Tudor "Muffin" McFingerbang
Marshal Tudor McFingerbang, III (a.k.a. Stud Muffin)
"Yes, my last name is is 'McFingerbang'... No, that's not the name I was given at birth. Yes, I did have it legally changed. Why? Because fuck you, that's why. My name, my life, and if you keep it up, my gun... or dick, down your throat."
This is about the gist of a conversation Tudor has had more times than he'd care to remember.
Tudor is a man of simple pleasures: sweets, fornication, recreational drugs, and gratuitus violence. He gets along well with most people, unless they are needlessly mean, or neadlessly violent (because gratuitous violence isnt always needed).
He's bounced around from team to team, trying to find his place in the world and the agency, though rumor has it that somone's got it out for him and a reassignment is possible in his future.
Physical Description
General Physical Condition
Tudor, as expected of an agent of any organization, is generally quite healthy.
He is however usually gassy due to his eating habbits.
Special abilities
He's particularly good at reading people in a one-on-one setting. This, along with his previous work experience makes him frighteningly good at interrogation.
Mental characteristics
Sexuality
"I'm not gay, but $20 is $20". This loose definition of sexuality has lead many to assume that Tudor is simply a slut. They aren't wrong.
Education
Tudor's attended university for culinary arts, but found far more joy in eating than cooking itself. He did, however, learn how to make muffins and cupcakes, though never to the level of his own satisfaction.
Employment
Tudor has done many things, though the most notable (only ones actually worth mentioning) are:
- Started a rock band: Hard-Boiled Biscuits
- A sues-chef at a Michilen star restaruant
- An amataur wrestler
- A hitman
- Redacted
."yo daddy" -signed Tudor
Accomplishments & Achievements
His band Hard-Boiled Biscuits achieved some relatively obscure fame, just enough to be harrassed every now and then by some fan who was always under the influence of... something. He used the money from sales to put his parents in a nice house.
Failures & Embarrassments
The "hot biscuit" incident during one of the band's shows.
Intellectual Characteristics
Like many people in the agency, Tudor is actually intelligent, just living in the moment due to the overwhelming sense of nihilism he feels.
Morality & Philosophy
A particularly bad trip on drugs one day did 3 things to him:
- Nearly killed him.
- Gave him an insight of insignificance and pointlessness.
- Made him downgrade to less hard substances.
Taboos
- Throwing away baked goods, especially muffins and cupcakes
- Betraying your employer or one who has done him a favor
Personality Characteristics
Motivation
Tudor can easily be motivated (bribed really) by muffins and/or sex. Though not to the degree of being a glutton or prostitute, you can get him to do nearly anything for muffins (specifically Michelle Mason's, or a quick fling.
Savvies & Ineptitudes
Really good at:
- Reading people
- Etiquette
Likes & Dislikes
Likes:
- Muffins
- Inuendos
- Sex
- Rock n' Roll
- Action Movies
- the concept and/or execution of micromanagement
- Weak alchohol
- Keto diet (cuz it kinda cuts out muffins)
Virtues & Personality perks
Will fight for his friends and those he respects
Vices & Personality flaws
Is just short of an alcoholic.
Personality Quirks
He has a strong affinity for the numbers 420 and 69. He has several items themed in ways that represent those numbers.
Relationships
History
After being fired from his job as a sues chef for punching the head chef in the face (after watching him flip a pan of perfectly good muffins out of anger), Tudor was strung out on... something. Sam found him, threw him in a car as if kidnapping him, and made sure he got all the heavy drugs out of his system. He also got him on a team at Butterscotch .
Shared Acquaintances
The entirety of Team Lambda Mateus Jefferson
Alignment
Chaotic Horny
Age
32
Date of Birth
20th of April
Spouses
Siblings
Children
Pronouns
He/him
Sex
Male
Gender
Male
Presentation
Masculine
Eyes
Brown
Hair
Brown
Height
186 cm (6' 1"}
Weight
103 kg (227 lbs)
Quotes & Catchphrases
- "69, aaaaallllriiiight!"
- "It's always better if you have a couple of guitars and some drums to cover their screams... or duct tape.... duct tapeis always useful".
- "Your party ends here."
Belief/Deity
Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster
- English
- Romanian
- French
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