240619 Aren't you a little short to be a fire giant?
General Summary
Welcome back intrepid readers. The Balder’s Gate Bugle had to do without this reporter’s story for a few weeks due to an unfortunate accident with a succubus, a polymorph spell and a stem of broccoli. Suffice it to say all is well now and I’ve been assured the swelling will reduce in time.
Now where were we? Let me throw out a few words to evoke your memories. Fire Giants, barricade, hammock firing ballistae, undead horde and the smell of fear and courage. Our heroes found themselves in a fight having traversed down a ramp towards the lower levels of Snurre’s Domain.
“Bugger,” said Drogon as he found himself in a corridor with two tonnes of giant flesh, and a lot of sweating members of Team Heavy Metal. Thorg had seen discretion as definitely the right side of valour and was backing up the corridor he had chased the giant down. He heard a lot of feet coming his way. He then saw the giant return with five trolls. Steeling himself he sent his feet to face the incoming horde. Drogon and Kurog set to face the other giant bearing down on them from the north.
Sentinel inspired Thorg to reach new heights and her rousing ditty had him all a quiver. Now, Sentinel and Drogon were safely tucked around a corner and sensibly using cover wisely. Not so our fearless and less sensible cleric, she was stood in the middle of the corridor and received a rock to the head for her troubles. And then a second rock, “Cause why not eh?” thought the giant.
Luckily for all the party, the rocks did indeed hit her head. Safest part to hit on Jude, in Sentinels opinion. Sentinel sprang into action and scared the living daylights out of the Northern giant and caused it to run away pronto. With Drogon firing arrows with his usual testicle-seeking bow.
The hairs raised on the back of Drogon’s neck and he turned slowly around to see a third giant approaching from the east. This huge Fire Giant carried two shields each filled with burning coals and he looked annoyed.
Jude found herself in a slightly different reality to everyone else and bent the rules of space and time to banish the dual shield wielding monstrosity. And for a while the universe forgot she had already banished another giant and should have been concentrating on that. Phew, lucky for the team, eh?!
Team heavy metal laid into their respective foes, swords flashing, supported by some insect clouds from Jude, the ever-thrumming bow of Drogon, and some mind snapping spells from Sentinel. Now you are all thinking that I have missed out one particular protagonist in our story. Griff the Fearful, Griff the Corner Hugger, Griff of the Backwards Walk. No, our usually melee shy wizard flew into action over the barricade and proceeded to join the proceedings with his plan no. 6. The animated coins trick. Team DPS had arrived and the battle’s tide was turned.
The giants were torn to shreds and both decided to run, leaving the trolls to fend for themselves. The comedy of fighting trolls is their ability to regenerate, cut them down and up they pop up 10 seconds later.
This gave Kurog and Thorg great delight as they got to kill the trolls over and over again in more imaginative ways. Competing with each other to perform the best move. The last blow was landed by Thorg, as he enacted a recreation of the battle of Horne, and how the warrior maiden Griselda had used a toothpick to bring down a minotaur. This was well received and was rewarded with a smattering of applause.
Bam! The universe righted itself and a huge Fire Giant reappeared by the ballista next to Sentinel, Drogon and Jude. Of course the giant picked Jude to hit, but missed. The team laid into the giant and he too soon saw that the band were too much for him and he legged it, over the barricade and straight into Griff’s waiting undead horde. They bit and scratched the giant as it ran but didn’t manage to stop him.
This just left the shield-wielder to deal with. He was brought back from his banishment to find himself surprised and surrounded. The giant got as far as “Oh, for f…,” before he was despatched.
Time was taken to patch wounds quickly and move on, the band needed to get these giants dead. Having them run off was bad for the nerves with fear of return forever present in their minds.
Team Sneaky, consisting of one sneaky bard, set off to explore whilst invisible and sneaky. She discovered a series of corridors with locked doors. These were obviously cells. The team moved up and investigate the first cell, finding two occupants. Both Elves, one dead and one only just alive. Jude stabilised the female Elf and they discovered that she was the Lady Luthiel and had been captured during the giant raid on the Elven town. She informed us that she was destined to be sacrificed to who knows what. She also told us that many of her compatriots were locked up here too.
The team found the corridors in fact made of a square, on the west facing wall, was another ramp down where giants could be heard trying mount a defence in case they were attacked. On that wall were also a number of doors. The team systematically unlocked the ones where they didn’t hear bad things. Some definitely had Gnolls and one a very different creature, yet to be explored. They found eight more elven warriors (including Captain Caladran) along with two centaurs (Arcturus and Fomalhaut). Jude healed up the strongest so they could defend the others. The team told the elves about the dead mercenaries on the level above., so that they could arm and armour themselves as best they could to make their escape. Rewards were mentioned…
The team also freed a Dwarf called Zogrin. Sentinel spent more than a good amount of time pressing him and questioning him. Seemingly still somewhat scarred by her experience with Ombi. Zogrin, declared Ombi a traitor with much vehemence and spitting. The dwarf was patched up and sent to rejoin his clan at Eagle’s Nest.
The elves, though proud, accepted being guided to the ramp back up. Luckily Sentinel was on point and saw a group of three Cloud Giants being led by one of the previously wounded Fire Giants. The team led a merry chase backwards and went the other way around the square, thereby avoiding the giant’s squad.
During their circuit, the team now had a number of choices of target. A corridor with a skull above it, entrance to the priest’s domain. Another ramp down on the north wall that most likely led to the object that was receiving sacrifices – evidence linked this to a possible dragon (burnt and sooty manacles found). Another corridor from whence the Cloud giants had come.
Once the elves were safely heading up the ramp, the team decided to press forward to the corridor leading to what they suspected were the Cloud Giant chambers. This ended in two doors. Drogon did his listen and detect thing but had now added smell to the list. He has a keen nose and has added that to his repertoire.
Opening the east door a crack, revealed humanoid sized furniture from the restricted viewing angle. The south door revealed giant sized furniture. The team quickly explored the giant room, knowing the occupants were out and about. Nothing was really discovered, other than the Cloud Giants lived in comfort.
Drogon opened the east door further and peeked inside. He saw four humanoids of elven features. Two with white skin and two with grey skin. They were all lounging on chaise longues without a care in the world. Oh readers, oh dear, dear readers, they were about to care. Care a great deal but that is a tale for next week. Until then sleep safe and remember to sniff every new door before you open it. You never know, it might save your life, or do absolutely nothing. Time will tell.
Report Date
19 Jun 2024
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