Schlumpy James
Schlumpy (they/them) is a character played by Ty (they/he) in The Phoenix Shroom one-shot. They are a gastrosapien, oath of the ancients paladin, with the outlander background.
Description
Schlumpy is a yellow-hued gastrosapien, resembling a large banana slug, who has made a shell out of an enormous skull a la a snull. This skull, some timelost giant humanoid's, is swept in runic carvings. Schlumpy is friendly, optimistic, and innocent. They love nature, and count among their friends ever plant and animal they happen upon. They are deeply good natured and honest, and have encountered such little adversity in their life that they would assume hostility is some sort of pleasant misunderstanding until it becomes absolutely and irrefutably obvious that this is not the case, and even then will likely insist that they will, in fact, still be your friend.Backstory
Schlumpy didn't have a shell. Which was fine! Honest, it was totally fine. Except that everyone else seemed to really love their shell, always carrying it around with them and sneaking snacks in it and writing all their secrets on the inside of it. Well, probably that's what they were doing, at least. Schlumpy didn't know because Schlumpy didn't have a shell, but Schlumpy sure did know how to dream. Schlumpy was out for his morning Howdyadoo - which is a somewhat misleading name for their favorite hobby because the morning Howdyadoo could take all day and even some of the night if there were enough plants and animals and particularly exciting rocks along the way in need of a Howdyadoo - when they came across quite a sight. A recent storm had thrown over some trees (sad) and bubbled up a whole mess'a mud that was GREAT for bellysmackin (good and fun), and as Schlumpy was lost in thought over a grumpy willow's creaky retort to their Howdyadoo they noticed a strange round shape peeking up from the muddy ground. Schlumpy isn't a great digger, and they're an even worse stick-to-a-tasker, so it took a few days of digging in the mud, and then playing in the mud, and then sleeping in the mud, and then wandering off and forgetting about the mud, to fully dig up their new prize. And what a prize it was! A skull, the biggest skull Schlumpy had ever seen, and it was the PERFECT size for becoming a shell! Schlumpy Howdyadoo'd the new friend and received no reply. This was sad but somewhat expected - Schlumpy got sleepy after playing in the mud too. After Schlumpy climbed in and practiced dragging the skull-shell around though, the new friend talked! Shelly has a silly way of speaking: all "WHO DARE DESECRATE THE SACRED BONES OF THE DREAM-DWELLING QOLOS" here and "MY SACRED REST WAS A SEAL AGAINST PROFANE DARKNESS, AND IN YOUR TRESPASSES HAS THIS BALANCE BEEN BROKEN" there, with barely any Howdyadoos, but Schlumpy didn't mind. Even more surprising, the new shell-friend made Schlumpy magic! Shelly had a lot to say about that too: "USURPATION OF THE SACRED ARTS IS THE VILEST SIN" and stuff, but Schlumpy just says good job for knowing such big words and goes back to magic tricks.Trivia
- Schlumpy cannot count but if they could would be surprised to learn they have eaten twelve cigarettes
Comments