I Killed a Turtle

I'm scared. I don't know what I'm becoming. We found the chalice in the nearby caves and all I can focus on is that mission even now while I search for a sense of empathy for what I did.
 
We reached the lakebed and searched for a while before tracking the chalice to a cave, while exploring the cave I spotted a small cavern with a large rock and a chest in it. I activated my aura and... well... it gave me confidence to move, maybe arrogance in hindsight, not the usual angry, cold point of vengeance I feel.
The rock was breathing but I felt deaf to the risk of it, the moment I entered a creature emerged from the rock to attack and I fought back, I endangered Kit and Talon as they entered the fray to help me while Jaquee and Ashe left us to do their mission... Kit still can't bring himself to forgive Jaquee for the way she just left.
 
...It was a baby, a dragon turtle sure, but still a baby and I killed it... not just that, I made my friends kill it with me.
 
The chest was worth it though and so was the scavenged parts of the creature and I know that deep down, I also know that I should feel far worse for what happened but truthfully I know I only felt regret for endangering Kit and Talon.
 
That's what scares me, I have never been a lover of animals and I've always done what I've had to do but I can't help but feel the whispers, the vengeance and my own blood is driving me towards dark pragmatism. All I want is the utter destruction of the Dread King, even if it leads me to become a bigger monster than he ever was. I'm just scared of how far I know I'm willing to go.
 
I feel like I've managed to calm Jaquee and Kit just a little. They're both right and they're both wrong and I can't help but feel that's my fault... Just as I feel everyone is calming Ashe is starting to get tetchy and look around the group. I feel like she wants to say something, she doesn't often get this kind of look in her eyes.