamalo