Before you go

(2940 Words - Reading time: Around 10 mins)

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The delicious smell of beef ragoût filled the small kitchen as it bubbled away over the fire. I took a small spoonful from the brass pot and brought it to my mouth, blowing some of the heat out of it before tasting it. The beef, carrots and onions tasted delightful and i knew the broth was almost ready. Letting it bubble away, i turned my attention to the table nearby and towards another pot i'd left on it, this one filled with mashed potatoes. I took it and set it down on the hearthstone beside fire to warm it up.
I stirred the stew again, hoping that it would be done in time, as Melwyn would probably wake up soon, and i wanted to surprise him with a completed meal. Earlier, about an hour ago, i went upstairs to check up on him, to make sure that he was still asleep, and thankfully, he was. I smiled, recalling how peaceful he looked then, rolled over on his belly, snoring lightly as he gently griped the pillow beneath his head. A light blanket covered him, but it had almost fell off during the night, so i went to properly put it back on him, before i quietly exited the room and went back downstairs, hoping he wouldn't wake up. I had no doubt that if he had, he would've come tumbling down the stairs the moment he'd smell the food.
As i got back up, i noticed something moving out of the corner of my eye and turned around, glancing at the kitchen entrance to my left. I let out a small sigh of relief as i realised that it wasn't Melwyn, but our cat, Niko, inviting himself into the kitchen. He gracefuly trotted its way towards the window behind me and jumped onto the window-sill beneath it and made himself comfortable.
I grabbed pairs of plates, cups and forks from a nearby cupboard and set them on the table behind me just as the first sun rays of the morning finaly entered the kitchen, illuminating the rather dark room with some much needed light, including were Niko laid, and he began to purr loudly. I turned to a lower cabinet and opened its latched door, happy to find the bottle of Serasin right were Sorah said it would be. I took it and uncorked it, before filling up both cups. I reminded myself that i needed to thank him before he left later today for getting me this. I sealed the bottle up again and put it back in its hidden place. I then took the now heated potatoes from the hearthstone and brought them to the table to fill up our plates. I knew by now, two months after meeting him, that he was rather ravenous, especialy in the mornings, so i made sure to put more in his plate before lattering both with a generous helping of ragoût.
A floor board creaked to my left just as i finished and this time, i knew who it was. I sat the pot down on the table before i turned to Melwyn with a half smile on my face. He stood there, wearing a sleeveless shirt and short pants, looking at me with a confused look and messy bed hair. His sleepy eyes reflected the ambiant light in a way that briefly made them take on an almost golden colour, before they then regained their normal amber colour.
"Hey, good morning."
"Good morning" He replied back with a smile. His smile. Some people might describe it as abnormal, creepy or even scary. After all, Shapeshifters were quite rare in this country, and those sharp teeth he now bore didn't exactly look too innocent. However, while he was smilling at me, it was the last thing on my mind.
The way it illuminated his cute face, those beautiful, yet sharp amber eyes of his and his adorable litlle wolfish ears and fluffy tail made my heart flutter in my chest. But he wasn't just beautiful on the outside, but in his heart as well. Above all else, he was generous and caring. He helped us a lot, Desana and i, with various tasks around the shop and the house above. He could listen studiously to me ramble on for hours about potion ingredients. And just the other day, when we were at the market together, he defended me vehemently against a merchant that tried to swindle me out of items i had already payed for. He did all of those things while also going through a life-altering illness. An illness that had become the reason he was leaving the city in a couple of hours.
"What are you cooking?" He asked me, his voice still a bit rough from having just woken up. "It smells really good"
"I made us a meal" I said. "It was a surprise that i was supposed to go wake you up for now, but this works too" i added with a shrug.
"A surprise?", Melwyn repeated as he entered the kitchen. His tail wagged behind him as he walked up to the table. "What's the occasion?"
"Well, since its your last day here until a long time, i wanted to do something special for you" Melwyn gave me another one of his brilliant smiles before stepping closer to me, stoping just inches away. I felt butterflies wake up in my stomach as he gently grabbed my hands.
"Thank you" He said, looking into my eyes "I love the surprise" I let out a chuckle and looked off to the side, trying to hide the blush invading my cheeks.
"Its just a small thing..." I started, but Melwyn was already shaking his head at me.
"No no, its not!" He said, before looking around the kitchen and then back at me. "You got up in the middle of the night to prepare and cook a whole meal for me. How is that a small thing?"
"You haven't even tasted it yet," I insisted, a bit embarassed by his praises.
"I don't need too," He said confidently, which confused me for a moment.
"Akaela, if this tastes even half as good as it smells, it'll be by far the best thing i've ever eaten."
I felt the blush return with a vengence and before i could even respond to him, he drew me into a tight hug, which i happily gave back. We stayed like this for a few moment, until i remembered that the meal was still waiting for us on the table.
"...Mel, the potatoes are probably getting cold...", i finally said, which incited a groan from Melwyn.
"Yeah, you're right" He said, sighing heavily as we broke the hug. "I'm staring anyways" He added, patting his stomach, which made me realise that i was quite hungry also. We sat down next to each other and dug into our meals.

* * * * *

Just as he had predicted, the meal was indeed absolutely delicious. Naturally, he finished his plate before me, even as he spent half the time murmuring his approval and complementing my cooking in a dozen different ways. He even licked his plate clean, which made me chuckle and insist he takes a second serving, which he gladly did. His appetite showed no signs of wavering as he managed to gobble up both servings by the time i had finished mine. As i scooped up the last bit of potato and ragoût off my plate, i noticed him looking at me with his head rested in his palms and his lips curled up in a little smile. His eyes widened and he looked away as i turned to him and smiled through my bite.
"Sorry for staring" He said, but i waved it off, telling him that it was fine. Normally, i would've hated people fixing me, especially when i was eating, but i didn't mind it when it was Melwyn doing it. Not one bit.
"Thank you" Melwyn then suddently said to me.
"Well, it's my pleasure" I said with a chuckle, thinking he was thanking me for the meal again. "It just seemed like the least i could do for you before you left-"
"No, that's not what i mean..." he said, cutting me off. "Well, er... not just for that, i mean." He was blushing now as he tripped over his words a bit. He took a deep breathe before sitting back in his chair and pulling his hands to his lap. He hesitated and looked down for a moment before he spoke again.
"I meant to say thank you for... everything else, i guess," He explained. "Thank you for being so nice to me, since the start. And for caring so much about me." I was surprised by his words.
"Of course i care about you! You're always so nice to me and everybody else! Honestly its hard not too," i added with a smile. "You don't have to thank me for that" He looked up and smiled back at me, but i could see hints of sadness in his eyes as he looked away, which worried me.
"What is it?", I said, putting my hand on his shoulder. "Talk to me" He glanced up at me, hesitating again.
"Its just that..." He began. "i honestly have no idea what i would've done if you hadn't been there for me." He said, his face took on a grim tone and he fidgeted with his fingers as he continued.
"These past few weeks, ive had uh... thoughts. Really bad ones... and they've been difficult to chase away on my own, especially after Omaren and Calydan left last month" He paused for a moment before resuming, looking as if he was searching his words a bit.
"I think i was afraid of the future. Being stuck this way -He gestured vaguely with one of his hand, showing off the claws and fur adorning it- for the next 6 months, slowly losing my body and mind to my Ikshai... i-i was terrified of going through it all and it... it was kind of hard to find a reason to keep going at times." He glanced away now, visibly ashamed of himself for having felt this way "At least, until recently" he added. While i couldn't fully understand what he was going through, i could imagine the desperation he'd felt at the time and maybe still did, even after getting that letter from Makhlem a week ago. He had nothing to be ashamed of. I took his hand in mine, which made him look up a me.
"Mel, im so sorry for what happened to you. Nobody deserves this, especially not someone as good as you." I squeezed his hand a little harder, making sure he listened to me. "But i want you to know that no matter how hard things get, you should never give up, Ok? Don't give in to those bad thoughts, because if you do, you'll never know if things get better, like they did when you got Makhlem's letter." He looked at me silently for a few second moment, like he was taking in all that i've said, before he then nodded at me.
"You know, you're the reason i didn't give up, Akaela." He put his other hand on top of mine. "You were the one that chased away those bad thoughts, not me, at least not at first. You didn't let me forget that things could get better and that there was still a reason to keep going."
"Oh, Mel..." I felt tears prickling my eyes at his words.
"So, that's why i wanted to thank you," he continued, looking at me with gratitude. "You cared about me, even if i was rude at first and isolated myself from you and everybody else. And even despite the fact that i'm broken."
"You're not broken, Mel. Your abilities are" I said sternly, but Melwyn tilted his head, giving me a ghost of a smile that did a poor job of hiding the sadness and worry he still felt.
"Akaela, i appreciate your positivity, but i'm a shapeshifter who can no longer shapeshift. Its like a fundamental part of who and what i am is just gone" He sighed deeply before continuing.
"The worst part is, its getting worse. I can feel it," he said mournfully. "Thanks to Makhlem's letter, i know what to do and where to go to get myself fixed now, but..." He hesitated again. "I keep thinking, what happens if i loose myself... you know mentally and stuff, before im able too?" I looked away, realising that he had a point. Only two months had passed since he arrived here, and already, the physical changes were apparent. They progressed a little bit each day, chipping away at his humanity, and although he had quite a long way to go before he fully succumbed to his Ikshai, we both knew that the first mental changes would come around much sooner than that. I though for a moment about the right way to say what i wanted, searching for the right words to confort him.
"I think... that you're damaged Mel, but you're not broken" Melwyn arched an eyebrow.
"Huh, isn't that the same thing?" He said hesitantly, which made me chuckle.
"No silly! The difference is that something that's truly and completly broken means that it's damaged beyond repair. It cannot be fixed." I planted a finger on his chest.
"But you can, which means that you aren't broken, so stop telling yourself that, ok?. He nodded. "The reason behind the loss of your abilities and your illness is the damage that was done to you, to your spiritual link and your Ikshai. It can, and will, all be fixed eventualy" Melwyn stayed silent, listening closely as i continued.
"That's why you're going to Aleida, remember? The people over there can help you fix that damage, so that you can get back that part of yourself. And i know you're worried about the progress of your condition; I am too, but i trust Sorah. He'll be there with you during the whole trip, and he's gonna make sure you get there safe and in time, ok?" Melwyn nodded at me, as tears started to form in his eyes. I squeezed his hand tighter as i finished my speech
"I want you to stay focused, ok? Don't let those back thought distract you. I know that if you put your mind to it, you'll be able to shapeshift to your heart's content."A wide smile, a genuinely happy one this time, appeared on his face, and chassed away the naissant tears from his eyes. He then let go of my hand and leaned closer as he pulled me into a hug. I did the same, wrapping my arms around him as well. Holding him as tight as i could, knowing from previous moments that he didn't mind that at all.
"You're very special to me, Akaela. I don't want to lose you" He said, clutching me ever so slightly tighter as he spoke those last words.
"You won't, i promise", i said, and he let me pull back so i could look at him. He looked back at me with a shy smile, and i could see his cheeks blush under the dusting of fur covering them.
"I love you" He suddently said, almost whispering as he did, like it was a long held secret of his. His blush deepened with each words that left his mouth. I wasn't fairing much better as i could feel myself blushing furiously upon hearing him. He rested his head on mine and took my left hand, before he brought it up and gave it a kiss. When he let go, i placed it under his furred chin, pushing up his head so i could face him and look him into the eyes. I also had a secret to tell.
"I love you too, Melwyn," i confessed to him with a smile, which made his golden eyes widen in a happy surprised and sparkle with something entirely different than the sun's light, something that made my stomach feel like it had suddently transformed into a swarm of butterflies. To my great chagrin and even greater joy, he then closed them and leaned down, tilting his head slightly and pressed his lips against mine. Surprised at first, i very quickly leaned into the kiss and let myself melt into his arm. I don't know how much time had passed, but when we finaly broke the kiss, Melwyn was looking down at me with a little smile and dazed eyes.
"I'll miss you so much," he said, sounding a bit out of breath, before he then lowered his head down, resting it on my shoulder.
"I wish you could come with me," he said with a whine in his voice, his breath tingling the skin of my neck. I squeezed his hand that i still possessed tighter into my own, feeling sadness in his voice that i wanted to chase out.
"I wish i could too," I said, wishing for a moment that he wouldn't have to leave at all. I leaned my head to side and against his, which was still nestled on my shoulder.
"Don't worry. I'm not going anywhere. When you come back, l'll be here, waiting for you. I promise"
"You better," he said with a smile in his voice.