Session 164

All Fleshed Out

General Summary

• Dazki sent a report to Tex, then they continued exploring the mines.
• After a time, the party came to a confusing junction where some paths looped back around in on itself. One of the paths led deeper.
• The next chamber had another undead dwarven "miner" who obsessively repeated "it's all meat", scrawling the words along the walls.
• They took out the "miner" and focused on the translucent crystal in the next room: it blocked their way, but it had something slightly different scrawled on it.
• They worked out that the solution to the puzzle was the word "hold", so they tried holding hands to pass through the crystal. The four party members weren't strong enough to make it work at first, but Dwardazik somehow managed to get Gemineye to add its strength, allowing them to pass.
• That caused Gemineye to manifest itself physically, and it had a conversation with the party.
• Apparently, Baxton has been using the ring to communicate with Gemineye, telling it that it's a parasite and that Dazki wants to kill it.
• It also calls Dazki "the itchy-itchy man", seemingly referencing the allergic reaction that Dwardazik has whenever he's near Dazki for too long.
• Dwardazik gave Marvin the ring to stick in the bag of holding, Gemineye returned back into Dwardazik, and they continued.
• Not too much further in, they found a room where the miners probably would have rested as they worked, and a ball-in-a-cup toy.
• The toy was inexplicably fascinating. The goal is to get the ball to land in the cup, but if you miss, it's OK: the ball is on a string, so you can try again.
• The images of "Jahdzan" and "Argon" continued telling their story: "Jahdzan" had started to feel physically ill after some leeches dug their way into his skin, but he kept moving forward, knowing that "she" is probably in worse shape — admitting that "the child couldn't have survived", as "that was the point".
• They fought a guardian at the end of this chamber and dispelled a magical barrier, opening passage to a tavern run by (apparently) a dwarven woman.
• The tavernkeep was using illusions to make the tavern seem generally more appealing to any passing dwarves, having been told what they like.
• With some convincing, she gave them a key that supposedly allows them to open the door leading out, even though that door is definitely a mimic.

Full Recap

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The Best of Us — After The Rest of Us

The party finish their short rest, during which Dazki sends the first report to Tex:

In mine. Guardian worm dead. Going deeper. Miners all seem dead, undead. Many illusions of past miners. Continuing down, so far seems doable.

They take down their barricade. Another ooze is behind the door, but as before, it's easy to spend about a minute to take it out without other consequences. Dazki gets some sticks of dynamite from the bag of holding to set a trap so that they can quickly explode the tunnel on their way out if needed.
They scout further into the tunnels. There is a two-way fork with both options leading to confusing decisions (some of which loop around on each other). One of the more interesting paths leads 90 feet down to a room with slimy walls and glowing / floating jellyfish creatures.
They take their chances with the tunnels, and they land right in front of another undead dwarven "miner" (not hostile this time) in a room with a lot of writing on the walls and floors (and minecart tracks leading from it, though there were no indications of it continuing on the other side). There is a translucent crystal, similar to the one from before. The "miner" is in the process of writing more, and muttering it under his breath. The writing (and his muttering) all consistently say things like "it's all meat", "they say it's all gems and jewels, but it's all flesh and blood and bones", "the earth we dig is alive", "we've awoken the world, it sees us, it's angry now", "it's alive and it bleeds". Dwardazik clunks his head. Worms crawl out, which they crush and stab, as Dwardazik finishes the job on the "miner".
Theran tries to use the same trick that cleared the blockage before, but it didn't work this time. Scrawled along the crystal is a phrase that the dwarf has scrawled, but the last word is different for each person: "it's all moat/melt/heat/mead". Noticing that each word is just "meat" with one letter replaced, they combine the replaced letters to spell the word "hold". They try confidently walking into the wall while all holding hands, but it doesn't quite seem to be enough people to solve the problem. Dwardazik tries to convince Gemineye to contribute, which seems to work well enough that they make it through.

An In-Person Session

Gemineye has manifested itself as a corrupted dwarven child, bigger than Dwardazik remembers from the first time he encountered it. It doesn't seem to notice anyone else, but it looks up at Dwardazik. Dwardazik puts his war pick and shield away and picks up the child.

Gemineye: Am I a parasite?
Dwardazik: You are Gemineye.
Gemineye: The smooth man said I'm a parasite.
Marvin: ..."smooth man"?
Dwardazik: Do not listen to him! I swear, he's nothing but — ...I will destroy this ring if he says that one more time. You tell me if he says anything bad to you, OK?
Marvin: This is Gemineye? Dwardazik, you didn't tell me you were pregnant!
Dwardazik: Well... kind-of... you were told that?
Marvin: I thought it was metaphorical!
Gemineye: Because smooth man said that all of my brothers and sisters are parasites, and you guys kill all of my brothers and sisters.
Dwardazik: That's because they're being manipulated! Don't you remember our conversation that we had about this? You're your own individual now, you don't have to listen to what "Mother Girth" says.
Gemineye: I'll try, but I think your family is still being mean to me! Especially the itchy-itchy man.
Dwardazik: Which one's the itchy-itchy man? Point to him.
Gemineye points to Dazki.
Dwardazik: Well, you can't expect everybody to just immediately like you, if you don't try to become friends. You have to talk with him!
Gemineye: I don't like him. He makes me itchy.
Dwardazik, struggling: Maybe that's just because he —
Gemineye: And he definitely wishes for us all to die.
Dwardazik: I don't think so.
Gemineye: You say he's family, but he's always mean to you! Family isn't mean to family! Maybe he's a parasite!
Dwardazik: Gemineye, look. Dazki and I have had a complicated relationship, OK? There's been some ups and downs, but —
Gemineye: Smooth man says itchy-itchy man wants to kill me, and I don't want to die yet! I have this family!
Dwardazik, taking off Baxton's ring and showing it: Is this what "the smooth man" is?
Gemineye: The man with the bumpy face and the nice voice!
Theran: The guy Dazki stabbed. Dazki, how long did you say that you've been doing that Turmoil meditation?
Dazki: Every day since we entered The Phantasmagoria.
Theran: And how long has Dwardazik been sleeping close enough to you to feel allergic?
Dazki: Since about halfway to Axecut, I think?
Theran: I'm not sure if the two are related, but it seems to make sense, since you're the one doing it and it's making Gemineye specifically get itchy. ...I'm not saying that you should stop.
Gemineye: See, look! They're conspiring against us now!
Theran: I'm not conspiring against you.
Dwardazik: They're just talking. Nathan brings up a good point. If what he's doing is causing you discomfort, it's good that we know that.
Gemineye: But he's a deceiver! He's the lying one!
Dwardazik: He has to do that! He's the face that has to interact with people!
Gemineye: Family doesn't lie to family.
Dazki: I try not to lie to any of you. So if you have any questions for me, now would be a great time to ask, and I will answer as honestly as I am able.
Gemineye: Smooth man likes you, and I'm not supposed to talk to smooth man. So, I'm not going to talk to itchy-itchy man, either. Because itchy-itchy man is going to find a way to kill me, 'cause I'm a parasite, right?
Dwardazik: You are not a parasite. Right?
Dazki: I don't know enough to really know the answer to that.
Dwardazik: Whaddaya mean?!
Gemineye: Smooth-talking man says that all of Mother Girth's children are parasites, and that even though you like me now, eventually you'll come to realize that I'm a parasite too, and then you'll kill me. And family's not supposed to kill family!
Dwardazik: Dazki, you're not thinking about harming Gemineye, right?
Dazki: I'll be honest. I do not trust Gemineye. But Dwardazik, I trust you. So if you say it's OK, then for now, I am willing to go on that. I am going to remain slightly suspicious and observant, but ultimately, I will trust your judgment.
Gemineye: It's cold out here. Can you eat me?
Dwardazik carries Gemineye while he turns his back to the rest of the party, and Gemineye disappears.
Dwardazik: Well. I apologize about that... I'd never experienced something like that before!
Marvin: ...am I high?
Theran: No, that actually happened.
Dazki: If you are, then we all are.
Marvin: So you actually ate that thing?
Dwardazik: Look, I understand that was a weird experience, but it's not like... I mean, you've known that Gemineye is with me! Something allowed Gemineye to manifest for a little bit. And that was pretty crazy, how much they were able to articulate their thoughts! I think Gemineye's come a long way.
Marvin: Is Gemineye supernatural? Is it/he/she... how does it even identify?!
Dwardazik: Well. Maybe when we're not under the pressure of completing this mission, you can spend some time and talk to Gemineye? You can ask those questions then, eh?
Marvin: ...yeah. Sure. OK.

Dwardazik taunts Baxton a little, takes the ring off, and hands it to Marvin to place into the bag of holding. They continue through the mines.

Dig Deeper

Several more undead dwarven "miners" up ahead are mindlessly picking away at the wall, throwing bits off the wall into mine carts nearby. Dazki deactivates his Driftglobe, which reveals that some areas up ahead are actually being lit by unexpected sources along the walls: eyeballs along the wall that blink. They sneak past. Another crystal, which Dwardazik touches, revealing "Jahdzan" and "Argon". "Jahdzan" walks further along the tracks and, as he has been known to do, laments to "Argon":

Wow, these glittering halls would be quite the sight, wouldn't they Argon! I think all I needed was a good rest... I feel better than ever!
The axe beak starts plucking at his vest.
What are you doing, Argon?
He pats around himself, and he lifts up his shirt: six tiny leeches are stuck to the side of his abdomen. He scratches at them, which causes them to disappear under his skin.
Um... well... I guess, if they ain't causin' no trouble... there's no reason to delay! Come on, Argon!
He walks further, disappearing out of range of the crystal.

The party continue quietly, barely avoiding making a scene when another dwarven "miner" notices them. They find a locked room, which Dazki opens. It's a room with two chests: one is a mimic, which they detect and avoid. The other holds a severed arm holding a wooden toy: a cup that has a ball attached to it by a string. Dazki recovers the toy, but (Wisdom Save 15) he is particularly fascinated by it. He feels compelled to try to get the ball into the cup. He takes a few tries, and:

He gets it in, and then he immediately stops caring about it, tossing it aside and warning the others away from it. They move on.
Further down, the eyes along the walls have gotten bigger, glowing more brightly. Dwardazik starts destroying every eye he sees. The road splits three ways up ahead, one containing another rust-spreading ooze. The "meat" from along the walls has gotten overgrown, taking over the floors in addition to the walls. While in this part of the mine, (Wisdom Save 5) Dwardazik mistakes all the meat for a plethora of red gemstones like the ones from the first room. He breaks one off the wall and stuffs it in his pocket.
They go up the side with the ooze, Theran taking the time to kill it and a second one behind it. It leads to a dead end with a worm-infested corpse and a chest. They methodically kill all the worms and move to the chest. Carved into the chest is a message: "If I die, please give this to my —". Inside the chest is a spell scroll of Conjure Barrage.
Down the next passage, "Jahdzan" and "Argon" appear, the former up to his usual shtick. He scratches at his side.

Phew. All that energy from earlier has really kinda left me! How are you holding up, Argon? I mean, I was lamenting about a metaphorical stomachache, but I think something has made me physically ill! I know we need to eat, but I can't bring myself to consume anything, knowing how hungry she might be. Or, is it "they"? Ugh, I know, the child couldn't have survived! That was the point, wasn't it? To...
...injure the incipient infant?
...eliminate the embryonic enemy?
...unset the undesired unborn?
He continues muttering phrases, scratching his side, as he proceeds through a bubble that seems to lead further down.

That bubble is in a larger chamber that opens up, holding a "plasmid guardian" inside. They investigate the bubble, which awakens the guardian who says: "YOU ARE UNAUTHORIZED TO SPREAD YOUR PURITY TO THE LOWER LEVELS".

Combat Summary

• The guardian is full of broken arrows, rotting fruit, and — most notably — a ton of leeches swimming around inside of it.
• It used a Suggestion spell to try to convince Marvin to become infected by the leeches in order to continue (and not suffer the attacks that it intended to dole out).
• It eventually kept trying to attack Dwardazik, but Theran kept knocking it back with his Shooty Blam-Blam attack before it could get close enough.
• The main goal it seemed to have was to just try to get someone infected by leeches so that it wouldn't have to attack them.
• Dwardazik ran up to get the killing blow, which splashed acid (and a leech or two) all over him as it exploded.

The barrier stays up even after the guardian is destroyed. Dwardazik starts just constantly attacking it. They debate getting infected by leeches, but then they realize that they can just dispel the barrier with one of the scrolls from the government. This works, and they proceed down.

Tavern in the Cavern

Editor's note: because everybody loved this so much, here's the music that was playing in this area: Calliope.ogg.

Muscular, undulating walls make up this chamber. Despite this, there are various tables of drink glasses and food scattered throughout. There's a dwarven lady, swaying back and forth. She slowly fills a pitcher of ale, walks about five feet, pours it on the ground, staggers back to the keg, and refills it once again.
What appears to be a large egg has been cracked open, and a mummified corpse lies in what is left of the egg goo. (Investigation 17) probably an elf, though it's too far gone to tell which sub-type of elf.

As Dazki gets closer to the door, he sees that it's a mimic, and he also sees that the food around the tavern is not as good as it appears. And as Marvin approaches the dwarven lady, he starts to hear the noises of a typical tavern: patrons chattering, glasses clinking... but he doesn't see any of that, as she walks over with a tray of mugs.

Marvin: Are you the bartender here?
Tequila: Hello?
Marvin: Hello there! So, what's your name, and the name of this fine establishment you have here?
Tequila pulls out a small bottle with a worn label on it, as if trying to remember something.
Tequila: My name's Tequila Wormbottle!
Dazki informs them about the illusions over the food.
Tequila: Can I offer you some other things with your drinks?
Dazki: What other things do you have?
Tequila: ...dwarf food?
Dwardazik: What kind of dwarf food?
Tequila: Food that dwarves eat, I think!
Dazki: Not hungry, thank you.
Dwardazik: Gotta work soon.
Theran: Yeah, we just rolled into town. Not really hungry right now. But, how's the vibe? Is this a typical crowd?
Tequila: Well, there used to be more visitors, but they're gone now. Hi, how's it going! Do you want something to drink?
Theran: I'm fine.
Dazki: I'm good, thank you.
Dwardazik breaks the calliope.
Theran: So, what are the important spots in town?
Tequila: I've never left this chamber. I was born here!
Theran:

Tequila: It's OK, the dwarves have told me everything I need to know! (She holds up another glass of ale.) Here, you need this!
Theran: I really don't...
Dwardazik: We have a really important message for Mother Girth. Can you tell us where she is?
Tequila: I don't understand your question?
Dwardazik, pointing to the northern door: What's past there?
Tequila: Oh, I don't know, I've never left this chamber. But you definitely need a key to get through there. The door doesn't like it if you don't have the key!
Dazki: Do you have the key?
Tequila: Of course I do! I'm the barkeep! I run this tavern.
Dazki: Can we have the key?
Tequila: Can I get you a drink?
Dazki: Not thirsty...
Tequila: Perhaps a lovely stew or sandwich?
Dazki: Do you have anything more in the flavor of, key?
Tequila: Ooh, I have a key!
Dazki: May I have the key?
Tequila: A tavernkeeper is supposed to receive a payment for handing out keys. That's what the dwarves say.
Dwardazik: I think you're worth it. (He pulls out a "ruby" from his pockets, which is just some of the meat that he took off the walls before.)
Tequila: Ooh, that's quite the specimen! I will accept this, as payment for the key! Please enjoy your stay here! (She hands him the key.)
Dazki: Do you have any other scrolls, or swords, or anything like that that might be for sale?
Theran: Yeah, or a lost-and-found?
Tequila: I do have a lost-and-found, but the dwarves said that a lady shouldn't give away her stuff for no man! They have to be one that they love first. That's what the dwarves said. I was born here, I believe them!
Dazki: Could we pay you for the items, the physical objects, in the lost-and-found?
Tequila: The dwarves said that giving away stuff for money is called prostitution.
Dazki: But, you just gave the key away in exchange for a ruby. (Persuasion 18)
Tequila: Eh, I guess it makes as much sense as anything else here... ... ...Hello, would you like anything to drink?
Dwardazik: Where is this lost-and-found?
Tequila: Oh yeah!

Tequila pulls out a crate of mostly useless items (worthless mundane jewelry, cracked potion bottles), but there is an intact potion with a grayish liquid in it, its label depicting a giant flexing. (Arcana 20) It's a Potion of Stone Giant Strength. They take it.

Tequila: Wait, is that supposed to be for you?
Dazki: Yeah, I lost it in here.
Tequila: Oh. That makes sense. I didn't see you before, but I didn't put it in there... ... ...Hello, it's been a while since we've had new faces in here. Would you like anything to drink or eat?
Dwardazik: Yeah, yeah, we'll get to that later.