Day 370
The next morning belongs entirely to Magdalena. Together we begin gathering the dreamflowers and it is so, so much harder than I thought it could be.
The fully formed flowers project their magic like a flare. They are deep, rich purple brightening into rich magenta at the centre that glows with light. They are well-named for their sleep-inducing fragrance. Even ten feet away I feel drowsy and getting nearer brings me dangerously close to sleep. I am told that inhaling the scent directly can put even an Undying to sleep for years at a time. Apparently one clever person once wore it as a perfume after developing a tolerance in themself. It's the perfect tool to slip unnoticed through any place you need.
With Magdalena's guidance I'm able to gather eight flowers - one more than we need for this working. I'll save this extra blossom, of course. I'm sure it will be the answer to a problem that I don't even know exists yet. Potions made from its pollen or petals would be even more effective than the scent.
With this first task complete Magdalena has started teaching me the magic of the Undying - things that are not for mortal awareness. I had always wondered, as a mortal, if great workings like these were unknown because of some power or barrier keeping it hidden or if the knowledge was simply lost to those short-lived. The answer, it turns out, is someone intentional and somewhat mundane. Of course the things that are known to the Undying are uncommonly powerful and likely to be misused by one with a shorter view of the future. But also, it's near-impossible to do. These flowers, not seen for thousands of years, are maybe a once-in-a-lifetime experience for even the longest-lived elf. To collect these in addition to the other things Magdalena says we will need...unthinkable.
"Besides," my teacher remarks almost nonchalantly, "Master only ever taught three of us this magic,"
I steadfastly refuse to bite at this dangling lure. There is enough chaos in my mind and heart already. Graciously she tells me anyway: Kaie, her teacher, is to magic what the Storm is to weather. All magic flows around and from her, arcane or mystic.
"In a couple thousand years I'll introduce you,"
And then she gives me the rest of my component list:
- The silver-leafed dreamflowers, containing powerful sleep magic that could lay to rest even the most powerful of the Undying. They bloom only in the greatest of adversity: Tears, struggle, and hope; not blood. They can be cultivated in the right conditions, she notes.
- Essence of an eldritch spirit. These spirits are reclusive figures who dwell deep in the eldritch forests around groves. Now, that likely means they remain accessible only in the North. She tells me that persuading one to part with its essence will be difficult but so is harvesting the essence from a slain spirit. She is unsurprised when I dismiss this option. "I have long since realized that your softness is strength, not weakness,"
- Soul grass that grows around the headwaters of the Great River which Mystery told me about. The river is fed from the Spring of Souls and the grass growing around it will cut your very soul if you are not careful handling it.
- Crimson spirit crystal. It seems that this is the first component on the list that is known to mortals and as such it is valuable and treasured. It forms deep in the dwarven mines to the South, transitioning from pale yellow to blue, purple, crimson, and finally a light-devouring black. In all its forms it extends the lifespan of the user, but the older crystals are more powerful.
- Seeds from a heartwood tree. These trees take five centuries to mature fully and Magdalena has only ever seen them in the trolls' ancestral home. If I'm able to withstand the flames I could probably retrieve some. Or...I could approach the Eldest and ask. Their magic is closely guarded and perhaps not known to even trolls at large, though once they were used to extend the vitality of their most precious elders.
- A piece of bloodmoon jade, mostly found on the other side of the sea. It is sacred to the Church of the Bloodmoon (Mora, the red duellist) and so some devout may have brought it here with them. It is used to sustain one's health, vitality, and fighting spirit.
- One last component that Magdalena says I will not be able to find myself, so she will go instead. It is found on still another continent, one I have not even heard of.
As she describes these items the prospect of what I'm doing becomes solid in my mind. Seven items and unimaginably complicated magic...and perhaps I will have my Thalien back in the world of the living where I know he belongs. With the very first component safely gathered and stored in a secret space next to my heart it feels real.
But, Magdalena reminds me, it is something I must do alone. I cannot bring any of my family with me nor tell them what I'm hunting or why. If I am successful I can invent whatever story I need to make it seem like an impossibility for anyone else to attempt. I can't even tell Thalien.
My heart cries out at the prospect of not bringing Dal with me to an eldritch forest, Mystery to the Great River, maybe even Lyssa to the mines. To face the trolls' home (or worse, the Eldest) alone...unthinkable.
But other members of the Undying will also be interested in these components and while I might defend myself, there is no hope of my family defending themselves from those who can invade their very souls for information. This cannot be a shared task.
I think of Lyssa, Dal, and Thalien himself coming here alone because this is where I needed them. All of them were lucky enough to find people and purpose here even while they bore my absence. I, too, found people and purpose when I was most alone. Being far apart is not the worst thing, as much as it tears at my already scattered heart to think that I might lose people while I'm gone just like I lost Dal and Thalien.
"What if I lose others while I do this? Look what happened to Dal and Thalien,"
"But look what happened to Lyssa. Yes, fret and worry. But trust how capable they are,"
With my resolve hardened she gives me two more things:
- Magic for my family. It will bind us at least so that I can feel their heartsblood flowing while they are still alive, and feel it if it stops. It may do more for those I'm closest to - I will have to find out.
- A notebook that is older than the Empire and the Empress herself. It is the beginnings of my foundation in ancient magic, something apart from the arcane and the mystic. For the next hundred years our lessons will change and I will have to reconsider the concepts that I use to ground my current magic. Basic knowledge of ancient things will be a start, just like my heartsong spell.
Somehow both heavy and light, I leave Magdalena for the day and ascend the ziggurat to collapse, staring at the sky. I let my heartsong play and lose myself in the music until I feel it coursing through my limbs and I understand its melody. One thread, steady and determined above the subtle harmonies below. It dips back and loses itself amongst the other tunes before soaring off again and again, always returning.
Through the fog of this magic I feel a crackle at the periphery of my senses and I rise, disturbed from my haze only to find a speck on the horizon where I have stared every evening for days. Winging his way towards us faster than I could have hoped - Haze and four tiny figures atop him.
The electricity grows as I stand and strain to catch a better glimpse and all of a sudden a bolt of lightning strikes beside me and Lyssa is tumbling into me, limbs, wings, and stowed weapons colliding as we finally find each other, laughing and crying with my heartsong spiking joyfully.
I clutch her to me like I'm afraid she'll disappear as quickly as she arrived but she is real and solid and breathing in my arms, telling me about Randall, her shield bearer, and the dwarves and I tell her about the fae and we pass several minutes in breathless meaningless talk until Haze lands and we have to tear ourselves away.
I welcome Tira and Knotrael back and make introductions to Randall, a very handsome and sturdy-looking fighter. A small crowd has formed at the base of the ziggurat as we descend to make further introductions. Haze and Crag have already flown off together when we reach the ground and I get the absolute pleasure of seeing Tira and Lyssa meet Mystery.
I have been so looking forward to this moment and I allow myself just a second to revel in the astonishment before Mystery explains herself.
For now though, as much as everyone is desperate to sit around a fire and hear stories, I put Tira and Alder in charge of camp and whisk Lyssa into my cottage to be alone in blissful silence before she insists on cooking dinner. Just the two of us intertwined, wrapped around one another. I don't need a spell to feel her heart beating against mine.
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