Adler Inc. at Eagle Pit

S7E4: May 23rd, 2053 - Eadi and Ehsi travel to Marquette County, Michigan, to learn about a very small yet important team of conservationists who protect wildlife from a particular danger created by a defunct mining operation. Of particular note, an MAI has been an integral part of the team for about 10 years since 2043, and the Adlers want to learn about the role she plays, the bonds between her and her coworkers, and unique ways in which she’s such a great fit for the team.
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[Video start - the camera pans from left to right across a relatively small lake that appears to be situated atop a hill. As it moves further to the right, a small cabin with a green roof enters the screen from off in the distance, and a large metal tower creeps into view from closer in the midground.]
Eadi Adler [wistfully]: It's a lovely spring day out here in the UP of Michigan - at least as lovely as it can be, when you're out visiting a lake full of corrosive toxins.
[The camera turns around quickly and focuses on Ehsi, who has his left side facing the POV.]
Ehsi Adler: And I've really gotta say, the breeze up here is phenomenal. If you're not a migratory bird trying to come in for a landing, of course. In cases such as that -
[He points to somewhere above and behind the camera, which dutifully follows to focus in on a small flock of birds that appears to be approaching the water. As they descend to only about 30 feet from its surface, a loud, echoing BOOM is heard nearby, and the flock quickly ascends again.]
Ehsi: - Admission is denied.
Eadi: And while that seems like a bit of a prick move, it's really just business as usual for the team that works here.
[The camera proceeds to pan again to the tower mentioned earlier - one of the staff is there with an air cannon, and they wave down to Eadi and Ehsi. It then turns to focus on Eadi's face.]
Eadi: Speaking of which, I think it's about time we get back down this hill to base camp, so we can start with some proper introductions, what say you?
[Eadi returns the camera to aiming at Ehsi, who now wears an expression that can be best described as mild shock or dismay. His hands appear as though he was gesturing a moment ago, but are now frozen at his sides.]
Ehsi [Peeved]: Eadi, it took me an hour to get up this hill. I thought we were going to record more than the intro before we went back down.
Eadi: What? No, we were just going to do the intro and set up some cameras for static shots later. I thought we discussed-
[There's a brief clatter as Eadi sets the camera down and starts driving toward Ehsi. They're audibly starting to raise their voices at one another but the recording isn't able to pick it up as well as before due to the distance. Ehsi should still be audible by this point on account of having his own microphone, but as his voice begins to behave similarly on the recording, it becomes apparent that this is some sort of intentional editing decision.]
[Suddenly, the camera cuts out, and it returns with both MAI parked at the base camp. Eadi is as chipper as ever, but Ehsi seems to be mildly bothered by something. Ah, whatever could it be. Regardless, he jumps right back into character upon the start of the recording.]
Ehsi [Formal]: This here is the center of Eagle Pit's base camp - once upon a time, this place was bustling with the employee base of an active copper mining operation. Back in 2040, however, the location was shuttered as the parent company filed for bankruptcy - as well as the area ultimately being stripped of any significant remaining copper veins. Although there wasn't enough copper left to be considered worth sticking around for, there was still enough remaining in the soil that - once disturbed by its extraction to the surface, began to leech into the surrounding environment. Namely, the central lake that we'd just paid a visit to.
Eadi: Precisely, and it's the high concentrations of copper leeching into that lake that make it so dangerous, and why it's imperative that wildlife be kept away from it. Just scaring birds and other small animals away from a lake might sound easy enough on paper, but just like is characteristic with humans, repetitive stimuli can eventually be tuned out by the brain - using the same old tactics every time can slowly lose its effectiveness.
Ehsi: And that's why now, over 30 years after its closure, a dedicated team still remains whose express goal... is to find creative ways to scare the living daylights out of a few birds and other animals every day, so they don't get heavy metal poisoning.
Eadi [In jest]: Sounds invigorating, truly.
Ehsi: You don't sound very invigorated.
Eadi: What? No, this is absolutely my excited voice- actually no you've got me. Frankly I'd rather be-
Ehsi [Hastily]: Wait shh - shush you can't be talking like that, they're right there.
[The camera turns around, and a group of uniformed people are somewhat awkwardly standing together as if waiting for their que. There's two humans, a screen-faced LAI, an E-20 unit, and a large truck LAI. One of the humans is crouched down to the ground and is drawing in the dirt with a stick - and the LAI waves at the camera.]

Eadi: ah, shit - Hello! Thank you for inviting us out here today, truly - we've heard you've got a lot set up to show to us?
[The group seems to visibly relax at this point, and a few begin to walk toward Eadi and Ehsi. Likewise, the two MAI move to close the distance. The camera angles slightly downward as Eadi gets closer to the humans - oh right, he's quite tall.]
Human 1: Absolutely; it's a pleasure to have you two here. [He then extends a hand, and Eadi reaches out to shake it - his hand is nearly three times the size of the human's.] We have quite a few things, actually, if you want to follow us over to the little display we got set up today.
Ehsi [Idly, from out of frame]: Oh yeah, absolutely; lead the way.
[The group starts to make their way over to another part of the base camp. As they go, they pass by a few notable structures including what appears to be a large outdoor bird enclosure and a storage shed.]
Eadi: With the brief saunter over, we might as well get some introductions in, yeah?
Human 1: Yeah of course! I'm Benji - I guess I'm sort of the informal head of the team, but this isn't exactly the kind of job that needs a strict hierarchy. We don't worry about titles too much.
[The camera angles to the right and back slightly, to get the rest of their team walking at Eadi's side into frame.]
Human 2: I'm Leta! Yeah, like he said we don’t sweat the titles or sticking to any particular roles, but I’m usually the one that does the bulk of animal care if we find any critters that slipped under our radar in the area. Ehsi: Oh yes, I imagine that’s quite important.
Leta: Hard to keep track of every single living thing that tries to sneak in, sadly. The next best thing is to take care of any that do wind up getting injured.
Eadi: I can only assume it’s very fulfilling getting to see them improve under your care, though?
Leta: Oh yeah, definitely! A lot of them are cute little guys too, especially when they’re really starting to feel better. Being able to release them again is probably the best part, though - a few miles away from the lake, to be clear.
Eadi: Ah, evidently, yes.
Ehsi: That does sound quite nice. Anyone else care to intro while we’re still going?
Pameko LAI: Yeah, why not - I’m Cavis; I usually take it upon myself to keep track of work inventory so we’re never running short on any supplies. I also usually commit to the graveyard shift for lake-watch so the squishies can keep up a normal sleep schedule. [He displays a feigned toothy grin upon finishing his last comment.]
Benji: You sure do, because you love us, eh?
Cavis: Whatever makes you feel better, keep saying that. I get all the best views of the night sky, and you two always miss it since you have to get up early - right, Drum?
LTMV Truck: For sure, for sure; [Goodness, that’s a thick Midwest accent] that’s when all the interesting animals come out, too. It keeps us real busy.
Eadi: Drum - now that’s a delightful true-gen name right there - what do you do here mostly?
Drum: Take a quick glance, and I’ll give you three guesses.
Ehsi: Ah, let me guess, do you help Leta with the baby animals?
[Drum let out a brief but loud laugh at this comment, and she reached out one of her utility arms to shake Ehsi at the shoulder of his own drive-along.]
Drum: Hah! Obviously, I’ve got the delicate hands of a surgeon - you’ve got a keen eye. But nah, I’m mostly hauling equipment; either between the base camp and the lake, or if we ever have to get anything in town on short notice.
Ehsi: Bugger, I was close - well, nothing wrong with that! You’d be pressed to find any job that doesn’t have at least one great truck somewhere in the mix.
Drum: Pressed? I’d say more like impossible.
E-20: You’ve got that right! [They up their pace for a moment to enter the frame of the camera, and their pupil noticeably twitches a few times as their own primary lens fixes onto it.]
Eadi: Oh yeah, you’ve been a little quiet thus far, what’s your role?
E-20: I have, haven’t I? I’m Lucy - my main deal is mostly being one of the deterrents, actually - I get to have a good run around the lake while I’m at it, too.
Benji: Lucy, yeah, short for Lucifer. We ordered her a few years ago as a deterrent, since we thought getting a living breathing dog might be a bit of an unnecessary risk. Either in the event they’d wade into the lake or steal a drink out of it, or get a little too rough with the animals they were supposed to just chase away. Much easier to have a dog you can actually discuss the details with.
Lucy: And I do a good job at it!
Cavis: She’s a real devil sometimes, but that’s way more toward us than the wildlife.
Eadi: I’d say that’s a quite fitting name for the average E-20, really - I’ll give you that.
Lucy: Stay on my good side, lest I ever decide to live up to the name with you. [Her pupil dilated and she relaxed her attached jaw, analogous to a grin.] Anywho, we’re here!
[Lucy hopped into a sort of canter-like pace, and the camera followed as she sped ahead of the group toward a rack full of equipment - evidently just moved out into the open for the sake of demonstration.]
Ehsi: Well you’ve certainly got a broad collection going here, lots of interesting gadgets in the mix, too.
Leta: And we use it all!
[Leta jogs after Lucy, and grabs an odd, bulky, and vaguely gun-looking device that was leaning on the side of the rack. While this is happening, the camera shakes for a moment and some shuffling can be heard, after which Eadi drives into view of the camera - it’s now resting on its own tripod.]
Eadi: Hey! We saw one of these earlier, right?
Leta: Right! You did, eh? This is one of our air cannons - probably one of the most common tools we use since it’s quick to grab, doesn’t require any set-up, and does a pretty good job spooking anything we need it to. Here - you can hold it!
[Eadi drives up to the rack in the left of the camera’s frame, then he turns around and cuts his engine. Leta then walks up to him with the air cannon, and lets him pick it up with one hand.]
Eadi: Oh it feels quite nice, actually; I thought it’d be a tad awkward to handle but it’s very well balanced. [He turns it over in his hands twice, examining it.] Do you mind if I fire it?
Leta [Shrugging]: I don’t see why not, just shoots air, anyways.
Eadi: Yeah certainly…
[He engages the cannon and looks around for a moment as if deliberating where to aim it - then with hardly any prior notice, he fires it directly at Ehsi’s nose.]
Ehsi: AH! HEY! [His hand shoots upward to cover the front of his pitot tube.] That feels weird!
Eadi: I assumed as much!
Ehsi: Yeah, and you know I’m gonna have to get back at you for that now.
Eadi: I’ve already come to terms with my fate, s’why it took me a second to do it.
[Leta awkwardly rushes over to grab the air cannon out from Eadi’s hands - he surrenders it without protest - truly, the damage is already done.]
Leta [Hastily]: Yeah glad you had fun with that - anyways! [She rests the cannon back in it’s original spot, and grabs a length of what appears to be a form of barbed wire.] Next item! Bird spikes!
Ehsi: Oh, thank you - bird spikes? Aren’t those considered a little antiquated for unnecessary cruelty?
Lucy: Not when the alternative’s worse.
Leta: Yeah, exactly; of course it gives any birds trying to land on our buildings and structures a rude little poke, but - most of the time - it keeps them away from the lake pretty well. Even just having the opportunity to rest close by can encourage some to try and stick around, which we obviously don’t want.
[Ehsi puts his hands out, and Leta drapes the long loop of bird spikes over them.]
Ehsi: Huh, I haven’t seen any of this stuff up close in a long time - not that it’s changed much. Say, with the size of this loop, it kinda looks like a me-sized feather boa, doesn’t it?
[He playfully lifted the loop in front of his head, but kept it a good few feet away from actually contacting anything.]
Leta: Hah, it kinda does!
Benji: Don’t get too excited and scratch your paint now - we’d rather not pay for it. [He enters the camera frame from the right side.]
Ehsi: Oh ‘course, I’d rather not risk it regardless.
[Ehsi carefully hands off the large coil of bird spike to Benji, who returns it to the rack and swaps it out with two small, boxy items reminiscent of old style boomboxes.]
Benji: So far we’ve just shown you some pretty direct ways for keeping the birds at bay, but these things are more like - psychological warfare.
Eadi: You’re using psychological warfare on the birds?
Benji: Psychological warfare.
Ehsi: That’s fascinating.
Benji: Indeed - these things are what’re called sonic repellents. These ones specifically mimic the sounds of birds in distress, which - naturally - other birds want to steer clear from.
Eadi: Oh, you really weren’t lying.
Benji: They’re not always the most effective tool we have, but they’re a lot easier to set up than physical repellants like the bird spikes. They also work better than the other type of sound repellents that are “ultrasonic.” Come in a little, I’ll let you in on a secret about those.
[Eadi, with his engine cut off, only turns his turret to face Benji, while Ehsi does drive a little bit closer. The camera zooms in focus on mostly Benji and Ehsi.]
Benji: Those ultrasonic ones don’t actually work like advertised, most of the time.
[Both Eadi and Ehsi let out a dramaticized gasp at this.]
Benji: While humans have a hearing range of about 20 - 20kHz, the average bird can only hear in the range of about 1kHz - 4kHz… up to 10, if you’re lucky. That means most of the birds that people try to repel can’t even hear the things in the first place.
Ehsi [Incredulous]: That’s diabolical.
Eadi: They’ve played the public like fiddles truly.
[The camera zooms in to focus primarily on Benji’s face, and he then proceeds to grin and wink at the camera.]
Benji: The more you know - about bird repellents.
[The camera zooms out once again to where it was at the beginning of the equipment demonstration, and Cavis walks into frame from the left, past Eadi.]
Cavis: Everyone else here can be so kind as to show you the rest of the gadgets, but do you two want to meet the falcons?
[Upon hearing this question, the eyes of both MAI trained themselves upon Cavis with such intent that it looked borderline predacious, like two saucer-eyed cats that’d just caught sight of a mouse.]
Ehsi: You have falcons?
Eadi [Eagerly]: YES PLEASE.
[Cavis froze for about two seconds, with wide eyes on his screen and his arms in a sort of defensive position.]
Cavis: …Right! You guys like birds, huh?
Ehsi: Seeing as I’m basically a giant man-made bird, I figure I’ve got a lot in common with the little guys.
Eadi: YES. [He’s shaking both his fists in unison now.]
Cavis: Then I’ll get the birds!
[Cavis finger guns to the left of the screen, then a moment later trots off in the direction he’d previously come from.]
Leta: Well, he shouldn’t take too long - rest of this stuff is pretty lackluster compared to the falcons anyways, I’ll admit to that - THINK FAST!
[She grabs two tape-roll looking items from the rack, and throws them at Eadi and Ehsi with some decent force. Both MAI catch them with little difficulty or fanfare.]
Leta [Mildly dejected]: Oh right; that’s kinda part of your whole deal.
Eadi: Yeah we’re a little quick like that - so what are these?
Leta: Just another passive sort of repellent that’s meant to be visibly jarring. It’s a highly reflective tape that we lay out on some surfaces that - of course, shines into the eyes of nearly anything approaching - and it’s supposed to be quite annoying.
[Ehsi pulls a small stretch of tape out from its roll, and angles it to and fro in the light - his irises and pupils narrow somewhat as he scrutinizes it.]
Ehsi: I can see how it’d make a little animal miff their target, yeah - reflects quite brightly when you get it at the correct angle.
Eadi: Would it work on you?
Ehsi: I can fly just fine with my eyes closed, mate.
Eadi: That’s a good point.
Ehsi: Yeah, I’d say - here you go.
[Ehsi hands his reflective tape roll back to Leta, and Eadi follows suit shortly after.]
Ehsi: So I’m real curious now about the last thing on the rack there - you’ve got some gallon jugs that say ‘liquid bird repellent’ on the front, what’s with those?
Benji: Exactly what it says - it’s another surface repellent, like the spikes, but less pokey and more just annoying and icky feeling to the birds. You slather the stuff on whichever surface you want to keep them away from, and if any roosting birds try to land on it, it gets all on their feet and it makes it feel unpleasant to walk on the surface with the repellent.
Eadi: How well does that work in your specific scenario? I feel like if I were a little bird and got that stuff on my feet, I’d want to rinse it off right away, and, well- [Eadi gestured with a hand toward the lake.]
Benji: That’s why we showed it to you last, we hardly use the stuff. [Benji snorted a chuckle.] We bought a bunch of it a while back thinking it was a good harmless repellent, but we stopped using it quick when it made a few birds try to make a bee-line for the lake right after standing in it.
Eadi [Thoughtfully]: Net zero information gained from this one, really.
Benji: We figured the folks at home would at least like the option presented for their own use, eh?
Ehsi: What, are you trying to sell it? [Ehsi’s visible optics pushed up into a grin.]
Benji: Well, we could! Thanks for the suggestion!
[Right after Benji finished speaking, Eadi’s eyes suddenly widened, and he reached across the top of the equipment rack to grab Ehsi’s closest arm to jostle it.]
Eadi [Pupils constricted]: Aye - Ehsi, look look!
[Ehsi glances at Eadi’s hand for a moment, but then quickly looks to an area past the camera and his eyes do the same as Eadi’s.]
Cavis [From out of frame]: I’ve got the stars of the show coming out here now, just a moment.
[The camera spins around to train onto Cavis as he approaches. He’s wearing thick leather gloves on both hands that extend almost to his elbows, and has a sizable bird of prey perched on each side. Both birds are wearing hawk hoods and seem generally relaxed in posture.]
Eadi: Yes!! Yes yes yes! [He’s pumping his fists again.] Stretches from August 11th, 1990 to June 19th, 2000, striving to encompass all major events.
[The camera stays fixed upon Cavis as he walks back to where the rest of the group is, and eventually rotates back into its original orientation.]
Eadi: Oh, they’re just absolute beauties, both of them.
Ehsi: What are their names? I don’t believe you mentioned earlier.
Cavis: Ah right, of course. [He raises his left arm slightly.] This one is Wyatt, he’s about nine years old at this point given when we got him, right?
Drum: We got him back on April 5th in 2065 as a fledgeling, so that’s about right, yeah.
Cavis: Ah yeah, spot on.
Ehsi: You mention that you got him as a fledgeling, is there any particular reason or story behind that?
Drum [Thoughtfully]: He came to us from a local wildlife rehab, actually. He was surrendered at a few weeks old by someone in the area that found him, but apparently they had him for a few months for one reason or another and hand-reared him; that made him too friendly with people and hampered his hunting skills, so they couldn’t release him back into the wild.
Leta: So we got him! We worked with a falconer that lives not too far from here to get his hunting skills sharpened up and to train us how to handle him. So his hunting skills are sharp as a knife - still real friendly though.
Eadi: Oh, interesting! Guess that’s a lesson for the viewers to not try… hand-rearing a bird of prey at home, though.
Cavis: Oh hell no, they’d make terrible house pets; as if that had to be said at all.
[Cavis, still dual wielding birds, marched up to the camera and extended both arms with a jesting grin.]
Cavis: You see these? You don’t want these! Get pigeons, or chickens, or something!
[Cavis backs up and returns to the spot he was previously standing in.]
Ehsi: So we’ve got Wyatt introduced, who’s on the other arm?
Cavis: On the other arm we’ve got Willow, and she’s about fifteen years old now. [He raises his right arm slightly.] We’ve actually only had her for about six years, because we received her from a falconer that was departing from the hobby for personal reasons.
Ehsi: Wyatt and Willow; that’s not intentional, is it?
Cavis: It’s actually not! Just a funny coincidence that they both had ‘W’ names when we got them.
Ehsi: Well, what else can you tell us and the folks at home about the two of them?
Cavis: Well, Wyatt and Willow are both red-tailed hawks. Specifically eastern red-tails, which are native to this area along with other subspecies that are widespread across the Americas. If you’ve ever seen a big reddish brown hawk perched on a powerline or in a tree and you live somewhere in America, chances are good it was one of these guys!
Eadi: Ah, that’s fascinating. Do you have anything to show us with them?
Cavis: As a matter of fact I do, can you hold Wyatt real quick?
Eadi: Wait - me?
Cavis: Yeah! Here, I’ve got an extra glove in case you’re worried about his talons scratching anything.
[Cavis raises his arm slightly in a manner that causes Wyatt to step a little further up toward his shoulder, and unclasps a large glove from one of his belt loops. He hands it over to Eadi, and Eadi slips it on - fits… like a glove, it must be fitted for Drum to use.]
Cavis: Alright, aaand… [in a slightly higher, gentler tone] Wyatt jump!
[Wyatt readily hops from Cavis’s glove and onto Eadi’s - Eadi looks like he is trying not to explode.]
Eadi: Ehsi, look!
[Eadi lifts his arm up a little, and Wyatt opens his wings slightly and lifts one foot to stabilize momentarily.]
Eadi: I’m connecting with your ancestors - I’m gonna be a bird-whisperer soon, I know it.
Ehsi [With sarcasm]: Oh yeah, he looks right comfortable there.
Eadi: He does, though!
[Cavis maneuvers the glove off of his now free hand, clips it back to his belt loop, then reaches into a small pouch fastened on another part of his belt.]
Cavis: Lemme give him this real quick too, we like giving them treats for listening.
[He pulls a small cut of meat from the pouch and tosses it to Wyatt, who catches it without issue - Willow spots it, and stamps her feet and chirps.]
Cavis: Hey, you get yours in a second! I’m gonna have her do a demonstration first.
Leta: You want me to grab any targets from the shed for her?
Cavis: Nah, nothing too crazy.
[He turns to look back at Ehsi, then toward his utility arms.]
Cavis: Ehsi, can you make a big diamond shape with your hands real quick?
Ehsi: Ah yeah, sure - like this?
[Ehsi positions his hands as instructed, there’s approximately a square foot of space in the middle.]
Cavis: Yeah, and raise them up a few feet higher.
[Ehsi complies accordingly.]
Ehsi: So what is this for, some kind of hand signal - ? Woah!
[Cavis whistles, and Willow takes off from her place on his glove. For a moment she’s off-screen, and Eadi visibly realizes he should probably have the camera follow after her. After a second, the camera quickly turns to focus on Willow as she continues to ascend.]
Cavis: Just keep your hands right there, this is a neat trick she learned when she spent a few years as an animal ambassador with her last owner.
Eadi: Oh, really? She has a diverse bit of experience under her belt, then.
[Willow levels off for a moment at a good distance away from the group. She then begins to circle back around, she slightly tucks in her wings, and begins to descend back toward them - namely toward Ehsi.]
Cavis: Just hold steady now, she’s gonna fly through the gap in your hands!
Ehsi: Ah, alright! Here she comes!
[The camera returns to focusing on Ehsi with his hands in the middle of the frame, just in time to catch Willow darting between them with impressive speed.]
Ehsi [Giddy]: Absolutely fantastic! [He claps a few times, and returns his hands to a resting position.]
Eadi: Really, that’s impressive!
Cavis: And it’s only half something that she needs to be taught. It’s well within her instincts and skills as a bird of prey to be able to duck, weave, and curl around obstacles in order to have the greatest possible speed advantage on whatever she’s hunting.
Leta: That’s exactly what makes them so good to have around the pit! Well - minus the part about actually catching what we have them chase.
Cavis: We make sure they’re always well fed before a job, so it’s pretty rare they take any real hunting interest in the other birds.
Leta: Yeah, that!
Eadi: I see, yeah I’d imagine you don’t want them getting any real interest in - ah!
[Eadi freezes momentarily as Wyatt suddenly rears his head higher and vigorously flaps his wings for a few seconds. After a moment, however, he tucks his wings back to his sides and calms down again.]

Ehsi: What, did Wyatt not tell you he was going to readjust his wings? I thought you were turning into a bird whisperer.
Eadi: That takes time! It’s obviously not a one day process!
Ehsi: Yes, of course, of course.
[As the two exchange comments, Cavis idly lifts up his arm and Willow swoops back into frame to perch on his glove. He takes a piece of meat from his side pouch, and gives it to her.]
Cavis: Anyways, you wanna get Wyatt’s signature trick now? His is a lot more tame than Willow’s, but it’s a fan favorite when we get visitors.
Leta: Oh yes! You guys are gonna love this!
Eadi: Oh really, what does he do?
Cavis: Bring your arm over this way a little bit so he’s closer to me?
[Eadi obliges, and as he extends his arm over, Wyatt takes a few steps closer to his hand toward Cavis.]
Cavis: Now get a load of this.
[Cavis pulls yet another piece of meat from the side pouch, and holds it up while staying mindful to straighten his other arm so Willow isn’t within snatching distance of it.]
Cavis: Wyatt, do you wanna sing?
[Wyatt’s eyes quickly lock onto the sliver of meat in Cavis’ hand, and stamps his feet a few times - and upon hearing the command, he lets out a loud, high pitched screech.]
Cavis: Good boy! Here you go! [He tosses the meat, and Wyatt catches it again with little issue.]
Eadi: Woah! I wasn’t expecting that!
Leta: Did that sound familiar at all? It’s a pretty well known sound on this side of the pond.
Ehsi: Ah right, it did - isn’t that cry usually attributed to bald eagles?
Leta: Yep! If I recall correctly, Hollywood didn’t think the bald eagle’s actual cry sounded “cool” enough, or something, so instead they used the cry of the red tailed hawk to voice act for them.
Drum [Interjecting jokingly]: Stolen valor! I don’t get why we didn’t just make the red tailed hawk the national bird - they’re way more common to see for the average person than the eagles, anyways.
Lucy [Out of frame]: I think whoever decided that just thought that they looked cooler, or something - bigger and they have cool color distribution.
Drum: Ah, so vain of them; thinking about looks before anything else.
[Some shuffling noises from out of frame - then Lucy’s head pops up from below the camera’s view. She’s considerably closer to the camera than the rest of the group.]
Lucy: Well, back then it’s not like it was easy to record sound. I see why they picked for looks since a lot of peoples’ first impressions would be - what, paintings? Drawings?
Drum: You do have a point there.
Cavis: Yeah enough about eagles - this isn’t about them!
Lucy: Well Leta brought it up, we were just expanding on that.
Cavis: Leta, enough about eagles!
Lucy: Yeah!
Leta: I didn’t even say more than one sentence about them!?
Lucy: Enough about eagles!
Leta: Fine! [She crosses her arms with an exaggerated huff.] [There is a brief silence among the group - the recorder begins to pick up the low rumble of the present MAIs’ engines.]
Ehsi: Well, I must say it was certainly a lovely experience getting to meet your personal flying friends. I’m sure they’ve probably met their socialization quota for the day, however!
[Eadi shoots a brief glare at Ehsi.]
Eadi: What, you’re just going to insist that they go back already? We were just getting familiar with each other!
Ehsi: I’m sure the hawks absolutely love the social atmosphere right now.
Eadi: Good point.
Cavis: Yeah you’re right, I figure these guys have probably had their excitement at least for now in that case, I’ll be bringing them back to their enclosure - you all get comfortable again in the meantime.
[Cavis looks back at the group with a smirk, before strolling offscreen with his dual-wielded hawks.]

Eadi [Ponderously]: I think we got really distracted by the hawks - we got really derailed for a few minutes there didn’t we. This episode was supposed to be about you, Drum. [Eadi then turns to look at Drum with a somewhat half apologetic, half trance-broken look.]
Drum: Wyatt and Willow tend to have that effect on people, I think.
Lucy: It simply couldn’t have been helped.

Eadi: Yeah, you’re right, you’re right - anyways, I guess this gives us the opportunity to get into some of the questions we actually came here today to ask! So; mostly directed toward Drum, but the rest of you lot are relevant to most of them so you can chime in if you feel like it.

Drum: Aight, shoot. [Drum relaxes her suspension with an audible hiss.]
Eadi: So, in line with the theme of the series - you’re of course a True Generation MAI. For the folks at home, what’s your model, and what was your position while you were in service?
Drum: Ah, startin’ with an easy one. [She brings up a utility arm and points to herself.] I’m a model of tactical vehicle called an LMTV - or light medium tactical vehicle, specific variant being an M1078 for the people who are into the fine details. Myself and trucks like me were used pretty extensively over the full 10 years of the war for a lot of different things, but I mostly hauled cargo - and troops once in a while, if they needed me to.
Ehsi: So I imagine that means you were among the lot that didn’t see a lot of active fighting, or at least weren’t an active participant.
Drum: Active participant in the combat? Not at all. Didn’t experience much? I beg to differ - I never fired any of my own shots, but that didn’t stop any Easterners from tryin’ to start fights anyways.
[Drum reversed away from the group for a moment, then drove forward again to reorient herself at an angle to the camera. She then began pointing at various parts of her chassis.]
Drum: Bullets. Bullets. Shrapnel. Bullets. Bullets - I could do that for a long time - I won’t bore y’all with the details, but we got shot at a lot. We carried a lot of important stuff, y’know! Taking out a cargo truck could do a lot to starve out troops or keep their munitions out of reach.
Ehsi: You’ve certainly got a point there - anyone would be pressed to find an individual back then who didn’t have an important role to play out in the field.
Eadi: Which means that for both sides, it was all the more important to hit the other where it would really hurt them - access to supplies can really make or break any army, no matter how big they are. So - you were a cargo truck, clearly made it through to June of 2000 and all the way to where we are now - and you’ve picked this pretty niche line of work. How’d you find out about this job, why’d you take it?
Leta: Oh I can answer that first half - she came to us after seeing us do a conservation presentation at a local community park. She was working event-catering before applying with us.
Drum: Yeah, can’t say I was a fan of that - it paid rent though. If I had to say a reason that I singled it out, though, hm… I don’t know, I guess I’m more concerned than the average citizen about the welfare of wild animals? Everyone cares, of course. I just thought it was compelling enough to drop my other job to get more involved.
Eadi: I’d say that’s a plenty respectable answer, huh?
Drum [Thoughtfully]: Suppose so. I also wanted to get into a more tight-knit social group. The last job definitely had me working with plenty of people, but with how the contracting gig was set up, the teams weren’t very consistent which I didn’t like.
Benji: Well, it doesn’t get too much more tight knit than this - just a few guys all stuck hanging around a corrosive lake all day.
Eadi: Guys and gals?
Lucy: We don’t really care about the singling out, we’re all just fellas here right?
Drum: Oh, yeah, save the formalities; we all do the same shit here anyways.
Ehsi: Hey! That actually leads into the next question. We already got the basic run-down of what everyone does here - yourself included - but we wanted to take the opportunity to get more specific with you in particular. So, what kinds of things do you do around here on a normal day?
Eadi [Interjecting]: Or an unusual day, even, if you have any fun stories to share on that front.
Ehsi: Ah yeah, unusual is fun, too.
Drum: Supply runs are the bulk of the proper labor I do around here, so some things never change. Besides that, the work is pretty lax. I like keeping the night watch in alternating shifts with Cavis, which from what I’ve noticed actually tends to be a fair amount more eventful than the day shifts - [Her optics dart to glance at Leta and Benji.] - Hear that? Bots still doing the heavy lifting!
Leta [Sarcastically]: Oh, how can we ever repay you?
[Leta leans forward onto the equipment rack, one arm bracing herself on the top and the other arm dramatically laid across her forehead.]
Leta: Hark, I don’t think my frail little squishy body would be able to stand up to the cold or stay awake after dark.
Benji: Yeah, real grateful for you two getting all the best sunrise views while our brains clean themselves out.
Drum: Oh, no need to thank me - it’s only the fair thing - what, with having no circadian rhythm.
[The three of them spent a good few seconds standing around and batting their eyelashes at one another, before Drum blinked and peeled her focus away - Benji and Leta snickered.]
Drum: Anyways. On a usual day it’s pretty much just keepin’ watch over the pit and using - almost - everything we showed off on the rack to keep animals off; straightforward enough. For just me though besides the supply runs, I also keep the roads around the camp in decent shape, mostly for my own quality of life. The rest of the gang have their own side-by-side to drive around with, but half the time they just hitch rides with me anyways.
Benji: The side-by-side is fun and all, but when you get used to your ride talking back to you and doing all the driving, it’s kinda dull in comparison.
Leta: Yeah, Drum can go over rougher terrain than it, too. [She grinned.] Oh - they asked about weird days too, didn’t they? You should talk about that one deer.
Benji: Which deer - ? OH THAT DEER.
Eadi: What kind of deer?
Drum: Aye right, yeah, one time we had a buck visit the lake that had six legs.
Ehsi: Six?
Eadi: A mutant deer?!
[Ehsi tilted his fuselage toward the truck, eyes wide and pupils constricted. Eadi leaned his hull over as well with a similar expression.]
Drum: Okay well - it’s less of a story and more just a crazy encounter - we had to scare ‘im off the water just like any other animal, but Leta and I managed to snap a fair amount of pictures of ‘im before we had to shoot the air cannon a few times.
Eadi: Well you can’t just tell us about the pictures and not show us any of them, do you have any handy?
Drum: S’pose I might have one of them that Leta printed off… Just a moment.
[Drum brought up a utility arm and started rifling around in her own cab. After a moment, she pulled it out from her window and procured a small photo - likely a typical 5x7”.]
Drum: Yeah, here it is - take a look.
[She holds the photo out - Leta and Benji crowd in to get a look at it, while Eadi, Ehsi, and the rest of the LAI just move to spots where it’s within eyeshot.]

Ehsi: Ah wow, it really does just have two extra legs on the front there.
Eadi: That’s a pretty big buck, too! They must not get in the way enough to hinder anything - can you turn it around for a minute?
Drum: Sure, here.
[She flips the photo around to face the camera, and it promptly zooms in until the image takes up the whole screen. It’s a shot of the lake - about 25ft from the shore is the buck, and it’s a mostly average looking six-point save for the additional set of front legs sprouting from its chest.]
Eadi: So did you ever find out why it’s like that?
Leta: Yeah, we got into contact with the local fish and wildlife to try and track it down to check up on it, and they did end up finding him. They said they’re pretty certain it’s some kind of parasitic twin - got absorbed in the womb, or something.
Benji: They just let him go like that, too; figured that if he made it long enough to have a solid set of antlers that the extra legs weren’t bothering him at all.
Ehsi: Oh that’s quite cool, good for him I suppose!
Drum: Yeah, I do hope he’s still having an okay time out there; we haven’t seen ‘im since these pictures were taken, and that was - what, three years ago?
[As Drum is speaking, the camera zooms out and away from the picture until it returns to its original framing, and Eadi motions that she can pocket the picture now.]
Leta: That sounds about right.
Lucy [Confused]: Drum, you know how long ago it was - ?
Drum: Force of habit to ask.
Ehsi: Ah yeah, been there.
Eadi: Happens to the best of us - speaking of human-caused behaviors - that sorta smoothly leads into the next question we had for you and the gang. Basically the whole point of the series, you and both your human and mechanical friends alike all seem to have a pretty close sense of camaraderie among one another. Anyone want to take the opportunity to be sappy and philosophical about that?
Drum: Sappy and philosophical… I’on think it’s that deep. [She chuckles.] I mean, we all get along well enough, we’re good friends, and I value that a lot. I had friends before coming here, but besides the guys that’ve been with me from the beginning, none of them ever bothered to get to know me as well as these guys have.
Leta [Interjecting]: And what’s not sappy about that?
Drum: You guys are just good friends!
Benji [Leaning in]: Nah, we all love each other here, right?
[At this point, Cavis walks back into frame and regroups with everyone. He sits down on the ground, and inspects a small spot on his shirt - might be meat juice from feeding the hawks earlier.]
Cavis: What are we doing now, being sappy?
Leta: See, even Cavis knows what’s up and they weren’t even here.
Drum: He clearly just overheard us talking from over there.
Cavis [Bluntly]: Yeah I did.
Drum: See?
[Benji waves a hand, and the group quiets for a moment.]
Benji: Alright fine, if you don’t want to get deep about anything then I will. [He walks around to the front of the equipment rack where Cavis is, and sits down beside them cross-legged.]
Benji: Drum was the first MAI I’d ever properly met, and by that I mean actually got to know. Before that, I’d seen a few, talked to a few, but if I’m being honest I was sorta scared of them for a while - no offense - like I said I just never had the chance to really know any before.
Eadi: That’s a pretty common initial response, to be fair.
Ehsi: What sort of things scared you specifically? I’ve noticed the answers seem to vary a lot from person to person - I just think it’s interesting.
Benji [Thoughtfully]: I just thought you guys were uncanny, to be honest. My parents raised me religious - even if it didn’t end up sticking too well - but they held a pretty strong sentiment that MAI were unnatural.
Eadi: Okay, again, fair. We’re not really natural in many senses of the word.
Benji: Yeah, well, they thought MAI were “insulting to God’s creations,” or whatever, since you’re all robots that “act” like people.
Eadi: Hold up - pause for a second.
[Eadi starts making a ‘come here’ motion with his hand, and the camera zooms in slightly toward him. He then extends his flat palm in a ‘stop’ signal, and the camera stops zooming.]
Eadi: I’m sorry, they said what? [His voice feigns a crack, as if he’s trying to stop himself from cry-laughing.]
[The camera pans over to Benji - who at this point looks like he’s undergoing the same duress.]
Benji: Honest to shit, they really said that!
Eadi: WOW, that is - I just haven’t heard that one in a WHILE. I’m not saying that I don’t understand why there’s people who say it, but it’s bloody wild being reminded that it used to be a sentiment held by so many.
Ehsi: It wasn’t even that long ago that it was so common - when we were kids?
Eadi: Ah yeah, back in the 2010’s, 2020’s, you’ve got a point.
Drum: That’s about when people started really fighting back against those sentiments, too - I think in retrospect it’s considered pretty impressive how much public perception changed.
Ehsi: Ah, right, you already had a few years under your belt when that started?
Drum: Yep. I was born in ‘96, so I was in my teens when that first attack happened. I was never directly affected, but I have a friend who had a pretty scary run-in back in 2025. Y’know, back to before though - I did actually get to meet Benji’s parents once - they weren’t that bad.
Benji: Oh I was gonna add that when I had the chance, yeah. I really believe they just weren’t sure what to think before, either, just with a deal more of fear involved. Hell of a lot of people drop their problems with strangers when they just get to talk to each other normally, I’ve heard.
Eadi: That’s quite sweet, actually! Also along what’s basically the same sentiment behind what we’re doing here now, [Wistfully] just all getting to know one another in a laid back setting.
Ehsi: S’what it’s all about!
Eadi: Also - god - you were trying to say something nice earlier and we started talking about all that. Did you want to re-rail?
Benji [Ponderously]: Hm. I suppose I could.
[Benji leans back to rest on the face of the equipment rack, and looks up toward Drum.]
Benji: As I was saying, you’re probably one of the most down to earth, genuine people I’ve ever met. You’ve seen some shit, you’ve been through a lot of shit, but it’s like you use that experience to do the best you can for other people. You didn’t have a lot of reason to be nice to me when we first met - I was kind an asshole to you, to be honest -
Drum: Nothin’ below industry standard.
Benji: Let me be nice to you for a second! Anyways, you didn’t have much reason to treat me with respect back then, but you didn’t give up on me, and I’m grateful for that, okay? I’m glad we’re friends.
[Benji and Drum both looked at each other for a moment, then Drum blinked slowly to nod.]
Drum: I just knew you were a decent guy underneath the way you acted; needed some time to come out of your shell and learn, that’s all.
Benji: Thank you, really.
Leta [Sniffling]: That was so sweet, you guys are gonna make me cry… [She buries her face in her hands.]
Eadi: That is very touching, I have to agree. It’s nice being able to see people from different walks of life learning how to intermingle with one another.
Cavis: Yeah, and nothing wrong with telling your friends that you care about them every now and then - I love you all, by the way.
Leta: snf. I love you guys too, alright?
Cavis: Hey, c’mere you.
[Cavis stands up and turns around to face Leta, and she flings her arms around to hug him from overtop the equipment rack. Lucy, who’d at this point been lying flat on the ground for a while, suddenly sits bolt upright and her ears swivel toward the hill.]
Lucy: Alright sorry to kill the mood, or whatever you guys are doing, but I think I hear a flock of birds flying this way.
Benji: Oh shit, for real? [He suddenly sits up straight, as well.]
Drum: Yeah, I hear ‘em! Everyone grab somethin’ and hop on, we can get up there before they do, I think.
Ehsi: Oh! Things are happening.
[Lucy bolts off, and all the staff of the Eagle Pit crew start grabbing their choice deterrents from the equipment rack - Ehsi has to lift his hands up and out of the way - and they all pile onto Drum. Before either Adler has much chance to get a word in, they’re all barreling up the road to the top of the hill. Before they know it, Eadi and Ehsi have been left in the dust. Quite literally.]
Leta [From out of frame, distant]: Don’t worry about our stuff, we’ll clean up later! Good interview!
[The roar of Drum’s engine is eventually lost from the camera’s microphone. Now, the only sound in the recording is the rustling of leaves, a slight wind, and the hum of what’s likely a nearby power station. Eadi and Ehsi exchange glances as they let the ambience linger on its own for a moment.]
Eadi: They’ve properly ditched us, haven’t they?
Ehsi: No rest for the professional wildlife harassers.
[Eadi then claps his hands together, and holds them there for a moment.]
Eadi: Well! I guess we had to cut it off somewhere there. Just fine that it ended naturally.
Ehsi: Honestly real upstanding set of blokes, too, I have to give it to them there.
Eadi: I agree, I agree.
[Ehsi drives toward the camera, and the video shakes slightly for a moment as he picks it up and removes the standing base.]
Eadi: So anyways, wasn’t there a market we passed by in town that you wanted to check out?
Ehsi [From off-screen]: You’re right, there was - are we just hitting it, then?
[Eadi continues to fiddle with the camera, and it eventually flips to land on his face.]
Eadi: Yeah, I figure. They’re busy now - leave them to their job. [He glances to focus on the camera.] That’s that, then! As always, we deeply appreciate everyone who tunes in to watch the show, and especially those who have the opportunity to pitch donations, ideas, and even join us for new episodes on their interesting lines of work. This particular episode was suggested and arranged with the help of Jasmine Bennett, a local game warden who’s worked with the Eagle Pit crew in the past, so we’d like to give xir a special thank you today!
Ehsi: Thank you! [His nose pokes into frame in the background behind Eadi.]
Eadi: And we’d also like to go out of our way to thank those who’ve been supporting our cause - your names will be added in post riiight here.
[Eadi points to the right, and accordingly, a series of names both formal and usernames start scrolling along the video. The camera suddenly jerks to the side while this is happening, and it shortly becomes evident that Ehsi has grabbed the camera and is now focused upon the left of his face.]
Ehsi: Like always, we’re open to suggestions for more interesting places and people to meet, so don’t hesitate to send us tips either through our email, the main forum, or to our PO box!
[Ehsi looks away from the camera and toward Eadi.]
Ehsi: Alright, now about heading back into town.
[The camera cuts to black while donor names continue to scroll down the screen. Donor names conclude after a few additional seconds. It then progresses to listing their recording equipment and editing software, displaying an image of a map marked with their past episode locations with a flashing marker over Michigan, and it then concludes with their email, the name of their forum, and the address to their PO box.]
[Video ends.]