Call Read-Out for Sending Stone #A74FCT1
Call Read-Out for Sending Stone #A74FCT1
Lightkeepers Agent: Gnyddwipgnonsnagug Groskimankobalt (“GG”)
Contracted Field Agent: Alyona Belov of The Unlikely Company
Belov: …how does fucking thing work? GG? You there? I hope rock works. We got attacked today by ogres. No big deal. Do you miss me?
GG: It worked! Happy to hear from you. Hope everyone is OK, Ogres are big deal. I am keeping myself occupied with work so I don’t…
Belov: I don’t miss you either! I will report when something exciting happens, so don’t bother me Little Man. Did I mention first mate is hot?
GG: Nono, I do miss you, I ran out of words because this stupid thing is limited to twenty-five words and it’s very hard to…
Belov: Glad you admit it. Today we are attacked by flying lava monsters. I had to rescue bird. Ship was little bit broken, but we continue.
GG: Magma Mephits? They explode, very dangerous for ships! I am going to make something better than sending stones so I don’t keep running out of…
Belov: Also, Grandfather shot man in back of head! Idiot! But do not worry, your Alyona is fucking angel of mercy and I fix him.
GG: WHAT? Who? WHHHYYYY? Do not kill the hired help!
Belov: Keep pants on Little Man…at least until I get back. I tell you I FIX him. Also, we are at Lapidary Run.
Belov: These people are so boring. What are you wearing?
GG: By “fix” you mean “healed,” right? We will reach out to Captain Morgan and smooth over things. I have to file reports on these conversations.
Belov: Oh. Reports.
Belov: Yes, I administered healing potion as per best medical practices. Today we encountered trolls but, through determination and teamwork, we were able to emerge victorious.
GG: Trolls? Take care. You are clearly the right choice for this mission. Watch for Sylvans in town; it’s a remote area. They may resupply there.
Belov: Thanks GG. We will keep eye out. And you tell boss guys from me, you are right choice for handler. Glad you have our backs.
GG: So did you find anything interesting in the troll’s lair?
Belov: Hello Hotstuff. Dead people, good food. At Devil’s Breath now. Sylvans come in every couple months for supplies. We will follow them tomorrow.
Belov: Hey sexy gnome! You ever see weapon that makes really loud bang and shoots tiny metal balls very fast? Took from Sylvans.
GG: Hey Deadly Drow. There are records of some loud weapons that spit fire, but nobody has seen one. Is that what they are looking for?
Belov: Unlikely. Took it off squad doing supply run. Will know more when we get to site. Please never send me to the jungle again.
Belov: Try not to pee. At Thanadell. Found cryptoporter gate, code THANE. Sylvans have excavated two sites, working on third. Will check out second one tomorrow. Smooches!
GG: AMAAAAAAAAAAZING!! Wait, no, this is BAD. VERY BAD. Are they looking for gates? Do they have cryptoporters? We need to develop a faster way to…”
Belov: Mage identified second site, dug straight down, broke into secured building, remnants of firearms. Inaccessible ruins – flooded, impenetrable door. Mage escaped. They know we’re here.
GG: …need faster way to recode gates. We had assumed no working cryptoporters. Does mage have notes or maps you can steal? Stay safe.
Belov: Recovered maps of site and magic locked book from commander’s desk. Can continue looking for artifacts but Sylvans PISSED. Please advise whether to proceed.
GG: Great! Hard to say, but more is helpful. Book, maybe trapped, have key? Did they find everything already? Concerned if they find what they are looking for.
Belov: Magic academy site is flooded. Can you provide underwater breathing? We can exchange books and maps via cryptoporter at prearranged time.
GG: I will get potions and wait for you. Send me 20 minute warning before you jump.
Belov: On my way. Have prezzies for you. Hope you have our breathing potions
GG: Yes. Can’t wait to see you.
GG: Hope you’re safe. Book is journal. Fucking creepy author. Started over year ago. Familiar spying, tracking Skreek. Copy in bottom shelf right of entrance stairs.
Belov: Completed exploration of Mage Academy. Many interesting things. Talked to ghost of ancient Sylvan! Too much to tell. Will pick up book soon. Thanks, Cutie!
Belov: At necromancer’s tower. Fought giant angry brain in jar. Also found key to engineering school. Will be heading back to ruins tomorrow. Hugs and kisses.
GG: Wait what? How did it fight? Who was it? Does it have legs? Is anyone acting funny - it might be controlling people!
Belov: Funny how? I am only funny one in group. It did throw handsaw through bird. That was funny. No legs. Didn’t happen to catch name.
Belov: Coming home for little rest up. Hope you’re wearing something sexy. All clear?
GG: All Clear
***Many Days Later***
Belov: Hello cutie, I have important question. Do you have way to send message to angry dwarf? Ask him how he knew we were at Lightkeepers.
GG: I will contact him and tell you tomorrow. I hope you are feeling better, and I hope you have killed more Sylvans.
GG: Scrimshaw told me contact said you'd been seen at Library, and having dinner with "a shadowless librarian gnome." Is that all people notice about me?
Belov: only until you talk and show them how brilliant you are, or you take pants off. Thanks GG, this is good information. Dream of me.
GG: Is 120 meaningful? it's a polyhedron of Pentagons, with an extra dimension. A dodecahedral complex, if you will. I could barely follow the professor's math.
Belov: It is…. Number? GG, I do not understand your message. I do not understand what that means. Why would they do this on my back?
GG: It's a shape of numbers. 5 sides is pentagon. 12 pentagons makes dodecahedron. This Hecatonicosachoron is 120 dodecahedrons projected into three dimensions from four.
Belov: chto za khuynya na samom dele? ty ne govorish' ni na odnom yazyke, kotoryy ya znayu. eto ne imeyet nikakogo smysla. GG eto ne pomoshch'.
[translation: what the actual fuck? you are not speaking any language i know. this makes no sense. GG this is not help.]
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Belov: GG. GG. Tell me about shadows. Shadows are following me. They are trying to tell me something. GG. Why do they whisper? GG, I…”
GG: Alyona? Are you ok? Shadows? What kind of shadows? Like the Horrors? What happened? What do you mean they were talking to you? Did they…
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