Entry 4 - Goals Realized : But I Lost Everything

The End Of The Adventure
The city housed the Cult of Rhaes, deep underneath the catacombs. They've been using portals to get around. I decided in my infinite wisdom to head alone deep into the catacombs and assassinate the leader of the cult. There he was, to this day I'm haunted by his face. Caelum, an elderly man that I hurt a long time ago, that's now here waiting to enact his revenge on Yitoshk and I. His demons sniffed me out quickly, and as I ran away I was stabbed multiple times and thrown through the portals. I made my way to the church seeking to meet up with the party, but I blacked out soon. They rescued me, but... Yitoshk. I woke up in the pits of their ritual chamber, watching my only ally die to save me. Because of mistakes I made long ago. I tried to change the world, and failed. I tried to move on and pretend my emotions and connection to the world was gone, and failed. I tried to go in alone thinking I was unstoppable, and I failed. And someone I.. I cared about more than I ever admitted to myself, died. The words he left me are words I'll never forget. I'll live my life the way I used to, more compassionate, from now on.
 
My halo, my magic, my guardian spirit are all gone. My wings are nothing but bone. Black mist drifts off and out of my eyes and necrotic wings as if to shroud me from the pain I feel. The world is a better place, and hopefully so am I. But in the end I just keep thinking, why did it have to cost me everything.
Ashe is gone too, the only other person that I thought liked me. Thoughts of suicide linger in my mind every now and then.
If it wasn't for Yitoshk's sacrifice being in vain if I actually went through with it, then I might not be here to write this.
 
The willingness to move on and keep strong in the face of this horrible reality I call my life is gone.
In truth, the only thing I can do is pray to the patrons for forgiveness, and repent for my foolish actions.
 
Hopefully when the cold embrace of death grips me, I can find that salvation.