Gygax the Mimic

Gygax Mimic

Name (with Titles)

Gygax the Mimic, The Vomitter, The Speaking Box, Head Hunter  

Classes (To whatever level you made it to):

Spell Thief 6  

Notable Ability Score (your highest or most used):

Hide +16, Move Silently +9

Journal entry (Your entry):

23 adventure journal entries 4 character entries  

Alignment (with detail):

Neutral Good, mostly. Gygax was neutral to most people with how he interacted with them, but would do good things for and with his party, Kryptic Cabal.    

Notable Deeds:

Has eaten many things out of pure joy, Heads, Strange potions, etc.   Hiding in a corner and surprise attacking a group of morph trolls and when becoming visible after attacking and attaching to the leader he appeared as a shocked looking trolls head.  

Religion (if any):

Fharlanghn  

Physical Traits:

When last seen, Gygax was a large walking, talking chest with 51 feet. Brown and grey in color, a foot tall red Mohawk, yellow eyes, and able to transform into:
Necklace (gold, silver, iron, bronze), Ring (gold, silver, iron, bronze), Quill, Backpack (small, medium), Blanket, Pillow, Boots (leather with or without metal), Shirt (linen and leather), Pants (linen and leather), Gloves, Cloak (wool, linen, leather), Lantern, Plate (wood and metal), Mug or tankard (wood and metal), Plant (small with or without flower), Stool, Torch unlit, Dagger, Small shield or buckler, Rock (various minerals), Precious gems (various types and shapes), Coins (various minerals and currencies), Sling (with or without ammunition), Crossbow broken (small), Quiver (with or without bolts or arrows), Utensils or tools in a pile, Rope, Candles unlit, Caltrops (non-lethal damage), Parchment, Chainmail shirt, Bracers (leather or iron), Chest armor (leather or iron), Leg armor (upper and lower, Lether or iron), Helm (leather or iron), Pile of trash, flint and steel, wooden holy symbol, shocked morph troll head, plate with squiggling tentacles covered in sauce, small glass jar with a lid, Merlock Head, Tonton Scoot    

Notable Comrades:

Doots Does Not Have a Last Name, Timothy Tontington (TONTON), Melving my Brother, and 3 others  

Notable Rivals:

SPIDERS  

Organizations (If any):

Kryptic Cabal  

Notable Items:

Aarav, Gygax’s offspring    

Ambition

To gather all information on Mimics in the world and to hopefully meet one. Maybe eat it. Second ambition, to eat all things at least once.  

Backstory

Wow what an adventure it has been so far. I think I need to start even before my beginning as I am now.
Many, many moons ago before I became sentient, I was a regular mimic in a dungeon. I would do the regular thing you would expect of a mimic in a dungeon. Disguise, trick, fight, and eat. Those were simple days.
Over time I would hear stories about my kind and started to learn about others like me in other areas of the world. There were rumors, fables, tales, and stories of kinder, meaner, bigger, stranger mimics out there. As time went on for me, something started to stir in me about these other mimics out and about.
Now you need to understand this was over a great many years, where I was actually growing and getting smarter, like a pet that learns more and more but not yet sentient like I am now. I do not recall how old I had become in that time, that is why I say my age is that of when I became sentient.
Oh yeah, I suck at telling stories in the right order, but there is some sense and information all about in the telling of it. So here are the things I heard in the dungeon long ago about what is known of mimics.
The first adventurer to find and succeed against a mimic was a brave soul named Gygax, I named myself after him. We are able to mimic stone and wood naturally, as well as inanimate objects. We are neither good or evil, just an animal is neither good or evil, just wanting to live. The smaller we are the more intelligent we are. We are always hungry but can be spoken to if found out. Throughout our years of living, we individually learn the languages adventurers and other creatures speak around us. A scholar, HaHaHa, by the name of Maerlun studied us as a creature and found the we have thick, tough skin as our defense, and classified us as aberrations. We are slow to move in most cases as we use our pseudopods to pull our selves along, the older and trickier we got we found the pedal, legs, way of moving. Our means of sensing our environment is by use of “eyespots” that sense heat, light, and vibration. We are good at grappling and using our sticky substance to our advantage.
There are many types of mimics out in the wide world. An adventurer named Detweiler found a metal mimic that could change its color and shape to copy any man-made metal object. Most often found as money or rare and dangerous looking weapons. The metal mimic differs from most mimic types as the smaller it is deadlier it is.
Deep in dark abandoned woods are house killer mimics. They disguise themselves as buildings and eat what ever creature enters it. They are slow and not very bright, but very effective and dangerous. Not much else is known about them.
Later in years mimics learned to better alter their coloring to look more like objects that animals and adventurers recognized and wanted. Around this time also is when it was learned that mimics can not change their mass but only their shape. This is with the classification of the common mimic, rather than just mimic. It was also learned that mimics are immune to acid, mold, green slime, and various pudding monsters.
There is a very odd story I heard about an adventurer the left the world and found a space mimic. The adventurer was known as B. Heard. He is known to have said that space mimics originally were enslaved for magic user’s purposes but became unreliable and abandoned in space. They learned the innate ability to cast spells like an illusionist. These space mimics eat as any other mimic but have adapted to eat magic as well, and learn new spells this way. Then there very few tales of greater mimics. Their origin unknown, but speculation says they are either very old or were altered by some strange magical means. Either way these mimics have become very intelligent and have learned to alter their shape to become multiple objects at the same time, like a shack filled with furniture.
Later in time adventurers believed that mimics had lost intelligence due to their lack of ability to speak multiple languages, but in fact mimics had learned to hide this ability for preservation purposes so as not to be hunted for study. Around this time an adventurer and scholar named Bricken had ranked us in a list of top 12 most dangerous monster to encounter, he says obnoxious but I think dangerous is better.
Once I heard a fable about a race of mimic folk. They a shy and private and very difficult to find. Thay are very good at hiding do not understand other creatures or beings’ belief in law. Not only are they hardy, but also very easy to speak with when confronted with one. It is said that these folk were either an experiment of magic or a magical experiment of fusing humanoids and mimics together. Either way both these ideas end the same, the experiment was left on its own when done with.
Ah but I almost forgot about the adventurers that learned to be like a mimic, the mimic class. There are few that take this path. Those that do are prone to do so from birth, as most stories have told. They learn to imitate other appearances of creatures as well as mannerisms. Over time the more an adventurer becomes a mimic the more they lose of themselves.
So that is what I had learned about my species in the dungeon I was inhabiting. This over time become something of a looping thought. The more the creature me had the thought the stronger the feeling that I wanted and needed something more than what I was doing. Then one morning “I” awoke to who I am now. I had shrunk in size from 15 cubic ft to 1 cubic ft. but I realized I was able to change and move about more freely and thinking was easier, there was also less of a creature drive to live and more of a sentient drive to learn and discover. That was when “I” was born and left the dungeon to explore and learn about the myths, fables, tales, stories, and legends about my species.
    And now for the telling of my adventures as a sentient mimic.

Physical Description

General Physical Condition

Hardy, Tough, Tiny, Lots of Legs

Body Features

Mimic, that should explain it. Right now I am 1 cubic ft.

Facial Features

Eyes: Yellow Hair: Red Face: Changes

Identifying Characteristics

Tiny

Physical quirks

Lots and Lots of Legs

Special abilities

I AM A MIMIC.

Apparel & Accessories

2 daggers

Specialized Equipment

????

Mental characteristics

Personal history

Many, many moons ago before I became sentient, I was a regular mimic in a dungeon. I would do the regular thing you would expect of a mimic in a dungeon. Disguise, trick, fight, and eat. Those were simple days. Over time I would hear stories about my kind and started to learn about others like me in other areas of the world. There were rumors, fables, tales, and stories of kinder, meaner, bigger, stranger mimics out there. As time went on for me, something started to stir in me about these other mimics out and about. Now you need to understand this was over a great many years, where I was actually growing and getting smarter, like a pet that learns more and more but not yet sentient like I am now. I do not recall how old I had become in that time, that is why I say my age is that of when I became sentient. Oh yeah, I suck at telling stories in the right order, but there is some sense and information all about in the telling of it. So here are the things I heard in the dungeon long ago about what is known of mimics. The first adventurer to find and succeed against a mimic was a brave soul named Gygax, I named myself after him. We are able to mimic stone and wood naturally, as well as inanimate objects. We are neither good or evil, just an animal is neither good or evil, just wanting to live. The smaller we are the more intelligent we are. We are always hungry but can be spoken to if found out. Throughout our years of living, we individually learn the languages adventurers and other creatures speak around us. A scholar, HaHaHa, by the name of Maerlun studied us as a creature and found the we have thick, tough skin as our defense, and classified us as aberrations. We are slow to move in most cases as we use our pseudopods to pull our selves along, the older and trickier we got we found the pedal, legs, way of moving. Our means of sensing our environment is by use of “eyespots” that sense heat, light, and vibration. We are good at grappling and using our sticky substance to our advantage. There are many types of mimics out in the wide world. An adventurer named Detweiler found a metal mimic that could change its color and shape to copy any man-made metal object. Most often found as money or rare and dangerous looking weapons. The metal mimic differs from most mimic types as the smaller it is deadlier it is. Deep in dark abandoned woods are house killer mimics. They disguise themselves as buildings and eat what ever creature enters it. They are slow and not very bright, but very effective and dangerous. Not much else is known about them. Later in years mimics learned to better alter their coloring to look more like objects that animals and adventurers recognized and wanted. Around this time also is when it was learned that mimics can not change their mass but only their shape. This is with the classification of the common mimic, rather than just mimic. It was also learned that mimics are immune to acid, mold, green slime, and various pudding monsters. There is a very odd story I heard about an adventurer the left the world and found a space mimic. The adventurer was known as B. Heard. He is known to have said that space mimics originally were enslaved for magic user’s purposes but became unreliable and abandoned in space. They learned the innate ability to cast spells like an illusionist. These space mimics eat as any other mimic but have adapted to eat magic as well, and learn new spells this way. Then there very few tales of greater mimics. Their origin unknown, but speculation says they are either very old or were altered by some strange magical means. Either way these mimics have become very intelligent and have learned to alter their shape to become multiple objects at the same time, like a shack filled with furniture. Later in time adventurers believed that mimics had lost intelligence due to their lack of ability to speak multiple languages, but in fact mimics had learned to hide this ability for preservation purposes so as not to be hunted for study. Around this time an adventurer and scholar named Bricken had ranked us in a list of top 12 most dangerous monster to encounter, he says obnoxious but I think dangerous is better. Once I heard a fable about a race of mimic folk. They a shy and private and very difficult to find. Thay are very good at hiding do not understand other creatures or beings’ belief in law. Not only are they hardy, but also very easy to speak with when confronted with one. It is said that these folk were either an experiment of magic or a magical experiment of fusing humanoids and mimics together. Either way both these ideas end the same, the experiment was left on its own when done with. Ah but I almost forgot about the adventurers that learned to be like a mimic, the mimic class. There are few that take this path. Those that do are prone to do so from birth, as most stories have told. They learn to imitate other appearances of creatures as well as mannerisms. Over time the more an adventurer becomes a mimic the more they lose of themselves. So that is what I had learned about my species in the dungeon I was inhabiting. This over time become something of a looping thought. The more the creature me had the thought the stronger the feeling that I wanted and needed something more than what I was doing. Then one morning “I” awoke to who I am now. I had shrunk in size from 15 cubic ft to 1 cubic ft. but I realized I was able to change and move about more freely and thinking was easier, there was also less of a creature drive to live and more of a sentient drive to learn and discover. That was when “I” was born and left the dungeon to explore and learn about the myths, fables, tales, stories, and legends about my species.

Gender Identity

MALE

Sexuality

Ummmm, hahahaha, yes please, I R MALE.

Education

Listening and learning from other creatures.

Employment

What is this?

Accomplishments & Achievements

Alive and sentient

Failures & Embarrassments

I am Tiny

Mental Trauma

I have become sentient but know little about myself or my species, other than what I have heard.

Intellectual Characteristics

I know many languages

Morality & Philosophy

Good but do not know or understand Law

Personality Characteristics

Motivation

I want to know more about myself and my species.

Savvies & Ineptitudes

I take everything at face value, specially in speach.

Likes & Dislikes

Not sure yet, have not experienced enough.

Virtues & Personality perks

I am tiny, good perk

Vices & Personality flaws

I am tiny, bad flaw

Personality Quirks

I take speach at face value.

Hygiene

A thimble of water is enough for a bath.

Social

Religious Views

Farhlanghn

Social Aptitude

I am ok, I think

Mannerisms

Mimic, as I copy, not a pun

Hobbies & Pets

I am a pet, hobby making bags

Speech

Not an Issue

Wealth & Financial state

45gp, 2 Punch Daggers

a recently become sentient mimic travels to learn about the world and himself. He has decided to start as a rogue, even with the wild mage abilities he has. he stands a whole 1' 8" in humanoid form or as a 1 cubic foot chest with many legs.

View Character Profile
Alignment
Neutral Good
Age
1 (the length of time as a sentient Creature)
Date of Birth
Not Yesterday
Birthplace
Dungeon "??????????"
Children
Current Residence
Not the Dungeon
Gender
Male
Eyes
Yellow
Hair
Red
Skin Tone/Pigmentation
Brown / Grey
Height
1' 8" for now
Weight
62 lbs
Quotes & Catchphrases
ACH CRIVENS!!!!!!!!
Known Languages
I forget, that is how many I know.

This Is It !

We are in the Jungle being chased by Thrycrene who are shooting arrows at us. Little D is on my back as I run following Tonton, who has Vikeret and Doots on his back. Realizing that we have almost the entire Thrycrene Army after us, Tonton eats a Fire Eclaire and starts fires behind us. I add to their delay by casting a sonic wall. All of a sudden speaks into all of our minds.   "Stand and Fight. Make a Stand or Die!" blah blah blah etc etc etc.   Little D jumps off my back saying that it is not good to die for a boss that does not fight with you. Vikeret agrees with Little D, and they leave with the two new followers of Doots and the dog that was following us. As the Thrycrene are nearing our location we can hear them screaming and dying from the fire and sonic wall. Then an image of a rock in a clearing comes to us as a location to fight. Doots, Tonton, and myself run there in the hopes of defeating these beast bugs.   Once we arrive in the clearing Tonton lights the surrounding trees on fire as I cast another sonic wall on the edge of the forest we just came out of. We all climb on to the plateau of the rock in the center of the clearing, as Doots starts to play "This Is It". We all feel invigorated ready to fight what comes at us.   I can see a 15ft tall Thrycrene that looks like the general and it has 12 tall special looking Thrycrene around it. I attempt to cast magic missile and fail, and due to my wild magic curse, I become a Large Ewok, "Yub Nub". I very colorful rainbow patterned Thrycrene runs through the sonic wall, dissipating it. Lighting comes crashing down on us twice, that the General cast on us. As Doots and I are on Tonton's back, we ride with him as he climbs off the stone, right before a third lightning strike hits the rock. I down a "Long Nose" potion and grow a size, then throw an SFBPB at the rainbow Thrycrene and it just bounces off his Husk Armor. Rainbow tries to grapple Tonton and fails.   The smaller Thrycrene in the Jungle/forest keep shooting arrows in our direction and missing horribly, HAHAHAHA. The General casts a blow glow on the Rainbow Thrycrene. I then cast another Sonic Wall but using the Rainbows head as the start point, giving it great pain, that cause tons of little worms to wiggle into view from its body. We are all fighting for our lives, drinking potions, and healing each other as best we can. The General walks out of the jungle's edge and cast a circle storm of fire on us, just as two of his special followers try to charge and hit Tonton.   We are all casting, swinging and shooting at any enemy near us, the Rainbow finally falling to it's death. The General finally attacks us, grabbing my head and casting necrotic damage on me. Very hurt my Symbiot is able to open a few cure bottles to slow my death.   The General stands up straight looking at us three and says, "So You Like Stages? Here Is A Stage For You To Stand On."   All of a sudden a Massive Burning Meteor comes hurtling at us. . . .   . . . . .   . . . . .   . . . . .   Gygax is no longer with us, But may there be a slight light of hope that his bloodline does live on.   THE END

I Got Yanked by a God, Pussy(cat)

WAR HAS STARTED ! ! !   We arrived after weeks of travel, and in the distance we can see a large beehive looking structure that is smoking and looks to be on fire. We are told to set up camp for the night and that in the morning we will go to battle. After our tent is set up, I speak to Aarav, my offspring, to stay safe inside of me, and then pray to Farlanghn in the hopes of us all staying alive. As I lay down, pulling the blanket (read cloak) over me to sleep, the others gather to discuss plans as Goose has shown up to add information about a possible ambush.   In the morning we are all told to get ready, and in my hurry I keep the blanket on me thinking it might add to my hide ability ( I keep the blanket on top of me ). The young weird Troll from the North gate many weeks ago arrives and informs us he has been put in charge of us as part of his promotion, his name is "Little D". As all this is going on I sense massive amounts of vibration underground, as the others are also discussing where we are to stand in the battle, far left.   Little D says that if it becomes to bad in the fighting and looks like we will be defeated we must listen to the wise words of his forefathers, RUN. I give our party each a bottle of "Long Nose Potion", which Little D becomes very excited about and drinks it straight away. Little D grows and grows and looks much more fortified and courageous. I decide to also drink a Long Nose Potion, and grow 1 size larger. Vikeret blesses me with a damage protection spell, as Doots gives me and the others a potion as well, which I drink right then. POOF !   All of a sudden I find myself in a peaceful area full of grass and flowers. In a little dell I see a table covered in food and surrounded by comfortable looking pillows to sit or lay on. There are also animals talking, singing, and playing instruments. As I go to take my first step towards the very delicious looking food, I feel (and see) a small cats paw grab me from behind and throw me through a portal. POOF !   I return to the location I was at before this all happened and see the party staring at me in shock. Doots then also drinks the same potion, we all feel a pull to far off lands, but we are all able to resist this and do not move. All of a sudden a Giant (the Stinking) Troll comes running out of a hole in the ground far ahead of the vanguard, shouting "Trouble is coming Fight". He is followed by many different types of creatures, chasing and trying to attack him.   Doots immediately starts to play a rousing battle tune, raising our spirits. I go into hide mode, under my blanket, Tonton drinks the potion I gave him and grows running into battle. Tonton is able to attack large flying creature (with a rider). I then cast Fire Wall with my wand, failing, then shaking and shouting at the stupid stick, try again and succeed in casting a wall of fire on top of our enemy trying to flank is on the other side of a small pond we are near, and blocking easy access to trap us. Vikeret then asks to have the wand to use, which I hand over so I can go into battle and fight. Tonton is getting covered in the enemy trying to ride his back, as Doots stuns the creatures on Tonton's back, an enemy has cast some sort of spell that has tentacles sprout from the ground around Tonton. Little D is able to rush up next to Tonton trying to help him. Tonton, without fail, slays all those riding his back and is able to strike again at the flying creature infront of him, beating a very dead not flying anymore creature. The Rider of the dead flying creature seems to be very strong and glowy.   Before I am able to move up to Tonton and assist, I notice in the distance that the Thrycrene forces have overrun the Troll advance forces and are headed in massive numbers towards us. Little D also seeing this tells us all to Run. I still move forward blocking the Big Bad Thrycrene (BBT) from attacking Tonton. Vikeret is able to cast a sonic Wall on the BBT, which makes the BBT think I cast this and threatens to end my line. All of a sudden fire and lava fall from the sky on us three up front hurting us and slowing our movement. I attempt to use my other wand of summon animal II, failing, but still shouting at the wand and insults at the BBT.   The massive Thrycrene Army still charging towards us overrunning Trolls left and right. Cpt. Bison suddenly appears from the hole the Stinking Troll emerged from, yelling for all to retreat. Tonton says we must leave, Doots passes out after casting a major spell killing the magic using, undead, dead, necro Thrucrene. The BBT casts a bolt of Lighting on to me, barely hurting me, my symbiot takes some damage as well, but my son Aarav is vary hurt by this. As a nor very angry and overly protective father, I attempt to attack the BBT, missing both swings. Little D pushes me out of the way backwards, all of a sudden a round bubble shield wall appears around Little D and the BBT. Little D pulls out a glowing spear and thrusts it into the BBT. I salute him for the rescue and the sacrifice he is committing to guard us all. Little D is able to kill the BBT, but hurts himself so bad he dies.   I run over to grab Little D's body and all the dropped items from the BBT, as I do this I pour a very strong cure potion down Little D's throat hoping he will recover. He awakes as we are all retreating thanking me for the potion. We are all able to retreat a safe distance away to camp.

I'm a Little Teapot

Here is my handle, and Here is my spout. . . . . . . . . . .   I am singing this and humming these kind of songs to my offspring. Of course the others are all looking at me like I have lost my mind. I do tell Doots and Tonton that I now have a son. The others then start to gather all the corpses and light them on fire. All of a sudden a tunnel appears in the fire, and I am on guard.   In the tunnel is a creature running towards us, it is being chased by some other creatures. Then someone appears near us and starts to talk to us like it is a normal thing to do. It's name is Jakix, and is an annoying person, they say that the creature running to us is "Vikeret" and to be a party member. Once Vikeret comes out of the portal tunnel, the portal closes and the fire goes out as well.   Then Jakix offers Doots a strange vial of liquid, and then disappears, good riddance. After that I try to sense any hostility from Vikeret, and can not sense any. So I decide to just got into Chest mode, all 51 feet tucked in and then continue my humming. Still sort of listening in, I learn the Vikeret is an Artificer/Tinkerer. Also, Vikeret is a Formian? Tonton starts to inspect the carts and what they are carrying, Vikeret inspects the vial of liquid, and as Doots starts to walk and inspect the carts I tiptoe behind him.   Vikeret tells Doots the liquid is BAD, very very very BAD. Doots gets a look of horror and does not want to take it back, but he does. Tonton it seems wants to connect the carts together and pull them, so we all look and see if it is possible and how to do it. I find some Iron bars and eat a few, yummy. I end up helping Tonton to move the fallen tree off the road. After some time the carts are attached to each other and Tonton is strapped in to pull them all, and I sit on top of the last cart.   As we start to exit the forest we have traveled through, to get back to the battlefield, I see a weird dark shadow move above, in, and around the forest behind us, and then it disappears. The battlefield is littered with bodies all over the place. after a time we are stopped near a Troll camp by a Large Troll.   Doots seems to be out of it for quite some time as we all wait for him to respond to the Troll. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .   After a while Doots responds and the Troll leads us through the encampment to Seji's location. Where we see Captain Bison and the Tree leaving. We stop in-front of a very Large tent, Seji's. Doots and I mess with the Troll, making him think I am a special trained Box. The Troll asks for all the goods we brought, which Doots give to him for free?.? But we do keep the last cart for ourselves, and we get paid 60,000 GP for the goods and the mission we did, I hold most of it.   Off in the distance we can see the mercenary encampment location, and go there to plan our next course, and we stay for a month before the next adventure starts.

And His Name is Aarav

The guard from the other day comes running into Long Nose's front tent area, while we are having breakfast, with a list of missions from Seji. The guard also informs Doots, as that is who he is talking to, that he was promoted after all the work he did with us at the gate. Doots decides, with us, to choose a supply chain destruction mission, and the guard asks to join us. At first Doots declines this, but after hearing the guards job for Seji, he changes his mind. Tonton walks out of the front tent for some reason and we do not see him until later, I decide to hide, but keep eating.   After the hulabaloo between Doots and the guard, I unhide and ask "Go Shopping?"   I see the guard still standing there with his mouth open, I decide to offer him the great-axe from my inventory. He declines, what a snob, it only has a little saliva on it.   Doots and I go shopping, and find the open market after walking for a bit past mostly weapon and armor smithies. We see a stall with a Troll behind it, as we approach the Troll runs off and gets a much much much older Troll, he is Prophet. Of course as usual everyone talks to Doots first, not realizing I can talk. Doots tells him I am the one wanting to buy, so I ask for an empty vial with a cork, which Prophet has. I then ask to buy some moderate cure potions, they are getting very expensive. Doots suggest we buy more potions in-case, so we buy all the potions Prophet has to sell, and we sell the great-axe that the ungrateful guard did not want to have. Doots is kind enough to wipe off my saliva for Prophet.   As we walk a way for Doots to find a dark secluded alleyway, I begin to talk to my Symbiot, I need to think of a name for it, and I ask it to start practicing on opening and closing the empty vial with the cork in it. It has a little trouble with it, and says it is starving and needs to eat some "soul" food. I then see a stall where a Troll there says he sells live animals. I inform Doots that I need to go there, and I buy 4 live chickens in wooden cages. After paying for them I stuff them all into my mouth. I start crunching on the wood as my Symbiot starts to consume the chickens. We then find and alleyway for Doots where I take a guarding position for him, as he starts to investigate a robe.   As Tonton returns to us, I notice a leaf covered Puppet and a Bison looking in our direction, and I tell Doots this. As I can sense no hostility towards us I do not make a move so Doots can speak with them. The Bison Speaks and says he is called "Captain Bison for Just Ice", and says the Puppet is actually a Dryad named "Cinabari". They have come to us to aid us in our next mission for Seji, which is also going to be our first mission for Seji. As they are all talking to each other, I have a private conversation with my Symbiot. As we get ready to leave, that is when I notice that Tonton is now floating.   We travel for 3 weeks.   During this time my Symbiot has learned to open a bottle with a cork in it, but can not close it yet. We also see many Trolls traveling in the other direction as well as the same direction as us, but we have no contact with any of them as they all seem intent on there moving. As we near the battle field ahead we can hear a MASSIVE battle going on. As we get closer we can only see a few of both sides but the rest are obscured but a huge thick dust and smoke cloud. We continue on without stopping to help, finding the other side of the woods, we continue to our destination.   Coming to the other side of the forest we can see a large mountain where they enemy is coming from and a road that most likely is our goal for attacking the supply chain. Doots, Captain Bison, Cinnabari, Tonton discuss what plans to make. As I am distracted by a strange feeling inside me under my tongue. It is an uncounted for Gold Coin, and that is when I realize. . . .   I HAVE A SON !   I name him Aarav, and can sense that he will be a ranger and will also be stronger than I am currently. I look forward to getting to know him over the next few months as he grows.   As the others seem to have come up with a plan, they chop a tree down to block the road, and I am to be on the right side and attack when the supply caravan comes. After a while we are all able to see a caravan approaching and on either side are 4 Thrycrene each in dark robes and holding bone staffs. As they near and come to a halt, to from the left side near the downed tree, and we all start the fight getting the first few hits in.   First thing to happen is the grass from all around the caravan starts to grow and entangle the Thrycrene, and shortly after that I cast a Wall of Fire on the 4 Thrycrene on the right side. Tonton attacks the 2 that neared the downed tree and bites them, of course. Doots of course starts strumming away, and boosting our will and ability to fight, but the lyrics are so very very wrong. I am able to concentrate long enoug on the Wall of Fire that I kill the 4 Thrycrene on my side, and then start lobbing some of my SFBPB's at the Thrycrene attacking Tonton. I also am able to cast Summon Monster Levle 2, a Celestial Eagle. The Eagle does attack the same Thrycrene, but the Thrycrene gets so mad at the Celestial Eagle that it completely obliterates it.   At some point during the battle a Strange Creature had appeared on top of the last wagon in the caravan. As we neared the end of battle the Starnge Creature disappeared taking the last Thrycrene Necromancer with itself. This ended the battle for us, as all the remaining creatures were undead and no longer supplied with magic to stay "Unaliveded"?.   I HAVE A SON. I AM SO HAPPY.   I am looking forward to getting to known him over the few months he will be with me. Aarav will be a ranger, and he has gained some of my abilities, and he seems to be stronger than I am currently. I am so Proud.

Cloth Board Dances

Night has fallen, Doots and I take watch, Tonton just sleeps. I lightly snooze during Doots taking first watch. All of a sudden Doots psionically links with me waking me up as there are Dire Lions around us. I can sense through vibration that there are six, one of which is trying to take the Papa Digestor we killed. i mind link with it and yell that it is our prey not theirs to take. It ignores me so I cast Wall of Fire from a wand to stop it. Doots cast a bright light on the nose of another Dire Lion near them to blind it, as Tonton is now awake and attacks the one Doots blinded.   The one Tonton and Doots are fighting was trying to take the Mama Digestor from our pile of kills from yesterday. All of a sudden another Wall of Fire appears infront of me to stop me from attacking the one I was going after, the Papa thief. Tonton is able to kill the one he is attacking with biting it to death. Before I can fully wound the Dire Lion I am after it drops the Papa Digestor and runs past me, were I am able to wound it more but not enough before it runs away.   At the end of all this, Tonton goes back to sleep like nothing happened, Doots cuts off all three heads of Mama, Papa, and Baby Digestors as proof we did the work. For the rest of the evening nothing happens.   The next morning Tonton and I carry the bodies of the three Digestors and the Dire Lion back to town. As we approach the northern gate to town, we are stopped by an Orc guard. The guard is speaking in Draconic and I am able to speak back to it. I suggest it speak in common to Doots, when it speaks in broken common to him. Tonton suggest through Psionic link that the guard speak to him in Draconic, and then Tonton can speak to Doots through a Psionic link to him about what the guard said and then Doots can speak to the guard in common . . . . . . OWWW MY HEAD HURTS ! ! !   The guard and Doots speak in Giant for 30 minutes, which I do not understand. But I do hear our group name Cryptic Kabal said many times. We get paid for the Dire Lion body and the three Digestors as well. 10,000 Collorium Gold Pieces (yellowish color), and a blue with design Tier III Bag of Holding. As the conversation is ending and the guard being all excited about something, Doots and he shake hands, when Doots start to shrink to a tiny size. HEHEHEHE, his voice is high pitched. I catch him before he falls to the ground and place him on my head, as the guard says in Draconic that it is an unfortunate side effect from his family but should only last an hour.   We head to the "Pillow and Drink" Shanty place where Long Nose is hosting, scaredly, for Uthem and his guards. I order 3 drinks for us as Minion goes straight to bed. Uthem tries to cast Dispel on Doots and only succeeds in making Doots and Uthems hand attracted to each other like magnets. Long Nose brings out the Bubbling Dark Special Drinks, I am the only one this time that is able to down it with no issue.   Doots and Uthem have a conversation about slaves and sales. An agreement is made about selling Minion to Uthem, I am not allowed to eat the dog. We get 2,005 GP and a magical Ration Box in trade. Uthem's guards carry the bound, tied, and gagged Minion off. I collect the remaining items from minion and the dog, which I do not eat. Doots and Uthem continue their conversation about Seji and his war against some Thrycrene, I think, and how the poop from Thrycrene is poisonous. Uthem leaves.   Long Nose is now in a better mood and offers us a show and drinks, but we need to follow him. We all follow him out the front and around to the back of his place to a dark door. As we enter there are Trolls all sitting and drinking facing a stage. A show starts and a board on strings comes out with a thin veil wrapped around it, doing a burlesque show ? ? ? At the end of it Long Nose appears near us and asks if we liked the show of his wife the cloth doing a board show ? ? ?   I buy a Long Nose Troll sized Health Potion, and am warned to only take sips from the wine bottle sized purplish/red fluid with insect parts floating in it, for 200GP. At which point we three decide to go shopping near the Southern gate.

Grand Vomitter

I cast detect magic and all I see is Uthem glowing blue, which I say he looks like me, getting an odd dirty look. Hahahaha   We arrive in the evening at a city that looks like a shanty town, Uthem leads us to a Troll ran tavern, owner is Long Nose. Doots and Tonton go inside to arrange bed and food. Uthem gives Doots a current location quest list. While outside Minion, the new team member, and I spot across the way 2 women and a tall elk horned large headed person walking, I sense no hostility from them. Uthem leaves with his guards, when all of a sudden Doots runs after him, I follow Doots.   Doots asks about Uthem's odd/unique appearance, maybe a Snow Dwarf body modifier. Uthem replies "NO", Doots wants body modification. I take a few steps back hearing about the high cost of this if Uthem performs this. Doots pays the fee himself for the service to be done tomorrow. Doots and I head back to the tavern to meet up with Tonton and Minion.   Minion Tonton, and Doots want to do two quests. I have no clue what is going on, and hear that Minion wants to hunt an Angry Chicken, while Doots wants to do a World Leader quest "Sea Haggis Hunting". Doots goes to bed after we decide to do both, he thoroughly cleans his bed, followed by Minion. Tonton and I order the Hoggis Displacer Beast meal. Which has everyone, all Trolls, amazed as we Tonton and I devour it all with out issue. He and I then order the Swallowers Delight, with even more stares from the Trolls, Long Nose says if we finish this we get to stay and eat for free, which Tonton and I down it without issue. I order Tonton and myself some Tough Brew, that is what Tonton is able to sip down, where I have to run outside as I unable to hold it in anymore. Going to bed ourselves, and having good dreams as a good end for the day.   In the morning Long Nose is drinking some "Root Tea", which I take some of. I have a new nickname in this place, "Grand Vomitter". Minion and Tonton go to the north gate to wait for Doots and I as we go to Uthem's camp. As we arrive at Uthem's place he says he is ready for Doots but I am not allowed to watch. I see the guards are around a fire playing games and eating fish. I attempt to be cute to get free food, and fail horrible. After a few minutes Uthem is done and Doots now has a Long Red 3rd arm under his normal right arm, and it has claws.   We all meet up at the North gate and head out. After a few hours of walking it is nearing evening, all of a sudden we see a ?Chicken? 7 miles away. As we start heading towards it, I go into Hide and Move Silent mode. When we are half a mile away, the others notice larger foot prints than the chicken could make. Behind us we hear a noise and two foot prints appear but no creature is visible.   Minion attacks the foot prints with fire and entanglement, which makes the creature appear. Now seeing it, we all notice that it is Mama Chicken, and we were tracking Baby Chicken. Tonton runs up and starts eating MC's feet. Doots starts playing support as usual. I attack Mama with an adhesive crush. MC fights back aiming at Tonton, as Baby now is trying to run at us. I am able to finish Mama Chicken and put a hole in it's chest. As Mama is dying she lets out a loud death cry, which makes Papa show up right next to us. PC tries to attack me and fails, so stick out my tongue at it and go "THPPTPTTHP".   Minion entangles PC, and Tonton goes to eat its feet like he did with MC. All of a sudden BC appears next to me pissed that I killed it's Mama. I attack Papa before turning my attention to Baby. Papa attacks me, and takes some of my blood acid damage. Doots' playing has been so intense that he is attracting beasts from all around that we can hearing roaring. Doots lowers the volume to stop attracting them.   Tonton and I are getting really hurt fighting Papa and Baby, Doots stops his playing to cast heal on us, so that we can continue to fight. Tonton takes out papa Chicken, at which Baby Chicken tries to run from us. Doots is able to kill Baby with a crossbow 160 ft away.   After we collect all the bodies we decide to camp out here as it is dark out and we plan to back to the city in the morning.

Melvin Departs

Gregs Maritom has called for an award ceremony, so we are all to pack up our stuff and march to them. As we are packing Neph and Ultimus bring over a Cat riding a Dog. They are introduced as a new member to our group, "Minion". He is a small Rakshasa, all he has done so far is ask us all many many many questions. Doots has said I am not allowed to eat him.   Trollsbane, Doots' frog or toad, has shown up to be our representative in charge of a town that Gregs Maritom has gifted us. We give all our items to Trollsbane to sell on our behalf, 68,000 GP worth of items that we sell for 2,000PP. As Ultimus is leaving to start the march with Neph, he says the Aboleth we say we killed is not really dead and that Aboleths do not forget faces and hold grudges for a LONG TIME. Is that a forewarning?   We start our three day treck to Gregs Maritoms' Castle. Nothing happens along the away, at all, what a bore. As we near the Diamond City, I can see that it is a massive trading city. At the gate a small Kobold guard says that we have Diplomatic Safety, but must be on good behavior. As we continue our stroll to the castle, Doots stops us to talk to a Frost Giant, "Uthum King of the Giants", and a Golden Dragon Kin. Uthum gives Doots a warning that Melvin should stay away from him and away from the Dwarf King. Continuing the walk to the Castle we see a Second "Many Thinks" Adventuring Monster Guild, a brand new two story building, it makes me smile inside.   At the castle gate we see many World Leaders entering, Dragon Emperor, "Lythera" Pixie Queen, and royalty as well. A Tan Clan Elf leads us to our room for waiting until summoned, muttering to himself about what a pain this task is. Upon entering the rooom I see a small Kobold dressed as wait staff holding plates next to a large buffet table, I take and eat one of the plates he is holding. Tonton does the same, which causes the Kobold to faint. As we are eating, it is discussed that the Elf that lead us here is an assassin hired to kill a World Leader. I hide and move silently into the hallway headed to the Main Room. Doots, disguised as the wait staff Kobold is behind me. Entering the room a golden butter knife flies past me as an Amazonian Elf woman with a manly voice makes Doots return to his true form. Doots now naked is causing a stir among the World Leaders, and I am told to unhide myself, which causes even more gasps and stirring among the attendees. I try to explain our reasoning to the Elf, right before Zebrel magics us back to the waiting room.   Now back in the room I decide to just eat from the buffet, as Melvin and Tonton are playing some kind of game, Doots still naked is looking for his clothes, and Minion is fast asleep at the table. Just after Doots finds his clothes and dresses, another Elf opens the door and summons us to follow to the Main Room for awards.   The room now has changed from a dining event to an awards show with all the World Leaders in pews with the central walkway up to the throne clear. Upon the throne sits the Amazonian Elf woman with the manly voice, who is in fact Gregs Maritom them self. We are told again what our options are for rewards for the deeds we have preformed for "HER?" Doots replies stating that we have chosen Trollsbane to be the person in charge of the area awarded to us. We then leave the room as all the World Leaders start to shout at each other and causing more noise then when Doots and I walked in.   Back in the waiting room we find out that our next job is to go to Seji Lands and help there. Also a person named Uthum, oh yeah that Frost Giant person, will be giving us a ride to those lands. We head outside and find two carriages waiting, the second one is for us with our own wagon tied to it already.   As we are heading to a building that will transport us to the lands, we halt as Melvin is needed elsewhere and needs to leave us. We all say our goodbyes and well wishes, I am hurting and crying inside as my Brother is leaving for an unknown mission without me and for an unknown amount of time. With a somber mood about us we continue our move to the building one Original Member less. As we head into the building there is a portal there that transports us to the new land. The land we arrive in is a large field of dead vegitation.

I HAVE EVOLVED

I found myself exposed to lyrium over and over, finally the metal around the chest seems to start to have a slight blue glow I now feel that my magic has expanded, I am now what many would consider an Arcane Mimic. My advancement:   I now can take sorceror (as my mimic bloodline has been founded and will be passed onto offspring).   I gain the ability of arcane bloodline, When I bleed on someone they must make a Ref save DC (15), if they succeed they take half, if they fail they take 2d6 worth of acid damage and any magic items this hits will also take half the damage dealt. Normal items take full damage. This starts at level 10 for my first child-birthing story.   Hatred of a thousand slugs: Favored enemy (Vermin type) I gain a +2 bonus on Bluff, Listen, Sense Motive, Spot, and Survival checks when using these skills against creatures of this type. Likewise, I get a +2 bonus on weapon damage rolls against such creatures.   Magical understanding, I can now 3/day cast Detect Magic (CL 1)   Psuedopod growth: My pseudopods now glows slightly blue, doubling its damage dealt to 2d6+4 and giving it the effect of acting as a magical weapon when resistance is considered   Arcane Blood: Once per day, if a creature that I can see within 60ft of me casts a spell I already know. I can use an immediate action to cast the same spell back, sacrificing my highest spell slot available in exchange for the countering the spell. Spells limited to 5th level that this ability can effect. (edited)

Siege Job Done

After the Armory was destroyed, as we were told to do, Ultimus came running up to us asking for her boots and to say that Neph needed help. So we started to head toward the Castle, with the Vault, along with Ultimus. I go into my hide and support mode as Ultimus says that it was an ambush from the start. As we near and enter the Castle we all see that there is mass destruction all over the place from the gate being blown open and tons of guards bodies all over the place. The main Castle doors are wrecked, and as the others discuss what to do, I enter the doors to take a peek.   I see that there are riches of gold and expensive carpeting inside with more guard bodies, headless, through out the throne room. All of a sudden I hear a growling and see a large Aboleth above me. I jump and tumble backwards out the door telling the others what I have seen. We decide to scout the outside to find another way in and find a medium sized hole on the backside of the throneroom. Doots suggest, and we all agree, the he and Tonton go in through the front door as Melvin and I enter through the hole at the same time, to do a pinch move as Doots calls it.   I enter through the hole completely hidden ready for the fight. Melvin's eye glows blue as he levitates a broken statue piece in the middle of the room as a distraction, and draws the Beast to the center of the room. Tonton Rages and charges the Beast. Doots starts to play. (here I am going to add his lyrics to the notes as it is an awesome song about us)   Original by I Fight Dragons "The Geeks Will Inherit The Earth" "The Monsters Will Inherit The Throne"   I remember trying to talk to you in common Couldn't even get a look cause you were too cool But now we're older were playing by the new rules We lived and learned!   'Cause as time moves on We find we belong And then in the end   We were the ones you used to make fun of We stayed all alone instead of fallin' in traps We never got the chance to be proven We didn't even dance but here's the thing: We got the scars We got the money We need some sun but I'm tellin' you honey That the monsters will Mo-mo-mo-mo-mo-mo-mo-mo-mo-monsters will We will inherit the throne {Cryptic Kabal will inherit the Throne} The monsters will We will inherit the Throne {Cyptic Kabal will inherit the Throne}   Everybody tries to tell you that your different So you run away and wonder if it makes sense But the day will come when you get a new chance Cryptic Kabal’s turn!   And you know you'll be Much more then they see In time you'll find! We were the ones you used to make fun of We stayed all alone instead of fallin' in traps We never got the chance to be proven We didn't even dance but here's the thing: We got the scars We got the money We need some sun but I'm tellin' you honey That the monsters will Mo-mo-mo-mo-mo-mo-mo-mo-mo-monsters will We will inherit the throne {Cryptic Kabal will inherit the Throne} The monsters will We will inherit the Throne [Doots Jammin'] We were the ones you used to make fun of We stayed all alone instead of fallin' in traps We never got the chance to be proven We didn't even dance but here's the thing: We got the scars We got the money We need some sun but I'm tellin' you honey That the monsters will Mo-mo-mo-mo-mo-mo-mo-mo-mo-monsters will We will inherit the throne {Cryptic Kabal will inherit the Throne} The monsters will We will inherit the Throne {Cyptic Kabal will inherit the Throne}   As Tonton charges the creature has been drawn to the middle of the throne room and as Doots starts to play, the Beast turns to Doots. Out of nowhere a Raven enters the room and goes to Doots, who for a fraction of a second stops playing and then returns to playing with even more vigor. The music is so loud and moving that it can be heard through out the town and being sung by others far off. Tonton now has reached the Beast and bites it, which makes the creature cast a glimmer effect and hits Tonton hard.   I have now made it to the Beast and do a massive adhesive slam to it and then grapple onto this 60ft long creature, barely holding on. Now inside the glimmer effect I see Tonton is raging to Doots rather than the Beast, I psionically yell to all about this. Melvin flies in to the glimmer effect and cast Obscuring Mist and this helps us greatly in the fight against the Beast (Aboleth). Doots reacts by downing a Special Ale and we all become invisible and his playing intensifies even more.   Tonton is now able to return to his normal state and attacks again the Beast, losing his invisibility. I try to adhesive slam the Beast, and also lose my invisibility. During my failed attacks I noticed a blue glowy thingy on the back of the Beast.   All of a sudden Doots Yells "RUN WE'RE FUCKED!"   As Doots and Melvin are still invisible, they escape easily. Tonton escapes with some ease as well. Where I do not get away so swiftly. The Beast uses the last of it's chance to strike at me multiple times, taking a great portion of my health in 3 hard blows. I do escape and drink a potion to regain some health, running to the backhole (haha).   Apparently I am the only one that went out the hole, as the others ran to the vault. I yell an insult at the beast trying to draw it towards the hole rather than have it go to the vault, I fail. At the same time Doots tries twice to open the vault door failing. He then Kicks the door out fo frustration, as he turns the other direction, and the door opens.   I see Neph appear out of nowhere near me carrying a body, I then Psionically tell the others this. Just as the others hear this from me they see that the vault is empty and try to run back out of the building. Melvin and Doots run to the hole as Tonton runs to the front door. I fail to delay the Beast from following Tonton with taunts, but do get Tonton to notice the Beast right behind him with a missed SFBPB (read Special Bullet).   BOOM KABANG EXPLOSION HERE AND THERE   Melvin and I are able to tumble/fly to safety, when all of a sudden the Castle is blown up. ( DAMN IT ULTIMUS )   Next thing I know we are all in the courtyard of the castle watching it collapse on itself.   Doots Yells "CRYPTIC KABAL HAS SLAIN AN ABOLETH ! ! ! "   I am not allowed to go back there and eat some of the Beast, Ultimus and Doots tell me it is bad. Bah Humbug. We then all walk back to camp   Before we enter the camp a Giant, I think he is called Ghost, Offers us money so he can take/loot the town. As Doots puts the money in my mouth it starts to numb my tongue and I spit it out. Red Lerium fake coins. We then take the fake magical money to Neph to report this and what we completed in the town.   As we near his tent we see Ultimus and he lets us in the tent and she joins us. After we explain everything, Ultimus buys the coins from us with the money we were supposed to be paid with anyway, another fake coin switcher-roo, but with real coins this time. We get paid a total of 20,000GP. We also find out that our job with Neph, his Mercenary group, and Ultimus is complete we are to part ways soon. Neph hands Doots a letter that is from Gregs Maritam.   The letter is a long winded thank you with options of how to be rewarded for our work. As we are discussing this Neph asks/tells us to get out of his tent. Outside we continue to discuss our options. 1. We all agree to work for Gregs Maritam and run/own a large piece of land, pay taxes and follow orders when needed. 2. One of us does the above. But anyone agreeing to work for him most not be linked in anyway to any other Lord. 3. We receive Compensation of the above in a single value transaction.   Doots, Melvin, and Tonton come up with the idea that we use a representative for us that can be our second option person. Doots calls the toad Trollsbane. Trollsbane agrees to terms with Doots that we get 50% of all earnings and he is the representative of us in compliance with Gregs Maritam.   The Giant returns and before he can say we get to pick one item I say "We each get to pick one item" from the stuff he found in the town. I grab a Wand of Wall of Fire, as the Giant hands Doots a fang from the Aboleth. I ask Doots if I can lick it and as I do I gain the knowledge of the spell Dominate Person.   We all then head to our tent for much needed rest as a Massive Table full of food is set there just for us.   During my sleep I grow and something Special happens to me.

My First Spell

After the explosion we all meet up in the center of the fort to bury the armor we found, and I make a sled to pull all the weapons. As we are doing this I notice something moving among the trees, maybe Hobogoblins. 4 of them are there, then Tonton lights the forest on fire, while Melvin cast a copy of Tonton. I am confused by the copy not sure if it is Tonton also, but am guided away with the others to continue our trek.   As we continue our scouting trek to the battle-front, away from the road, we can hear the battle ahead getting louder. All of a sudden we hear growling from the fields we entered and see 6 lion type humanoids stand up, 3 male and 3 female. I am able to sense that it is only 2 male and 2 female, and I am able to tell that they are in a protective stance rather than a fighting/hostile stance. 1 male is light maned as the other, duh duh duh, is dark maned. I ask Doots if I should try to communicate psionically with them, he says yes. The light maned one is all of a sudden confused and on edge, where the dark maned one is able to understand what is going on and communicate back in broken signs and common.   Doots asks me to ask the dark maned one if he wants to come with us to the battle, but he is weary and they Dire Lions leave. So on we got to the battle-front, where the rest of the Mercenaries catch up to us, soot covered for some reason. Neph, seeing us, asks us to join in a meeting. Melving, Tonton, and I wish him luck and go off to scout out the castle from afar and to set up our tent.   After the tent is set up with our sled outside I put all the weapons we collected in the tent, 22 copper long swords, and any other items we deem not needed for the battle ahead. Looking to the castle we can see 2 main gates for entry that are closed an heavily guarded, but the walls barely have anyone on them.   After the Neph meetiing is over, Doots, along with Ultimus (she), comes to us telling us what the plan is. We are to launch Tonton from a catapult, make as much noise as we can, attack and destroy the armory, and then help when and where needed. Of course Tonton is excited about the chance to fly and destroy things, Melvin is questioning the logic of this, Doots is defeatedly resigned to do it, where I like Tonton am excited by the plan. And of course Ultimus, the battle junky, is really excited about the plan SHE came up with.   WHOOOOOSSHHHH ! !! !!!   While we are flying to the castle we see Neph blow up a gate and enter. We are all tied to Tonton, Melvin tied being pulled, as we fly through the air. Melvin is screaming sounding like he is dying, Tonton is bellowing with intimidation, and right before we land I cast my first spell at the building. MAGIC MISSILE away.   As we land, Melvin has detached himself from the tow line, Doots immediately starts playing a very rousing rendition of "Survive" adding our groups name "Cryptic Kabal" to the lyrics, Ultimus has slipped from her boots and is not seen anywhere, Tonton and I get ready to battle. When Tonton decides to jump on the roof we have landed on and go through the roof to enter the armory for an amazing entry of shock and awe style battle.   Tonton and I are now on the ground floor, 2 floors below the roof, where we can see that the inside has a ringed second floor along the walls with 10 Warriors and 2 Purple Knights on it. I attack a pillar in the hopes of crashing it down, when Tonton eats a fire eclair and the fires it at the second floor. Doots has perfected the art of musical support so well that his song can be heard being sung by others in the distance, and we all feel a major boost to our attacks. I climb on Tonton's back and start firing SFBPB at the Purple Knights, Tonton continues with the fire shooting, Melvin does some acid splashes.   The First Knight I hit has a bullet stuck in his shoulder, as he and the other Knight try to shoot their arrows at Tonton and I. The other Knight gets hit twice with my bullets and then I yell "Your Mother Was a Hamster, and Your Father Smelled of Elderberries!" Which he then rips his helmet off looking al offended and pissed off, due to the fact he is a Hamster-Lycan, HAHAHAHAHAHA.   Tonton then starts throwing javelins and skewering the warriors left and right. Melvin's acid splash then removes (read melts) the Knights helmet, and he TOO is a Hamster, HAHAHAHAHAHA.   The Knights then attack Melvin, which hits him, and now I am very angry at them attacking my brother. I vow "I AM GOING TO EAT YOU!"   Tonton is able to incompacitate the Knight that hit Melvin, and Destroy the other Knights right arm. I attempt to Kill the Melvin hurting Knight and Tonton does it for me, but I do get to eat his head out of vengeance. Melvin flies up and out to the front barred doors and unbars the doors for us FLEXING his tentacles as the doors swing open, Tonton and I FLEX back as "A JOB WELL DONE, BROTHER". As the fire rages on inside the armory we all collect what we can and exit. That is when Ultiimus shows up again asking for her boots, and saying "Neph needs our help!"

We Are SCOUTS

The body EXPLODED . . . . .   Then it was gone, the runes stopped glowing, and all the magic in the area disappeared. WE WON!   As we climb out of the tunnel back into town, we find the Goliath from earlier hyping up the crowd about our success killing the Crazy Lady. Doots immediately starts playing his instrument and says "We are the Cryptic Kabal." After a bit of time we head back to camp.   We arrive as Tonton is waking up, I grab food and go straight to sleep. After the sun has risen and then set we all wake up and head back to town, as there is a party going on. There are multiple stages with groups playing songs all over town and people dancing. As we enter the town I take to hiding and defense for the party. Doots walks to the nearest stage and starts playing "Hail to the King" (avenge 7 fold). Tonton lets some kids on to his back to give them a better view.   All of a sudden Doots stops playing and asks everyone to leave town calmly. A guard comes up to him asking him to stop riling the people to a frenzy, Doots gets away from the guard when the guard tries to arrest him. All of a sudden a Big Guy yells "Gregs Maritom is Dead", freaking everyone out. The Big Guy, Goose, walks up to us as Doots leaves to get some Tonton Scoots. I get an uneasy feeling from him and stay hidden and flank him in-case of an altercation. Doots returns after some time that Goose uses to ask Melvin and Tonton many questions, that Tonton takes long winded advantage of. After handing over the scoots, Doots (HEHE that rhymes) pulls out the mask he and I found earlier and asks if it is his. Goose replies that it is his and that it was stolen from him a few days ago, Doots returns the mask. Goose starts to leave and as a last parting jab says, "You do not want to mess with me, yet."   Doots informs us that Neph and all the mercenaries are packing up and heading out. We all head back to pack up and get ready ourselves, I collect a Tonton scoot. As we are packing Doots starts to play a tune to help motivate all and it does help passing the time. As we start to head out we are made to be scouts for the march. During the march we see in a clearing a burnt Fort, and go to investigate.   As I climb the walls to get in, I see burnt bodies in armor with weapons all over. There is a central tower with tents all around it, and Doots pushes open the ruined gate for the rest to enter. As we investigate Doots and Tonton gather armor and weapons from the bodies in the fort. Melvin and I enter the central tower to find more bodies all with a single hole in their heads and blackened eye medallions with green gems in the around their necks. In the tower we find a chest on the ground floor with a smooshed Hobgoblin inside it, dead. On the second floor we see a large Hobgoblin with silver hair and gold plate metal dead in his chair. There are also 2 chests up here locked, Melvin sees they are trapped and tries to make them safe. I get the mace to smash the locks hoping not to trigger the traps. As I return to smash the locks Melvin rushes (Flies) out the window and tells the others to take cover. I swing and BOOM   All the armor and weapons Melvin and I collected on the bottom floor have melted and everything else is burnt beyond use and recognition.

The Underground Party?

I am in a glass jar (prison) at a court for my actions. I still feel some side effects and sick. Tonton is unavailable, Doots and Melvin are on my side but can not add any proof on my behalf. The Lycan I stabbed has a simple request, not to be stabbed again. I am freed, and boy do I feel guilty. Ultimus wants us, damn it, to go with him and cave dive killing necromancers and/or Trolls. Ultimus has a look of wanting to burn the world, as he mumbles about looking for tar and or oil.   As Doots, Melvin and I walk to town, I give them both each one of my Azure Daggers of True Strike. We arrive at Think's place and he is asked to join a drinking competition against Think. Think seems already a but intoxicated, and I ask to take Doots' place. I have to morph into a Pixie shape to get in the chair, but have some trouble with the weirdness of the shape. 10 gallons of ale is put infront of me and Think, who starts immediately, so I follow suit using the provided straw. I win even before I get half way through it all but do not stop until it is all gone, tasty. After that the woman working at the place gives Doots the vials he asks for and I get some more potions as well. We then head back to camp.   After Doots does what he wants to camp, I still follow trying to stay out of trouble, we head back to town. Once there we see that Think's place is completely distroyed and there are bodies all over the place, Think is skewered on the wall. I run in to check on him, he is dead dead. On the wall is written: "Many Legs, The Deadly Smile" My response when I hear it read out loud is, "I didn't do it!" The bar woman and the strange customer that were there earlier are not there among the bodies. We all search the place, I find some coinage. Melvin finds a weird staff at the top of the stairs floating all by itself, which Doots throws a cloth over. I run back to camp to get Neph.   "NEPH, THINK IS DEAD. ALL ARE DEAD HELP!!!!!"   Neph comes out of his tent in PJ's, grabs his swords and me and runs back to town. Once back I found out that Deadly Smile is a person or group that hates and kills. We all start to search again and I can smell a sweet sickly smell, I also can detect a vibration from the staff at the top of the stairs, and from the basement. Neph rips open the doors to the basement and a chest comes flying out and smashes open against the wall. I grab half of what spills out while Neph takes the rest.   Oh I almost forgot, Tonton is sleeping back at camp during this whole adventure.   Neph and Melvin decide to go down the stairs into the basement to check it out while Doots and I go outside to check on things there. While I was gone getting Neph, Melvin and Doots saw a bone, ghostly face with glowing eyes come from the alleyway. I am following Doots hiding and ready to strike at anything trying to attack him. As we enter the alleyway we hear footsteps approaching us, it is just Ultimus. Doots finds a mask with orange/red hair on the inside where a mustache would be, while I spot huge footprints on the ground. We then head back in.   Hours later, Melvin rejoins us in the destroyed tavern, just as the sun is rising. We decide to head back to camp. Just outside of the town we run into Ultimus again who is with a group of mercenaries carrying tar, and they same upset. Melvin and Doots start to ask Ultimus some questions about Neph, where Ultimus admits he is a boy and Neph thought he was a girl. We tell him what we were doing and Ultimus runs off after Neph. The Lycan mercenaries start heading back to their camp and I yell "You forgot you Tar." They turn around to grab it, and I notice that the tar turns into a barrel of arrows. We then start running after Ultimus.   In the tunnel below the destroyed tavern we find Ultimus fighting Neph, when Neph yells that the Ultimus he knows is a girl. And the Ultimus in front of us is a laughing maniacal weirdo attacking Neph. Doots starts doing his think, jamming away at tunes to boost our efforts. Melvin lays a trap to protect him and Doots. I run down the tunnel to attack the Crazy Lady.   As I am running toward her to attack, she falls back and just before I can get to attack she disappears and reappears by Melvin. Which angers me as now I have to run all the way back to attack her. Throughout all of the attacks hitting her, she is constantly morphing and changing what she looks like, Troll arms, Elf ears, Purple Tentacles.   All of a sudden a Orange Haired, Kilted, Grey Skinned Goliath comes down and hits her hard in the face. As it does not kill her on the spot he decides to run back up the stairs. Throughout the entire fight so far Doots has gotten louder and louder with his supportive playing and has drawn a crowd above ground that we can now hear chanting and dancing along with his playing.   As I am now close enough AGAIN to attack her I hold on to pull her into the trap Melvin laid earlier. Neph is shooting arrows at her and grapple hooking her staff while Doots and Melvin are backing up. All of a sudden, before I can pull her into the trap, SHE EXPLODES . . . . . .

I ate something and, WHOOPSIES!!!

So Skeletons were attacking the town and our entire camp heard it. The nasty woman was swarmed, and died, by them. We all decided to attack the skeletons. And before I knew it Tonton was spinning wildly, I got a wee bit hurt, and killed all of them directly in front of us. I climbed his back for an added effect of attack. All the while, Doots is playing "Princess of the Universe", I have no idea why but it does lift our spirits up.   Tonton runs to the next site of wolf skeletons and I get a chance to attack and kill one with a double strike.   Then two massive skeleton creatures show up and attack the gate guards, Doots, and Melvin. Doots is able to hold his own while the guards hide in fear. I find out later that they were Owlbear skeletons. Melvin took to the sky and hide doing shadowy damage.   We, Tonton and I are surrounded by 5 skeleton wolves. Tonton does another spin attack taking out 4 of them and wounding the last one. I finish it and eat the head with the shattered red crystal in it. WHOOPSIES.   I find out that Doots was able to avoid many of the attacks from the Owlbears and even defeat one all by him self, Go Doots.   Sooooo that skull I ate, well it just so happened that the shattered crystal had a bad side affect on me. It seems that when I ate it made me think that one of the mercenaries was my mortal enemy. I was of the belief that he was there to kill me, and so I attacked him.   I did scream "What is it that I have done to offend you so much that you have come here to kill me? Well I am not going to take this laying down." I am able to land one hit on the Lion Lycan Mercenary. But then, the wolf has taken all of the attention of my mortal enemy an is now in my way of having the attention. IT MUST DIE.   It seems that Neph has seen me attack one of his men and hits me in the head so hard that I die. THE END, not.   Neph knocked me out with one blow so bad that I dropped like a sack of skulls, lifeless, not moving, no dreaming for me.   WHOOPSIES.

Shopping Trip

So we all wake up for another day, except TonTon, for adventure. Or so I thought that is what this day would hole for us. Come to find out even Neph, I learned the spelling of his name, and Ultimus were gone from the camp. So Doots decided we should go to town and see if we can do any shopping.   At the gate into the town there are Kobold/Dragon Kin as guards. We do find out that there are three possible locations to go to. Golden Flame, a general wonderous magic store. Kinky Buckle, the magical and regular armor store. Brand and Boil, the weapons store.   Going to the Golden Flame first I read a sign "For those of the Stone, walk freely amongst the Plane." and we meet Baldy Greybelt. He has nothing we want, but is able to send us to a place we are looking for to buy rings. Chisel and Cut Guild and we need to talk to Oros. Oros supposedly makes magical rings and such on request. We get there to a major rundown building, door literally falls down, and some old codger tells us he no longer does that and only works for The Black Merchant Company.   But wandering around we find Humble Hoard Guild across the street from Gardens Grace Guild. As we walk into the H.H. Guild a Goliath named Think hands us some ales, chugging them we find they are heal potions. I did buy some potions this time. Talking amongst ourselves and with Think I think that the black merchant is actually a group of necromancers and they work with or own Chisel and Cut.   As we walk outside planning on going into the guild across the street, some Kobold woman starts screaming at us and says we can not enter the guild because we are not the right kind. After some shouting, morphing, threatening she yells for the guards. We end up being surrounded by them and we start to try to talk our way out of the issue we are in. The Kobold woman says she is the mother of some big shot Lord or something.   As we continue to try to talk our way out of it, Neph and Ultimus show up. Neph uses his political power to have the guards walk away, and we are told off by Neph to not do anything like that again. We do find out that Usk'dnar, pronounced Uskenar, is an Emerald Kobold and owner of the Kinky Buckel and is related to Corix. Who Corix is I have no clue.   On our way there we come to the open street market that has "acquired" goods for sale, including magic rings and amulets. We are shown them all and do not find anything of interest or need. So we continue on our way to the Kinky Buckel. She is a funny odd Kobold, but nice because she gave some weird bacon. She says she wants to charge us 16,000 GP for Melvin's and my armor to be worked on. She does inform us of a way to get a 50% discount, all we have to do is have Neph go on a date with her Granddaughter.   We then go to the Brand and Boil, where neither Doots or Melvin are interested in anything so I get to ask about my weapons. Alas a Dragonkin by the name of Myralyth does not stop talking for long moments after I ask one question. I then see a sign that says "Do not talk to Myralyth". I then see a dwarf resting on a chair and ask him if he can answer my question, he informs me that he wants to charge 26.000 GP for the work I am asking for.   We decide to go back to camp and see if we can find a way to earn oodles of money. I see Sen and ask about the amulet Doots has been wanting all day long. He informs me that he sold all the ones he acquired, but Neph has an extra one. So I go to Neph, who is in the middle of a heated meeting and ask about the amulet. I am told to come back later.   Shortly after that the meeting is over and we get to talk with him. Asking about the amulet he gives it to Doots, and I inform about the Granddaughter wanting to go on a date with him and it will help us out. He finds out the truth about the 50% discount and still says no. Ultimus finds out about our wanting to earn more money and hands over a list:   Goblin Extermination - 25gp per ear Hobgoblin Extermination - 100gp per ear Ironhide Armadillow hunt - 8,000gp if dead, 11,000gp if alive Mistveil Hounds Pup Capture - 13,000gp per young pup captured and brought back to guild Flower Picking - 40 of each Rosmium, lesmium and plemlium - 2,040gp The Masked Elders Killed or captured - Reward to be given by Gregsmaratam Musical Enterntainment at Festival - 5gp per hour for week of performances 24/7 available Hedgewarders Guards - 2,000gp to travel to small town not marked on map Proficient hunters needed - teaching for new merchants - 4,000gp per day   It is the list from the nasty guild were the Kobold woman was at.   Kliften is the cook of the mercenary camp. Rolf is a Rocksasha and a mercenary.   As we walk back to our tent we hear screaming, running, and fighting. A hoard of skeletons is attacking the towns gate where we see the horrible Kobold woman getting buried by a pile of them.

Goblins? What Goblins?

So after we were teleported to this other land and met with some Lycans, we were told to sit and wait for a little bit as they were not fully ready for us. In that time I learned a new language and mastered Psionics, so I can talk with Ton Ton. I still have the feeling Zebrel wanted to get rid of us, even though we were helping. And being sent here was his way of saying sit, spin, and wait somewhere else.   Neff, or Nef, or Neph, I don't know, did say we were to be trained and get ready for a battle, Ultimus the battle junkie is to be our trainer. So now here we are following Ultimus off to begin our training. Melvin not feeling well was left behind and a 10 foot tall Fey Troll joined us.   While walking to our objective, Ultimus tells us our training is to begin with goblin hunting. After walking for an hour through the woods we see down a cliff a tent in trees town. Ultimus informs us that is our objective, and all we have to do is survive, kind of odd, but ok. Then ha mentions that surviving for longer than a minute will break the record compaired to all the other adventurerers he has tried to train. WTF, you dumb battle junkie.   The BJ Ultimus chops down a tree and it alerts ALL the goblins down below that they are under attack and see us. Ultimus chops down another tree and starts to do some work on it.   Seb, the 10 foot tall Fey Troll, shoots some of the goblins with his bow. Then TonTon eats a fire eclaire and lights the entire tent tree town on fire and the floor of the forest as well, killing dozens upon dozens of goblins in one fell swoop. But the Goblins keep coming in groups up the hill. I try to wait for them to get close so I can kill some as well.   During this battle I morph into different things and taunt the goblins, but Seb and TonTon keep killing all the goblins trying to come up the hill. Doots is playing a song "Highway To Hell" to inspire us. After a while I start to feel the need to sing along with his playing.   A group of Goblins in fullplate armor start to attack us, 3rd wave, and TonTon decides as they are close to jump off the cliff and land on them. They all go splat and and possible remaining Goblins high tail it out of there as we, Seb and TonTon are too powerful to fight.   By this time Ultimus has finished building his catapult, large enough to launch TonTon. And then sees we are done with the battle, he wants to make TonTon pull the contraption while he pushes it.   When we get back to the Lycan encampment we are informed that Ultimus really messed up the mission. 1. He was supposed to take the entire unit with us to eliminate the Goblins, which we did as a small group. 2. We were supposed to collect Goblin ears as proof of killing them, Seb did that and saved us. 3. We were not supposed to light the ENTIRE forest on fire. 4. Neff is really pissed at Ultimus.   We did meet "Raba" the Lycan Doctor of the camp. In a weeks time we are to set of to battle and attack a strong hold. We earned a lot of money for the Goblin slaying, I have Melvins share with his concent. We earned 2500GP each.

Faywild

So we did not even get a chance. We were knocked out but some Stuck up looking Dwarf with a black beard, what a smug dick. While asleep I dreamed of slaughtering thousands of Spiders with my special SFBPB's. Then we all awoke in some open field with bright light and the smell of flowers all around.   There is a coin floating over each of our heads and try to grab the one above me, Stupid thing is just magic. Major tingling and discomfort when I touched it. Apparently we were brought here to do an escort mission. Frost/Storm/Stone, I do not know which, Giants need to be escorted to a fairy Queen.   Above way up in the air is a giant Pixie being chased by an air ship, "Give me your Beard Oil.", can be heard coming from the ship. This place is weird.   Tonton gets hit by some sort of projectile, which makes Melvin and myself hide, quicker than snail on pixie dust, in Tonton's neck folds. Doots warns us all that the Fay here feed off of our desires and try to trick us with anything. I am able to see through all the tricks as apples, coins, etc. al have toothy wicked smiles on them.   Main Giants name is Vulgeira.   We stumble, I guess, onto an open field in the woods with a bridge where 3 Fairy factions are fighting. Arguing about we should die.   Grig the Dimplebust faction lead by Malos. Nixie the Wrinkleflesh faction lead by Quinn. Pixie the Greenbud faction lead by Dunun.   Doots is able to locate the leaders among this chaos of hundreds of fay fighting. As things calm down by Doots talking to the leaders, Melvin and I leave the safety of Tonton's neck folds. Doots and The Giant request to see the Queen.   They all refuse, Malos being the loudest, because Doot's Mom messed up this world somehow. And Malos blames me for eating all different kinds of Fay. Doots is asked to choose a neutral type for superiority. The Nixie leader kills the others by his choice of true neutral. Which leads to the Fairy Queen, The Forgotten Song, show up. She then makes the airship just disappear.   The Queen and The Giant start discussing some politics so I lose all interest in the talks but do hear random words that sound important, but I have no clue what they are talking about.   Loxidon? War? Reggin Uthan (Giant Leader)? Dragons? Illithids? Toff Leader? Has a pact with the Queen?   Queen hates me for some reason, I could care less, I am bored.   Trollbane, Doot's mom's toad companion, is noticed by the Queen and she starts to choke him with magic, he dies. The Queen really really really hates Doot's Mom.   The Giants disappear when their talks fail. Then we all get threatened by the stupid Queen, her saying "One day we will be sent away to be hunted". I do not like her. She then leaves and we follow suit and get out of there.   A large spinning gold coin appears in front of us and we walk through it and return to the entrance of the cave leading to the underground city. As we walk into the cave we can see Zebrel there shocked and very much surprised, I find out the name of the underground city is Khabira Madani. Zebrel leads us to the castle through the throngs of citizens celebrating our return. At the castle we find out we have been gone a year, and of course Zebrel has another task for us.   Finding out where we have been and what we have done, Zebrel makes Doots another younger Trollbane, it is slightly poisonous.   Then the foodening happens, I ask for Grig, Nixie, and Pixie dishes. WOW who knew that they were that tasty. Now I see why they were all staring at me and keeping their distance, nom nom nom. I can now mimic all three of them.   The task Zebrel has in mind for us to send us out into the world for more experience. Gregs Maritome? Diamond castle? A lot of adventurers have died in the city we are going to. We are then teleported to an open field with a large camp nearby. There is also a massive castle in the distance, about a mile away.   The camp has Lycanthropes walking all about. One walks to us and says we are expected and need to meet their leader Neph. The reason we are hear is to learn about WAR. Stupid Rat Lycan thinks I am Luggage, his name is Ultimus, and he is to be our trainer. Neph says our first mission/training is a monster hunt. Ultimus after finding out I am not Luggage, really likes me for my ability to morph. Aaaaannnnndddd Ultimus is a MAJOR BATTLE JUNKY.   We are given a tent. . . . .

Beach Trip

Another day of adventure and working for the Underground City. We were served a breakfast of many tingly, wriggly, soupy stuff. And of course I then went off to Chuk Chuk's shop to see if I could upgrade my weapons, he was not there but at a meeting with Zebrel. I was able to have my punching daggers upgraded with a spell of True Strike on each of them that works once per day, for now.   The others went to find us a job to do for the day, and grabbed the one to clear a beach/water town and kill all that was there. So off we went above ground for the first time in a long time.   As we are walking through the forest to the beach I spot webs, that means SPIDERS MUST DIE. As I climb the nearest tree I spot 6 of them surrounding a webbed object. Using my sling with my special SFBPB bullets, I destroy the first one and use two more to kill a second spider. Three spiders surround the tree I am in and suck at shooting me with their webs. As the others join the fight, one spider flees over the hill to the beach. I drop on a spider and flatten it, as the others kill the remaining spiders. TonTon has decided to learn how to knock trees over, and uses this new skill to crush the last standing spider.   The webbed object from earlier is now gone, as we find a trap door to a small hollow underground with nasty tasting jars of honey and fish heads. I also sense a massive creature deep deep underground, that most likely grabbed the webbed object.   We head over the hill to the water town, and get ambushed right after TonTon lights the entire town on fire. TonTon uses his tree crashing skill again and the merlock dies from all of us attacking it. After that we realized that we had in a way cleared the town and decided to camp out on the beach for the night.   A few hours after the sun has set, we hear and see gnolls out on the water. They do not last long as Huge Tentacles from deep in the water grab them and they disappear. And that was that. I keep watch all night, and sleep on TonTon's back on the way home the next morning.   Zebrel and 2 guards are waiting for us as we near the town again. It looks like the have another gift for us with a feeling of dread and boding.

SFBPB Works

Shopping was the first thing on my mind waking up. I was hoping to get some better punching daggers. Walking to the Thunder Tooth smithy to see Chuk Chuk, I notice there are some Merlock-Illithid-Mindflayers about in the underground city. Like the Merlocks we were told about above ground. Getting to the smithy I find out that Chuk Chuk sold his speech and tongue for a smithy upgrade, which was under construction. He was, through an underling, able to inform me that he suggested I go to the meeting with Zebrel and then search for weapon upgrades.   So I and the others went to the castle of Zebrel, "Master" of the underground city. As we approach Zebrel is there smiling as two guards walk in with Sratt, the Morph Troll we were supposed to capture/kill. Zebrel then puts an Illithid worm in his eye and the guards leave with him. We are then individually spoken to by Zebrel and each given a gift. I receive a jar filled with a fairer fluid in it that has eyes floating around, and am told it is a "Shadow Sibling Simbiont".   We all leave, minus Doots, and are met by an underling of Zebrel and asked, read TOLD, to go find and capture a Hecatoncheires. I am informed it is not good to eat and a small creature. I ask for a sack strong enough to hold that creature, which we are given later. At the same time the bag is given to us Doots shows up passed out. As we place him on Ton Ton's back I notice a frog footprint. That is when Doots' head vanishes into a portal on the back of Ton Ton.   The portal leads to the Faywild. That is where Doots is from, and his land is on fire. I go through after him and my whole body starts to tingle from all the magic, and I leave. The frog, now a toad, shows itself, and ask to see Doots and is the Toad belonging to Doots' Mom. The toad is named Trollbane, and Doots' mom is named Valthana.   When Doots comes back through the portal we tell him about the assignment we were given, and I eat the jar that was given to me. We head to the caves to find the beast/creature and find it fighting SPIDERS, 4 of them. I am able to greatly wound one with my new specialized Spider killing bullets, and completely kill another. I am sooo happy my SFBPB work for killing Spiders. Ton Ton and Doots try to talk to the creature and succeed in capturing it in the bag.   We bring it back to the city and meet Zebrel who takes it from us and asks us what we want to be in a large treasure chest. I receive 1000 Platinum Pieces.   Random info: I see a small Morph Troll with an Illithid head at the castle.   I go back to Chuk Chuk and hand over my two punch daggers for a surprise upgrade.   On the way back to the Inn we all see a new business across the street. "House of Psionic Pleasures", it is run by Six. We all enter, and I am fed 71 new dishes.   3 hours of Psionic learned 10 minutes of Giant learned 893 PP earned   BTW: SFBPB = Spider Fishhooked Butt Plug Bullets

We finished our first assignment, kinda.

So as per usual we woke and set out for our adventure of finishing the assignment Zebrel gave us. At the exit of the city there was a genasi, Pierre, with a long thin moustache, like an evil idiot villain, that was having issues and somehow joined our party. I did get a taste of his hand, was lost in thought doing it, but it was a tingly taste so magical. Also, Melvin has grown some extra tentacles, 4 of them, with hands on the end.   Of course as we went down the tunnels to find the last of the Morph Trolls another new tunnel had shown up. We heard water running and found a sound trap, I ate a bell and can now morph into that as well. following the water tunnel, I of course walked on the ceiling, we found some stairs and another trap there. I scouted ahead and shot a bullet at a well armored and armed morph troll. The others caught up to me in the stand off, where I and Doots got some spear damage. Doots went off and arranged a truce, as well as an option to finish our assignment.   We ended up coming back to the city, without Pierre, and many dead morph troll bodies. We did run into a 'Demon'? He was looking for Pierre and said he is known as the man in red and works for Golden Heart Merchant Co.   An Illithid guard met us at the outskirts of the underground city and asked us if we had finished our assignment. We showed him the bodies we had with us and were then told of Merlocks on the beaches outside of the city above ground. They are apparently a problem that need to be taken care of. The underground city has become calmer and less guards roaming around.   And Melvin has become part of the City Higher Hive Mind.   2 hours Psionic learned 100 Platinum added Banded Agate (12GP), Red-Brown Spinel (120GP), Smokey Quartz (70GP) gave them to Melvin I think.   I am wondering what we will do next ? ? ?

I Hate Spiders

We had killed all the Trolls and had Spiders surprising us as we wanted to leave. 3 spiders on the ceiling in front of us and 3 spiders on the ceiling behind us. They shot Spider Goo from their butts and had us all Stuck Unstuck stuck Unstuck Stuck Unstuck That was basically what happened as we tried to fight them. Melvin was downed on the second time he was stuck. With my anger I made one Spider get smarter and run away. And another spider died after getting eaten by TonTon. Doots uses the Spider goo poison to hit a spider. The third Spider runs away after getting bite from me. All that was left was the three in-front of us. TonTon double bites and kills the first one, I stab the second one to death. The third Spider just runs away, and now I want Spider Butt Plugs to STOP them Shooting Goo. I get a spider foot/spear. We return to the Underground City with Toff still on TonTon's back. After trying to go to Zebrel a Platinum Armored Troll Guard stops us and speaks with us. I gained 2 hours of Psionic speech. The Troll guard says that Toff is a Master and puts him in a cage. He then gives us 250 platinum pieces each and confirming that we are still willing to hunt the rest of the Trolls. Melvin was revived during the fight and now has a flaming battle ax brand on his butt. After talking with the Troll guard, Melvin and I go to the Listening Knife Saddler magic store. On the way there I notice that the people are more on guard and that there are more guards in general all about. Fore the attendant of the store welcomes us and I buy a +2 Sling and order some Spider Fishhooked Butt Plug Bullets (SFBPB's). I paid 202 Platinum for it all. I hear that the Smithy name is Chuk Chuk, and that Morph Troll Magic Caster is Smart and Fat. We killed Fore by accident by giving him a name. A new attendant showed up and is called Fore, also. The next day I leveled up through the night and grew in size, and found out the Inn Trolls name is Pump. I went to the smithy store and had a Morph Troll skin armor made for me. It will change shape as I do and heal itself. I am really excited traveling with my new friends and having fun with them.   I HATE SPIDERS SOOOOOOO MUCH.

I am a Headhunter (NOM NOM)

So we woke up and decided to meet Zebrel. He asks us if we are still planning on taking on the other 20 Morph Trolls. We agree and head out back to the tunnels to continue our adventure. We see the last location we saw the first Morph Trolls completely collapsed, and follow the tunnel to the right.   As we entered the tunnel we found ourselves in trickling water. the tunnel first curved to the left and then to the right. at the end of the left curve there was a little land with mushrooms on it.   Tallus - red - healing Lerium - blue - restore magic slots Plenium - purple - poison   After the right curve we see it T's, and there is an Illithid Dragon statue with a floating ball drizzling water at the end. There are to minor Morph Trolls there marking and giggling at the statue. I climb the ceiling and get above the Troll marking the statue, I double stab the Troll and then fall onto it and eat its head, just as a Troll comes out of the tunnel from the right and it runs head long back into the tunnel screaming. TonTon destroys the other Troll.   From the left tunnel we hear about 10 Trolls running to us, and from the right we hear 4 Trolls running away from us. Doots does a Dragon-Roar to scare all the Trolls away. It works a little to well because an Illithid shows up from nowhere and is in full armor and ready for battle. It sees us and then disappears.   We then hear a giant from the left tunnel and we head down the right tunnel. After the second turn I notice the others have taken care of all the Trolls in there and hear more Trolls coming after us from the other tunnel. I decide to morph into the scared head of the 2nd Troll I ate and hide by the wall. Just as the lead Troll, the Leader of the group, comes around the corner I attack. I stab his ankles and grapple him so quick and consistent that the lead Troll gets terrified and runs back the way he came with the other trolls following him.   I added a growing/shrinking belt to the bags I put on TonTon.   We find out the statue with the water ball has a rune on it with psionic water creation spell on it.   We go to the tunnel to the left and come to another split, left to a spider cave, to the right the main lair. We go to the right, where I sneak along the wall, still morphed as the Troll head and wait. when the fighting starts I kill to by surprise, stabbing and grappling. TonTon kills the other two. There is a birdfolk Bride tryiing to fight the Troll Boss. TonTon and I defeat the Boss. TonTon ate many Trolls.   The birdfolk is Toff and answered Doots' questions. I got 150 GP.   8 minutes Troll language heard.   As we start to head back we run into 4 5ft tall and wide black and green striped Spiders,

Balthazar

He was the joining factor for the four of us. But he had a hidden agenda that he was unwilling to tell us. So there we were just enjoying a meal around a camp fire, Balthazar was very intent on his meal and did not see what we were doing. I wandered around looking for something new and interesting to eat. At first I found something shiny and metallic that made my tongue tingle. I gave it to Doots and Ton Ton. After that I found Balthazar's backpack and started to rummage through it, totally out of curiosity I swear. There was a map in there that look familiar. Doots and Melvin were interested in it as well. I looked almost like the dungeon I came from. We questioned Balthazar about it and he was sketchy about it. Until Doots got into his face and was forceful. Balthazar said there is an entrance but there is an apex monster there. So off we went, and then Balthazar got zapped, I saved his backpack. Then this Dragonish Illithid type creature spoke to us and then showed up. He is a smart kind Person named Zebrel. He asked us to go find some weird trolls and kill them and bring back a body. Zebrel has slave trolls that are dying and the morph trolls are a problem. We went deeper into the caves and found some dead trolls and then heard some in tunnels. We ended up fighting, and eating two of them. Ton Ton ate his ass cheek, I ate his head. Then we left after others showed up we did not want to mess with them. During this Time I heard Primal language for 1 minute and have read it for 1 minute as well. We got back to Zebrel and gave him the bodies, the mindflayer carrying Doots turned a sickly green tint for a short moment when he was carrying up the hill. Doots was given a summon stone for contact with Zebrel in the future. I was given a book about mimics information from around the world and it will stay up to date. Zebrel said I could even add info into it if I wanted to. Then we walked around the city and found: Thunder Tooth: smithy Dancing Mark: Inn/Tavern (Vell = female bartender, does not like us) Honored Carriage Candy: rations/candy TonTon's favorite place (Durrask = Owner) Listening Knife Saddler: General Substances Magic Item   Death Ore = addictive to magic users   I have eaten Troll currency, Tasty   I have heard about a mimic called City of Gold, apparently a huge mimic.

The Bright Above Land

I have found the way out of this underground maze. I have enjoyed my journey so far, puzzles, traps, lots of interesting things to eat. Then there was this bright light that I walked to and found that were no more stairs to climb, thankfully. The warmth I felt was different and comforting, and so many new sounds and endless options for directions to go. So I just went to the light, it was as good a direction as any. All the new smells, sounds, and sensations were a lot different than I was used to but it was fun, an adventure. Everywhere I looked a new thing to look at and eat. Then Darkness, in a bag with many other items. What a way to wake up from a nap. Oh well, at least there is food in here. Then after a day or so the bag opened and I was dropped on the ground. after the slight daze of being dropped on my head I looked up and saw a floating creature with one big eye looking at me. there were tentacles on it's head that looked like they had eyes at then ends. And it's mouth was very large and full of long sharp teeth. My first thought was, "I hope I am not it's food.". Well he did not want to eat me, and we learned to work with each other. I made my very first friend and got to know Melvin over the days we wandered together. Days later we ran into others, Doots, a pointy eared humanoid. Ton Ton, a large turtle that has little to say, but listens very well.. Then there is Balthazar, an odd humanoid that invited us all to a feast. Talking about the land we are on as an Illithid Island and that there are dangers all around.   I really hope we all get along and have a good time traveling together.

Gygax List of transform

Items Gygax can transform into: All items on list will have the same mass or weight as my character. All items Gygax has eaten and can therefore become. • Necklace (gold, silver, iron, bronze) • Ring (gold, silver, iron, bronze) • Quill • Backpack (small, medium) • Blanket • Pillow • Boots (leather with or without metal) • Shirt (linen and leather) • Pants (linen and leather) • Gloves • Cloak (wool, linen, leather) • Lantern • Plate (wood and metal) • Mug or tankard (wood and metal) • Plant (small with or without flower) • Stool • Torch unlit • Dagger • Small shield or buckler • Rock (various minerals) • Precious gems (various types and shapes) • Coins (various minerals and currencies) • Sling (with or without ammunition) • Crossbow broken (small) • Quiver (with or without bolts or arrows) • Utensils or tools in a pile • Rope • Candles unlit • Caltrops (non-lethal damage) • Parchment • Chainmail shirt • Bracers (leather or iron) • Chest armor (leather or iron) • Leg armor (upper and lower, Leather or iron) • Helm (leather or iron) • Pile of trash   • Treasure chest (tiny, 51 legs optional for mobility)

Meta Game Mimic Leveling

So this is me Kultach, writing about Gygax as the player and the plan, and maybe some history. There I was, bored and wanting to play some D&D, when I found the message board. There was a post about 3.5 monster Monday gaming, and I thought randomly open a book and play said monster. Thus Gygax the Mimic was born. I did many hours of searching books and the web for mimic info. Found much and selected, advantage Gygax, all the good stuff. Wow is there a lot out there. I really had no clue.   So the Gygax self written journal does have a lot of the info for mimics I will be using. Here I will add some for the future of Gygax. This is something that has been discussed with a DM, yes you know who I am talking about.   When Gygax became sentient, reasoning unknown as only the god(s) know why, he shrank to 1 cubic foot and and has AC adjustment bonus to counter the size AC plus or minus.   Lvl 1 1 cubic ft Nat AC 3 62 lbs Size of Grig Tiny Lvl 2 2 cubic ft Nat AC 4 125 lbs Size of Gnome Small Lvl 3 4 cubic ft Nat AC 5 250 lbs Size of Human Medium Lvl 4 8 cubic ft Nat AC 6 500 lbs Size of Bear Medium Lvl 5 16 cubic ft Nat AC 7 1000 lbs Size of Hippogriff Large Lvl 6 32 cubic ft Nat AC 8 2000 lbs Size of Frost Giant Large 5% Size Compression ability Lvl 7 64 cubic ft Nat AC 9 4000 lbs Size of Gorgon Large +5% Size Compression ability (every 10% compressed adds 1 to AC) Lvl 8 128 cubic ft Nat AC 10 8000 lbs Size of Adult Dragon Huge +5% Size Compression ability MAX Size Reached Lvl 9 +5% Size Compression ability etc............. Size compression maxes out at 90%   Sources for Character: Web . . . . . "Mimic Folk", dnd_wiki, dndbeyond forums, homebrewing Mimic, Monster Manual 3.5 pg. 186 Deities and Demigods 3.5 pg. 67 Players's Handbook 3.5 random all over for abilities Complete Adventurer 3.5 pg. 13 Arms and Equipment 3.5 YES

He Spoke to Me

So my feelings of Fharlanghn being my deity were right. He spoke to me about my past. He told me I had been a common mimic of old age of 305. He tried to tell me more but it was of a language I could not understand. "WHA WAHH WAW HAWH AHWA WAH WAH"

Where I came from...

Wow what an adventure it has been so far. I think I need to start even before my beginning as I am now. Many, many moons ago before I became sentient, I was a regular mimic in a dungeon. I would do the regular thing you would expect of a mimic in a dungeon. Disguise, trick, fight, and eat. Those were simple days. Over time I would hear stories about my kind and started to learn about others like me in other areas of the world. There were rumors, fables, tales, and stories of kinder, meaner, bigger, stranger mimics out there. As time went on for me, something started to stir in me about these other mimics out and about. Now you need to understand this was over a great many years, where I was actually growing and getting smarter, like a pet that learns more and more but not yet sentient like I am now. I do not recall how old I had become in that time, that is why I say my age is that of when I became sentient. Oh yeah, I suck at telling stories in the right order, but there is some sense and information all about in the telling of it. So here are the things I heard in the dungeon long ago about what is known of mimics. The first adventurer to find and succeed against a mimic was a brave soul named Gygax, I named myself after him. We are able to mimic stone and wood naturally, as well as inanimate objects. We are neither good or evil, just an animal is neither good or evil, just wanting to live. The smaller we are the more intelligent we are. We are always hungry but can be spoken to if found out. Throughout our years of living, we individually learn the languages adventurers and other creatures speak around us. A scholar, HaHaHa, by the name of Maerlun studied us as a creature and found the we have thick, tough skin as our defense, and classified us as aberrations. We are slow to move in most cases as we use our pseudopods to pull our selves along, the older and trickier we got we found the pedal, legs, way of moving. Our means of sensing our environment is by use of “eyespots” that sense heat, light, and vibration. We are good at grappling and using our sticky substance to our advantage. There are many types of mimics out in the wide world. An adventurer named Detweiler found a metal mimic that could change its color and shape to copy any man-made metal object. Most often found as money or rare and dangerous looking weapons. The metal mimic differs from most mimic types as the smaller it is deadlier it is. Deep in dark abandoned woods are house killer mimics. They disguise themselves as buildings and eat what ever creature enters it. They are slow and not very bright, but very effective and dangerous. Not much else is known about them. Later in years mimics learned to better alter their coloring to look more like objects that animals and adventurers recognized and wanted. Around this time also is when it was learned that mimics can not change their mass but only their shape. This is with the classification of the common mimic, rather than just mimic. It was also learned that mimics are immune to acid, mold, green slime, and various pudding monsters. There is a very odd story I heard about an adventurer the left the world and found a space mimic. The adventurer was known as B. Heard. He is known to have said that space mimics originally were enslaved for magic user’s purposes but became unreliable and abandoned in space. They learned the innate ability to cast spells like an illusionist. These space mimics eat as any other mimic but have adapted to eat magic as well, and learn new spells this way. Then there very few tales of greater mimics. Their origin unknown, but speculation says they are either very old or were altered by some strange magical means. Either way these mimics have become very intelligent and have learned to alter their shape to become multiple objects at the same time, like a shack filled with furniture. Later in time adventurers believed that mimics had lost intelligence due to their lack of ability to speak multiple languages, but in fact mimics had learned to hide this ability for preservation purposes so as not to be hunted for study. Around this time an adventurer and scholar named Bricken had ranked us in a list of top 12 most dangerous monster to encounter, he says obnoxious but I think dangerous is better. Once I heard a fable about a race of mimic folk. They a shy and private and very difficult to find. Thay are very good at hiding do not understand other creatures or beings’ belief in law. Not only are they hardy, but also very easy to speak with when confronted with one. It is said that these folk were either an experiment of magic or a magical experiment of fusing humanoids and mimics together. Either way both these ideas end the same, the experiment was left on its own when done with. Ah but I almost forgot about the adventurers that learned to be like a mimic, the mimic class. There are few that take this path. Those that do are prone to do so from birth, as most stories have told. They learn to imitate other appearances of creatures as well as mannerisms. Over time the more an adventurer becomes a mimic the more they lose of themselves. So that is what I had learned about my species in the dungeon I was inhabiting. This over time become something of a looping thought. The more the creature me had the thought the stronger the feeling that I wanted and needed something more than what I was doing. Then one morning “I” awoke to who I am now. I had shrunk in size from 15 cubic ft to 1 cubic ft. but I realized I was able to change and move about more freely and thinking was easier, there was also less of a creature drive to live and more of a sentient drive to learn and discover. That was when “I” was born and left the dungeon to explore and learn about the myths, fables, tales, stories, and legends about my species.   And now for the telling of my adventures as a sentient mimic.   Following from here on are tales fables and facts about Mimics from around the world.  

Entry for WorldEmber 2023

Competition Homepage
The Dead Silent Writer
Article template
Character
World
Silencia
campaigns
Monster Monday
Category
First Age Adventurers in Apex Monsters
Author
Kultach
Publication Date
11 Dec, 2023
Creation Date
11 Dec, 2023
Last Update Date
25 Dec, 2024
Visibility
Public
Views
80
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