A Long Road

My travels have brought me to the den of some old ancient vampire. Though, she seems to stave off the need to feed on the blood of the living, I can’t imagine living a life suffering both the curse of undeath and hunger. Even though I find it repulsive, I can’t help to feel remorse for this Ostrava. I pray that one day she finds peace. But once you become undead, I don’t think there is any turning back. I think I will try to ask Inara tonight if she knows anything else of this undead curse. Maybe she knows something I don’t know.
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Well, I’ve learned not to interpret Irina during her meditation. Being half-elf and not having a mother for most my life, I am still unfamiliar with this “trance”. Though, she can’t blame me, everyone else seemed to have ignored her need for rest to bother her for something. Oh well, she hasn’t told me much of anything that I did not already know. I still wonder if all this is pointless… I will approach Inira when the time is right. For now, I think I will focus on what Ostrava just told me... The Watchers? Who are they really and what is this “Black Jackal” really after... I think it’s time to sleep.
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We are now traveling North-East to Alfarid. Hassim and Grimaldis seem to know a lot about this land. Though I’ve only known them for a short time, I feel something off about Hassim. It could be nothing. Though he has been upfront, so many things I am unsure of. But I am a foreigner in these lands; so, I must trust both their guidance if I am to survive and get the answers I am looking for. Grimaldis seems to be an intense individual as well… Gods, using us as puppets. Would we truly be better with out them?
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After my chat with Inira, Inara and Dekar come up to me with very troubling questions. What was my patron doing in Dekars dreams? What is he planning? Every time I think I’m getting closer to an answer, my patron seems to surprise in the more horrific ways. I am sure it knows what I am planning and my feelings toward it. But even though Dekar seemed eager to help me kill a “God”, are we even capable of such a feat? I would like to know more of what Dekar can do. From what I experienced on our travels with those … “dwarfs” ... He has proven a very capable fighter. I must be honest about my who I am if everyone is going to trust me…and for once, I felt a kindred nature in Inara, even if minuscule; It’s the first time I’ve felt something like this in a while. Mother… Father...