A surly, stocky, foul-mouthed gobhoblin ('alf-gob, 'alf-hob) mercenary. Likes fightin' and his big doubleheaded axe, Bertha, named fer his ol' mum - cuz she was a nasty old battleaxe too, bwa ha ha!
- Skin Tone/Pigmentation
- Mottled dark green
- 53 kg
Either the shortest, stockiest hobgoblin you've ever seen or the biggest, chunkiest goblin.
What little of his broad-shouldered, bow-legged frame isn't covered in grimy pot-like armour reveals murky, dark-green skin.
A sharp arrowhead nose sticks out above a very wide, grimacing mouth studded with tusks at the corners. Red eyes squint under a dour, perpetual scowl.
His overall demeanour is grim and unimpressed.
Apparel & Accessories
The picture is topped off by a distinctive horned helmet and a gigantic, notched, double headed axe strapped to his back that is almost bigger than he is.
Grum is a 'gobhob', a half-goblin, half-hobgoblin; he has the stocky, brutish strength of a hobgoblin but the stumpy height, greenish skin and broad mouth of a goblin. Sensitive about his race and parentage, he was abandoned or orphaned - he doesn't know which - as a whelp and raised in the dungeons of a brutal hobgoblin mine. Whilst he was there, he befriended an old Orc weaponsmith, who before he died of the maltreatments of the camp gifted Grum with his most treasured possession; a double-headed greataxe of excellent craftsmanship, which Grum fondly nicknamed "Bertha", after his mother. The old orc's unjust death pushed Grum to anger and to a desire to wreak vengeance and escape from the pit.
When Grum succeeding in killing the pit boss and escaped to the surface world he found that the cruelty of the mine had left him hardened, gruff, defensive, and exceptionally good at violence in contrast to the new world around him. Never really fitting in anywhere, he wandered; he found use for his talents in fighting pits and mercenary companies across the many lands of Faerun. Over time he began to seek out the rough camraderie of warrior companies and began to build his own private moral code; he'll fight anyone, anything, any time, but he won't fight 'them wots can't foight back'. Perhaps as a reaction to the bullying savagery of the pit he climbed out of, the act of striking down unarmed, helpless, or vulnerable creatures, especially children, fills Grum with a shaking, burning rage.
Grum still carries post-traumatic stress from his upbringing in the hobgoblin pits; slavery, whips and gladiatorial combats are triggers that, if he becomes trapped in a situation involving them, cause him to relive that trauma, going into a kind of grim dissociative state where he becomes capable of acts of unfeeling brutality - whatever becomes necessary in the name of survival or destroying the oppressors.
Morality & Philosophy
Grum is a strong proponent of 'every man for himself' survival and scoffs at lofty ideals or moral codes. He considers things like organized religion, loyalty to nation, king or order to be excuses people tell themselves to justify killing or pushing down whoever stands in the way of their philosophy. Despite this, he himself has a personal moral code - victimized horribly during his rough childhood, he despises bullies and will tear them down without hesitation. He also refuses to harm 'them wot can't fight back', especially nonthreatening animals and children.
Though ruthless in battle against real threats, Grum refuses to fight or kill those weaker than himself, especially those 'wot can't fight back'. He stalwartly refuses to harm children, and takes a 'live and let live' philosophy toward nonthreatening beasts and animals, though he won't hesitate to defend himself with lethal force if attacked.
Grum won't work for or take money from those he deems to be against his code, and won't think twice about turning on them if he thinks they deserve it.
Grum is a mercenary whose primary goal is simply survival; comfort and safety take second-string. Though he'll fight anyone he's paid to with certain exceptions and is difficult to provoke otherwise, Grum will without hesitation stand up to anyone he perceives as a bully and enjoys breaking down and scaring the pants off arrogant or superior-acting individuals.
Quotes & Catchphrases
"I'll fight anyone, anywhere, any time - but I won't fight them what can't fight back."
"Oi! Shitgoblin! That's right ya maggot-arsed scrotal scab, c'meer an' get a noice close shave..."
"Oi've seen prettier hair on an orc's arse."
"C'mere. Bertha wants a kiss."
"A Bertha beard-trimmin' comin' up!"
"Wot? Oi'm sorry, yer so ugly I thought I was lookin' in the mirrah."
"Ya talk so much shite yer arse is jealous."
"You talkin ta me or chewin a brick? Either way yer loosin' teeth!"
"Am not sayin yer ugly but oi could look at the sun longer."
"Hope yer next shite's a hedgehog"
"Yer that ugly our sniper wouldn'a take ya out."
"Ya kiss that one's mum with that mouth?"
"Think I saw yer mum's mug carved on the side of a church."
"What's them pointy ears for? Ticklin' yer ma's tits?"
"I wouldn't piss on ya if ya were on fire. Unless I pissed oil."
Savvies & Ineptitudes
Grum gives off the appearance of a crude, bawdy junkyard dog, but he is a canny judge of character and a shrewd tactician. Though far more observant than he appears, he usually keeps his observations to himself; preferring to let others underestimate him until it's too late.
In combat he is a brutal pragmatist whose primary philosophy is 'don't let 'em get back up'. He hits hard and without preamble. He is also a master at goading and distracting with vicious taunts, usually outside combat, but - if he can see an advantage - sometimes within as well.
Likes & Dislikes
He is very much an individualist who vocally doesn't give a flying rat's ass about race, culture, religion or authority to measure the value of a person; he very much treats others as they treat him, whether guarded and hostile or with kindness. He has absolutely no patience for arrogant or superior people and loves knocking them off their high horses, whether it's with a well-placed insult, or "a fond kiss from Bertha".
Grum loves a good meal and is a surprisingly adept battlefield cook. Nothing he makes is pretty, and some of his ingredients are questionable at best, but it's hearty and it'll fill your belly. Though he can hold his liquor like any good soldier, he's rarely drunk, as he's too paranoid to let himself slip into a situation where he isn't in control of his faculties.
Having grown up at the bottom of the scrap heap in a brutal hobgoblin mine, Grum has a hidden soft spot for the weak, downtrodden and oppressed, and despises bullies, slavers and tyrants with a bitter passion.
Virtues & Personality perks
While he doesn't adhere to formal societal codes of honor, chivalry or rule of law, he won't kill helpless opponents, prey on those weaker than himself, or in any way harm, steal from, or betray those who have treated him kindly.
Vices & Personality flaws
Grum is still dealing with echoes of the trauma he suffered in the mines growing up; he's lived a soldier's hard, unapologetic life since, and it's left him with one encrusted layer of cynicism and distrust after another, which he wears proudly as his armour. His deep hatred of bullies and tyrants can lead him to pick unnecessary fights.
Grum finds it very difficult to trust and is unsurprised, if unimpressed, at acts of betrayal and backstabbing. He has a deep suspicion of authority figures and follows them begrudgingly at best, always having a backup plan to cut and run - usually with a parting shot - when they inevitably throw him to the wolves.
He values his own hide far above any lofty cause, and the only thing that he will risk it for other than coin are the lives of individuals he's grown attached to against his better judgment.
Grum is unsettled by magic, spirits and gods, all things well out of his field of experience and not easily settled with an axe to the face.
Grum has a raucous laugh and a perpetual scowl. He often squints when sizing up other individuals. His insults are the stuff of legends and he'll often find something very personal to attack about his target, particularly if he thinks they need knocked down a peg.
Though hardly the filthiest goblinoid in the world, Grum considers a few respectable layers of dirt and grime acceptable for a hard-bitten merc on the road, and takes better care of his axe than he does of himself.
Much of his griminess and habits such as spitting or picking his nose in front of others is just another part of his taciturn act. Grum keeps a few bars of soap hidden away in his pack, sequestered like treasures, for the rare chances that he gets to bathe when nobody's looking.
The major events and journals in Grum's history, from the beginning to today.
The list of amazing people following the adventures of Grum.