There is nothing more fulfilling than serving the divine. Than giving yourself fully to the god of your heart and finding yourself loved in your entirety. It is difficult to describe to anyone who hasn't experienced the horror and joy of a vigil. Where a young Paladin or Cleric offers themselves up to their god, body, heart, and soul.
Each order performs the details of the ritual slightly differently, though they all contain common themes throughout. They all include some kind of sensory deprivation and extended isolation, usually twenty-four hours, sometimes longer. Druids of Cathbad journey into the wilderness to a cave deep enough to block all light. Most other orders have windowless rooms off their chapels where adepts are cloistered with only a simple altar and single candle. It is here that they will face their gods, and themselves, for the first time.
They will go without food or water for the full twenty-four hours while they pray. This isolation serves to break down their mental defenses and in time forces them to experience everything about themselves, from their greatest dreams to their darkest nightmares and deepest shames. They are stripped bare of all their defenses and excuses and are forced to face who they really are at their core and present that to their god. It is by far the most exposing and horrifying experience any of them could or will possibly experience.
But it is followed by the most blessed. Empty and exposed, they are filled by their god's warmth and love. Feeling the acceptance and forgiveness in their bones all the way to their heart, as the god leaves with them a piece of their divine essence. Filling the cracks in their soul with parts of their own. Leaving them a whole and complete being with a constant tie to the Heavenly Planes and their divine patron.
It should be noted here that there are exceptions, though in all my research it is only in the second and most vital portion. There have been occasions, about one in every thousand adepts, in which they experience the first, the laying bare, but are not chosen by the god in the end. This is universally scarring, often resulting in severe depression, a turning away from the gods, and even suicide. This is why prospective adepts are thoroughly trained and tested before being permitted to attempt a Vigil...
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