A Castrovel Adventure: Part 3, Chapter 56

In which Vaeol moves to reunite her house.

From the Daylog of Vaeol-Zheieveil Yaranevae be’Son

12. Ashelae, 24,542 - Flaghold
Today we went out to the Flaghold, where Erymi, Tae, and Less already waited. I shrive worry took me when first we uprode (I sat behind Kaure on Vali) and beheld Erymi, not that her sight did not begladden, but rather I feared it gladdened too much. She is not my wifemate, and these mindwhits haunting me are Oshis’s. I must have looked awkward when we reached the main deck, and my antennae thoughtlessly cringing, for though we had met seldomly while I healed, we had scarcely had speech, and starkly not about the grimmest things.
While I dithered, Erymi strode forth and took my hand. I almost wept right then.
I asked that we speak alone, and she led me to her hut. So overwrought was my mind that I was hardly keeping myself soothed. Still clutching her hand, I asked what news of Oshis and how he fared. ~Ollas oyi ahi lanyaf,~ - “So well as we can hope,” she answered wryly, eyes great and ruthful.
I then asked the grimmest quest on my mind: ~Stue eas?~ - ”Where is he?
~Elahat,~ she answered sadly.
At Elahat I had halt. It is a freehold, though maybe thief-hold is a better name. Son and Elahat have a long and strifesome bond, and I have heard ill tales. It sits on Father-Yaro’s far shore, three dayfares northward, and bestrides the traderoad coming from the Retaea Moors. Traders shun it whenever they can, for the holdfolk have a nameworth for blackmail and bilking so much wealth as they can. Under this sorry happendom, traders bring sake to Son. We threaten. Elahat misdraws, withstands, and grudgingly yields for a while, until repeat. Also, Oshis is not the first outcast who has fled yonder. Many misworthy folk may be found there.
Erymi outlaid that Oshis had first gone to his kin, who dwell in Hivaea on the near riverside. They had let him stay so long as they could. Yet bywardly the holdwife had bidden he must go onward, for they fall under Son’s law, and the ban overholds. Elahat lies unfar, which gives him some link and help with kin, though I could tell she still worries.
Then another thing lay upon my mind, which with Oshis’s worry off mind, now grew stronger. Tesine sat upon the floor, playing. A need overtook that set me shivering. Reckfully Erymi watched me, worried but withholding, as if she feared to guess what beset me.
Shame again filled me while I looked at her, but at last squeezed a whimper from my throat: ~O’ori thaem uthere?~ - “May I hold your daughter?’ I beseeched.
A bare breathtide she waited. Yet then understand showed clear at the Komori’s outcome on myself. She bade me come with her.
At Erymi’s word, little Tesine looked up from play. I knelt nearby and greeted softly, though withholdingness screamed want throughout my heart. Erymi asked the girl to greet me her housemother. Tesine looked to me, and I felt her mind’s lightest touch. Then she halted, with head cocked aside. I dared not stir under her learnwatch.
Then she spoke: ~Dei Didi se-nei?~ - ”Is Daddy inside you?”
I choked down a sob and nodded. ~Mi eas.~ - “Yes. He is.”
She reached out and touched my antenna-stalk, and then strode in until hers entwined with mine. I hugged her tight while her baby-mind enfolded mine. Then my sorrow howled forth, so that Remaue thrust head within the hut to see whether all was right. Yet there was only me hugging the child, sobbing foolishly, and Erymi overcrouching.
Erymi joined our mindshare, which for the first time let her wit the Komori’s outcome on me. Bywardly Tesine left for play again, which left us two to fully outseech. I let her feel the harm I bore, even while I dreaded her deemship, how I bear a queer mistwistness of her manmate’s love and yestermind, and by so doing had lost his freedom. Nothing can match the shame that he is outlaw from my sake.
Softly she laid hand on my sidelock. While I waited dreadingly, she played with my ear, even rubbing the golden stud within my lobe. I knelt with eyes shut, still fearing, and slowly opened them, to find her gazing at me.
~This ollodastra.~ - “You hold his best share,” she whispered.
At her word, I sobbed all anew. I kissed her hopelessly, shamefully, uncanny to help myself or withhold. She could merely weep with me in answer.
~This loae-lya lomya~ - “You hold all his love,” she akept outlay: ~Utherru mi verru. O val si ruaeldas ollodastra.~ - ”for our daughter, for me. In his love for you, he gave his best share.”
Her words wounded more than I could forbear. ~Stimi zhianis?~ - “Can you ever forgive me?”
~O’eiesi valyelis aloni-stimi, o’diahi.~ - ”If I thought you loved him any less, I could not,” she answered.
I could but lie in her arms while she soothed my brow. She wondered at my stolen love’s full outreach. I caught her mindwhit of a tall scrawny girl with dun skin and tawny hair, Oshis’s same hue, and knew at once she is Zheye, his eldest child from his youthtide’s love-mistress. My heart leapt at her thought, even as it did at Tesine, and at Erymi herself. I reminded the battlefield where first they had made love, and also some rather selfsome, shameful wits of that deed. This gave her halt. She asked if I could so feel.
~Kovame, o’imalassi,~ - “Feel it, and want it,” I growled, fearfully, sounding bolder than I felt, as my voice deepened toward Oshis’s. She laughed shakenly.
Against our words, we left such further talk for laterward and came from the hut, hand in hand, where the others were waiting. I looked about at my housemates and lovers, warriors and faithful, whomto I entrust my life. But one question I spoke:
~Dei vearifa saiama?~ - ”Do we stand together?” All stood wordless, but gazing straight at me. I knew them well enough to read their yaysaith.
I nodded thanks. ~Mi hithaef teaela-mastra, yudastra.~ - “Then we shall get back our shield-brother, our manlove,” So we shall do.


13. Ashelae - Eral Farmhold
Tonight we stay with Krastaes’s kindred. Theore his wifemate welcomed us merrily to her farmhold. She gave blessing for my health and freedom from misluck while Krastaes set duskmeal, and also wish that our house may regather. So much as I would like to rush straightaway to seek Oshis, we must have readiness ere we do so. Remaue with Lanaryel and Krastaes have come with me, and also Nae and Hanos. Istae, Draue, Tae, and Less have gone back to the City, where they see to watch on our behalf. At Erymi’s ask, Kaure stays with her to help with the Shota herd, and also to overtalk things linked to that doomful day with Oshis. Erymi knows she spoke against Oshis, and wishes to set right between them.
We have one task set forth ere we find Oshis: we shall find Ess. I cannot wit his fear and befuddleship when the ~Komori~ struck and unsettled our bond. The barn-grooms cast him out instead of his slaughter, for which I am thankful, though such ruth did nothing to alay his hurt. At my ask, Remaue and Draue had sought word of a bothersome Shota newly wild with Ess’s marks. We have some leads, which tomorrow we shall follow. If we can find him, I will mend his hurt.

14. Ashelae - Dirol Woods
We camp tonight under the lower slopes of Ta-Eizohu. On word of farmers we have spoken with, we are following a Shota’s track, who fled hither unlong ago. The farmers’ have told he has shunned the Shota-fields and farmholds, where he might have found some food and fellowship if their neighbor-herds had ataken him, as is the wise for a Shota newly wild after a broken bond. Right ere noon we overcame a lone Shota’s track, which could belong to Ess. From the spoor, we spooked it, and it has fled swiftly. We have afterhunted. With luck tomorrow we can bring it to bay, when hopefully I will cleave again with my Ess.

15. Ashelae - Dirol Woods
Our Shota-hunt began at foredawn, with short breakfast. Soon as dawn lit, we uptook the spoor, of a good-size Shota who yesterday had gone swiftly.
Remaue and Krastaes read the spoor, and soon reckoned this Shota was weary, starting swiftly and halting shortly, and was heading toward the mountain. Thus the threat lay in that it would climb the slopes, maybe whither we could not follow, or where it would try something hopeless, fall, and be hurt. We overtalked choices with little deemship of how we could come ahead and hem him in.
I chose to try something new. When I first bound Ess, I had been a newling, and but a little after my upriseship as soul-seer, with slight might. Sinceward I have learned new craft, which I bethought might help. So I sat upon a stone while the others waited, shut my eyes, and heeded. I freed mind from body and sought outward, toward the mountain. I was trusting that I would know Ess’s mind when we touched, and also that he would know mine.
Within the mountain’s arms I caught a wit’s glimmer: hurt, loneliness, fear, and underneath Ess. I called, and felt him freeze.
From my seat I stood and bade the others come. Hanos and Krastaes led me forth while Nae took lead on her steed, and Remaue brought rear on hers while nestling Lanaryel. We hiked another league over rough ground, right until the mountain’s foot, until I bade us slow.
I felt Ess’s nearness. I bade the others stay arear and akept forth alone, and reached a cliff standing forth from the rainwood. At its foot waited a shallow overhang, not quite a cleft, wherein lurked a shadow. Right after I halted, a hiss thence warned, yet also with a reckful quaver. I let my mind outreach again, found Ess, and let him feel me.
Ess’s hurt struck me all too fully, the shock of our bond’s loss, the understanding’s lack, and fear of what had befallen me. Now he mistrusted, sunderly as he outsought my thought. He witted some mindwhits were not mine, which made him doubtful. To loosen him, I sang and let him hear my throat. Then I drew forth a meatcake, held it high, and let the wind bear its smell. Ess came forth from his overhang. At his sight I almost wept. He had lost weight from hunger. Also I beheld fresh claw-wounds on his hide, from which he had fought another Shota, maybe from coming too nigh a farmhold and its pack’s neighborland. I let him near warily and take time. He sniffed the meatcake. Then his crafty tongue plucked it from my hand.
Falteringly he let my mind cleave his. Something like chideship beheld him, as if he beguilted me for our bond-breach. Happily, it had not wholly broken, but only forestalled by the Komori’s onset, which meant we needed less time to link again. I felt his glee while loneliness and sorrow faded. Kindly I led him back to the others, where we fed him and settled his wounds. Then I rode him bareback to our campstead.
A last word: Ess has become dreadfully jealous of anytime I near the other Shota. He has started no few fights and struck Remaue’s steed a wicked blow. I will be long working to soothe him.