"The Great Cheese Conflict" | Hoydvann, Darasuum

Written by Sgt.Softface15

One day, in celebration of the something-th anniversary Hoydvann's founding, the Hersker wanted a truly special event. Now it just so happened that the anniversary fell on the same day as a local cheese festival, so the events would of course be combined, as, who doesn't want more cheese involved in celebrations? The Hersker, in his wisdom, commissioned all the local cheese makers to work together on a joint project, Ashnuw's tallest ever cheese tower.
The event was very popular, and word of the record dairy structure soon reached the shores of Darasuum. The Alor, not wanting to be outdone, commissioned an even greater tower to be built, so as to prove their national superiority. Word of this challenge reached the Hersker's ears quickly. He was understandably furious that his tower had been outdone, so he commanded that all the cheese in the land be gathered, in order to make the tower undeniably taller than the Alor's. After hearing this, the Alor was forced to do likewise in order to compete. As both towers grew and grew, and cheese became rare, both sides lost track of which tower was actually taller.
The dispute remained unsettled, as no accurate way of measuring the immense structures could be found. Eventually the disagreement rose to all out conflict, and many lives were lost before a truce was called. It was decided that the only way to settle the conflict was to prove who's cheese tower was greater, but how to do so? They realized this was impossible without comparing the towers side by side. So, in the Spring of 1594, both towers were loaded onto enormous barges constructed for that purpose, and were brought to the neutral waters between each nation.
When they arrived however, both towers appeared to be of identical height. Each side claimed their's was the taller, and soon fighting broke out among those on-board. Unnoticed to both crews, the fighting caused the ships to move, and each tower to begin swaying. As they fought on, the cheese swayed more, and more, until at last, with the creaking of boards and breaking of many ropes, the towers fell into the sea simultaneously, capsizing the boats as they did. The fighting ceased, and the men of each side silently swam back to shore, refusing for a long while to speak of the events to those awaiting their return. And thus ended the Great Cheese Conflict.