Journal Entry #18 Prose in Dremora: SotDK | World Anvil
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Journal Entry #18

Carmen 1003 YAR

Tensions have arisen within the Temple – amidst the Ladies of Luck, the visiting Bhediya, and among each of the 13 Guilds. Never have I been privy to all of Judas' affairs, but I feel sickened and ashamed that I had not noticed the hints, the signs... nor gleamed this from my sight. Judas intends to go beyond. And if the others do not join him... he will wage war.  
  Who is this God of Fortune? Where has the Judas I have known gone? Does he expect me to condone such actions? The desire to expand is within his domain, but considering war against all who seek to retain the Barrier? Yes, its exact purpose has been lost, but all fragments indicate it was put there for a reason.  
  Curiosity is insufficient to jusitfy the Barrier's destruction. Curiosity, I fear, though, motivates Judas no longer.  
  Has gold consumed him? Has Greed overtaken him? I will speak with Judas and put a stop to his madness before it can sink its ugly roots into the entie continent.    The Barrier has plagued Judas for centuries. Perhaps its existence has plagued other gods as well – Carmenthia comes to mind. Yet it cannot have plagued her as it has plagued him. He pleads against Greed. He pleads, instead, of being restless and of fearing the consequences of idleness. Remain idle from what?  
Annanias, I have found, does not comprehend emotions well. They are foreign and new, but I believe he attempted to express concern… before showing me horrors I cannot fully convey in words. Sprawling lands destroyed, charred, ravaged, and torn asunder. Bodies marching to a drum, unheard, but felt. There is no sense of self. Lifeless dead eyes that somehow are still filled with unfathomable malice. I did not see them, but their shadows loomed large. Monstrosities poised to destroy… waiting. They know. They're destruction is incomplete.  
Judas knows they will come for us one day. It is that prophetic “knowing” sensation that I am familiar with.   
 
Annanias has sworn an oath to destroy them. He is relentless. A force, I realize now, that I, nor Judas, may ever be able to control. The gentleness with which he takes my hand stands in such stark contrast to what I find in his eyes. I cannot stop him. I can only pray and beseech The One that the Pantheon be persuaded to follow this new path.  
It is a path laden with destruction, much of it caused by Annanias. Perhaps I can temper this path.  
 
The One, Caliban – Please. Show me the right steps. Permit me to guide as an Oracle should. Is this what must be done? Must we walk a path of immediate destruction – caused by our own hands – in order to avert a greater destruction? For years, I masqueraded with Judas, until the truth became clear. Now, I am struck by the same sensation, but this time, I fear it is not just Judas and I entangled.  
Permit me to find this truth… before it is too late.  
 
Dysis Judas

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