carcinoGeneticist + gallowsCalibrator in Amalgama | World Anvil

carcinoGeneticist + gallowsCalibrator

gallowsCalibrator played by Jiro, carcinoGeneticist played by Link
gallowsCalibrator [GC] has started trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG]
GC: K4RK4T WHOS FUCK1NG D1CK H4V3 YOU S33N OR WH4T3V3R
GC: YOUR3 NOT TH4T SL1CK
CG: WE ARE *NOT* HAVING THIS CONVERSATION, TEREZI.
GC: Y3S W3 4R3
GC: 1T 1S B31NG H4D
CG: NO NO NO NO NO.
CG: IT IS MOST CERTAINLY *NOT* BEING HAD. I DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING RELATING TO HUMAN PENISES. JUST, ERASE THAT FROM YOUR MEMORY. NOW.
GC: Y3S YOU D1D
GC: YOU C4NT D3NY 1T K4RK4T
GC: 1T W1LL N3V3R B3 3R4S3D FROM MY M3MORY >;]
CG: WHAT WILL NEVER BE ERASED FROM YOUR MEMORY?
CG: I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.
CG: HAVE YOU BEEN DRINKING FAYGO AGAIN?
CG: REALLY, YOU SHOULD STAY AWAY FROM THAT STUFF. IT'S BAD NEWS.
CG: PLEASE.
GC: JUST T3LL M3
GC: 1 WONT STOP BUGG1NG YOU UNT1L YOU DO
GC: 4ND 1 PROM1S3 1 WONT T3LL 4NYON3 >;]
CG: UGH. IT'S NOT EVEN THAT GOOD A STORY.
CG: SERIOUSLY. IT'D BE A WASTE OF TIME TO TELL YOU.
CG: YOU'D BE SO DISAPPOINTED WITH HOW BORING IT IS. BELIEVE ME.
GC: TH4TS SOM3TH1NG SOM3ON3 W1TH 4N 1NT3R3ST1NG STORY WOULD S4Y
GC: D1D YOU FORG3T TH4T 1M 4N 1NV3ST1G4TOR OF SORTS
CG: NO. HOW COULD I FORGET SOMETHING SO FUCKING OBNOXIOUS?
CG: FINE. I'LL TELL YOU. BUT IF YOU TELL ANYONE, I'LL KILL YOU.
CG: WELL, I WON'T ACTUALLY KILL YOU. YOU'D PROBABLY KICK MY ASS INTO NEXT SWEEP.
CG: BUT, I'LL BE REALLY PISSED. FOREVER. EVEN MORE ETERNALLY PISSED OFF THAN USUAL.
GC: OK4Y OK4Y 1 WONT T3LL 4NYON3
CG: WELL,
CG: UGH. THIS IS STUPID.
CG: I JUST, WANTED TO SEE WHAT THEY LOOKED LIKE.
CG: SO I SPENT A FEW HOURS ONLINE, GATHERING EVIDENCE.
CG: I WAS CURIOUS, OKAY? THERE WAS NOTHING WEIRD ABOUT IT, FUCK YOU.
GC: H4H4H4H4H4 TH4T 1S W31RD WHO TH3 FUCK DO3S TH4T
CG: FUCK YOU! IT'S NOT WEIRD, IT'S NORMAL AS FUCK.
CG: HAVEN'T YOU EVER BEEN, LIKE, CURIOUS BEFORE?
CG: ABOUT WHAT THEY LOOK LIKE?
CG: *HUMANS* ARE THE WEIRD ONES! I JUST... I WANTED TO LEARN. GET OFF MY DICK.
CG: I MEAN, MY BULGE! GET OFF MY BULGE. FUCK.
GC: NO 1V3 N3V3R B33N CUR1OUS
GC: 1 C4NT 3V3N S33 WH4T TH3Y LOOK L1K3 D1PSH1T
GC: LOOK1NG 1T UP WOULDNT 3V3N H3LP MY CUR1OS1TY 1F 1 H4D 4NY B3C4US3 1M ST1LL FUCK1NG BL1ND
GC: J3GUS CHR1ST G3T D1CKS OFF OF YOUR M1ND
CG: YOU COULD, LIKE, TASTE THEM.
CG: THE IMAGES OF THEM, I MEAN. AGH.
CG: SHUT UP! THEY WOULDN'T EVEN BE *ON* MY MIND IF YOU WEREN'T SUCH A DICK ABOUT MAKING ME TELL YOU.
CG: SERIOUSLY. YOU'RE DRIVING ME NUTS.
CG: JUST FUCKING, BALLS TO THE *WALL* WITH HOW HARD YOU'RE MAKING MY LIFE RIGHT NOW.
GC: K4RK4T WHY 4R3 YOU T3LL1NG M3 TO SHUT UP WH3N YOU COULDV3 3ND3D TH1S CONV3RS4T1ON 4T 4NY T1M3
GC: YOU D1DNT 3V3N H4V3 TO T3LL M3 WHY YOUV3 S33N 4 D1CK B3FOR3
GC: YOU DUG YOURS3LF 1NTO TH1S HOL3 OF T4LK1NG 4BOUT D1CKS TO TH3 PO1NT YOU K33P 4CC1D3NT4LLY M3NT1ON1G TH3M
CG: WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU *MEAN* I "DIDN'T HAVE TO TELL YOU"?
CG: YOU FUCKING COCKED YOUR GUN AND POINTED IT *RIGHT* AT ME.
CG: IT GAVE ME THE WILLIES. AND I DON'T USE THAT WORD LIGHTLY.
CG: UGH, WHATEVER. YOU'RE JUST FUCKING WITH ME. I KNOW YOU.
GC: K4RK4T TH3R3 W3R3 L1K3 20 JOK3S R3L4T1NG TO D1CKS 1N THOS3 S3NT3NC3S 4ND 1 G3NU1N3LY C4NT T3LL IF TH3Y W3R3 ON PURPOS3 OR NOT
GC: YOU D1DNT H4V3 TO T3LL M3 4T 4LL 1 JUST WOULDV3 B34T YOUR 4SS
GC: WH1CH 1SNT TOO B4D 1N 4LL HON3STY
GC: 3XC3PT FOR TH3 F4CT TH4T 1T 1S
CG: WHAT? THERE WEREN'T ANY DICK JOKES.
CG: WAIT
CG: FUCK. OKAY, THERE WERE A COUPLE, BUT THOSE WERE PURELY COINCIDENTAL.
CG: DICK JOKES ASIDE, YOU RELENTLESSLY SHAFTED THE RESPONSIBILITY OF TELLING YOU ONTO ME. I WAS LEFT WITH NO CHOICE.
CG: SHIT. I DID IT AGAIN. UGH.
CG: LET'S CHANGE THE SUBJECT.
GC: SUR3, 1T W4S "CO1NC1D3NT4L"
GC: GOD D4MN1T K4RK4T STOP W1TH TH3 FUCK1NG D1CK JOK3S
GC: 4ND WH4T TH3 FUCK 4R3 W3 3V3N SUPPOS3D TO FUCK1NG T4LK 4BOUT, 4NYW4YS
GC: 1 TH1NK YOUR OV3RUS3 OF TH3 WORD FUCK1NG 1S RUBB1NG OFF ON M3
CG: ALRIGHT, FUCK, THEY'RE NOT INTENTIONAL! I'LL TRY TO STOP.
CG: ANYWAY.
CG: HOW HAVE YOU BEEN? I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU IN PERSON IN A WHILE.
CG: I KINDA MISS YOU.
CG: BUT, LIKE, NOT *THAT* MUCH. DON'T LET IT GET TO YOU.
GC: 1V3 B33N F1N3 1 GU3SS
GC: 3R1D4N C4M3 OV3R TO MY H1V3 TO T4LK 4BOUT VR1SK4 4ND 1 TH1NK H3 D3V3LOP3D SOM3 SORT OF F33L1NGS FOR MY TR33 H1VE
GC: 1TS R34LLY FUCK1NG W31RD YKNOW. L1K3 WHY MY TR33H1V3 OUT OF 4LL OF TH3 TR33H1V3S H3 COULDV3 CHOS3 TO H4V3 SOM3 SORT OF FLUSH CRUSH ON MY TR33H1V3 SP3C1F1C4LLY
GC: B3S1D3S TH4T D4V3 H3LPED M3 W1TH GROC3RY SHOPP1NG 4ND 1 H1V3NT R34LLY B33N UP TO 4NYTH1NG 3LS TH4N TH4T
GC: HOW H4V3 YOU B33N >:?
CG: I CAN'T BELIEVE HE'S *STILL* TRYING TO GET WITH YOUR TREE. I KNOW THE GUY PRETTY WELL, BUT I COULD NEVER WRAP MY THINKPAN AROUND THAT.
CG: I MEAN, NO SHAME TO THE GUY, BUT IT'S PRETTY FUCKING WEIRD.
CG: REGARDLESS,
CG: DAVE HELPED YOU WITH GROCERY SHOPPING? HAVE YOU TWO BEEN, LIKE, HANGING OUT MORE THAN USUAL?
CG: AND, I'M FINE.
GC: Y34H L1K3, 3R1D4N C4LM TH3 FUCK DOWN 1TS MY H1V3 YOU C4NT P41L 1T
GC: Y34H 1 GU3SS W3V3 B33N H4NG1NG OUT 4 B1T 1 K1ND4 JUST R4N 1NTO H1M 4T TH3 STOR3
GC: WOW 1 T3LL YOU MY WHOL3 L1F3 STORY 4ND YOU JUST S4Y TH4T YOUR3 F1N3
GC: >;]
CG: WELL, YOUR LIFE'S MORE INTERESTING THAN MINE. SHUT UP.
CG: EXCEPT, LIKE, DON'T SHUT UP.
CG: BLUH.
CG: YOU *REALLY* WANT TO KNOW HOW I'VE BEEN? OR ARE YOU JUST SAYING THAT TO TEASE ME NOW?
GC: Y3S 1 *R34LLY* W4NT TO KNOW HOW YOUV3 B33N
GC: ( TH3 US3 OF TH3 4ST3R1SKS W4S TO MOCK YOU )
CG: OKAY... SO IS THIS HUMAN SARCASM?
CG: I CAN'T TASTE IT LIKE YOU CAN. THROW ME A BONE HERE.
CG: EXCEPT, "BONE" AS IN AN ACTUAL BONE, NOT A HUMAN PENIS.
GC: GOD D4MN1T K4RK4T 1 WOULDNT H4V3 THOUGHT OF 1T L1K3 TH4T
GC: NO 1TS NOT HUM4N S4RC4SM
CG: ALRIGHT...
CG: WELL, I'VE BEEN KINDA SHITTY.
CG: HEIR TO A GREAT SHIT FORTUNE, HATCHED IN A SHIT STABLE IN THE VALLEY OF SHIT, YOU KNOW THE DRILL.
CG: I DON'T KNOW. MAYBE I'M LONELY? GOING ON TROLLIAN TODAY WAS A NICE CHANGE OF PACE, BUT IT STILL JUST MAKES ME SO ANGRY.
GC: W3LL NO FUCK1NG SH1T 1T M4K3S YOU 4NGRY 3V3RYTH1NG M4K3S YOU 4NGRY
GC: YOU R34LLY N33D TO G3T OUT OF TH3 SH1T STR34M DUDE
GC: M4YB3 YOU N33D 4 T34LBLOOD3D H3RO1N3 TO PULL YOU OUT OF TH3 SH1T
GC: G3T YOU 1NTO TH3 FR3SH SH1TL3SS W4T3R
CG: YEAH.
CG: YEAH, MAYBE I DO.
CG: I'VE BEEN UTTERLY ENGULFED IN SHIT FOR SO LONG THAT I'VE FORGOT WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE, Y'KNOW, *WIPED*.
CG: I'M GETTING LOST IN THIS METAPHOR AGAIN. LET'S NOT GO BACK DOWN THAT ROAD.
CG: WHAT EXACTLY ARE YOU SUGGESTING HERE, TEREZI?
GC: M4YB3 W3 C4N H4NG OUT SOM3T1M3
GC: YKNOW L1K3 FUCK1NG P4LS
GC: H3LP YOU G3T M3T4PHOR1C4LLY W1P3D
GC: 1 C4N 4NNOY YOU UNT1L YOU Y3LL 4T M3 BUT 1N SOM3 SORT OF FR13NDLY W4Y
CG: I'D LIKE THAT.
CG: I LOOK LIKE ABSOLUTE SHIT RIGHT NOW. SO, IT'S GOOD THAT YOU'RE BLIND.
CG: WELL, IT'S NOT *GOOD* THAT YOU'RE BLIND. BUT, IN THIS *ONE* SCENARIO, IT DEFINITELY SWAYS THINGS IN MY FAVOUR.
CG: GOG. LISTEN TO ME. I'VE BECOME SO SOFT. I USED TO NOT GIVE A FUCK ABOUT POKING AT YOUR DISABILITY.
CG: THAT RED-SWEATERED NOOKSTONE IS *KILLING* ME.
GC: M4YB3 TH4T 1SNT SUCH 4 B4D TH1NG
GC:
GC: WHO 4M 1 K1DD1NG, K4NKR1 L1K3 4CUTU4LLY SUCKS
GC: IV3 H34RD SOM3 OF H1S R4NTS B3FOR3 HOW DO YOU PUT UP W1TH H1M
CG: I HONESTLY DON'T KNOW.
CG: I REALLY AM JUST A BEACON OF MENTAL FORTITUDE HERE.
CG: OR MAYBE I'M JUST GROWING NUMB TO HIS BULLSHIT.
CG: TORTURE STOPS WORKING AFTER A WHILE, YOU KNOW?
CG: REALLY, THOUGH, HE'S NOT *THAT* BAD OF A PERSON. HE'S JUST... UNAWARE, I GUESS?
CG: HE'S TRYING TO BE A GOOD PERSON. HE'S PRETTY FUCKING TERRIBLE AT IT, THOUGH.
CG: ONCE HE WEARS HIMSELF OUT, HE'S ACTUALLY KINDA BEARABLE. I MEAN, HE STILL PISSES ME OFF, BUT LESS SO THAN USUAL.
GC: W3LL Y34H TH4T M4K3S S3NS3
GC: WH3N YOUR3 WORN OUT FROM S33M1NGLY NONSTOP T4LK1NG 1TD PROB4BLY M4K3 YOU B34R4BL3
GC: 1 M34N 4T L34ST YOUR3 NOT JUST M4K1NG FUN OF M3 FOR B31NG BL1ND 4NYMOR3
GC: M4YB3 TH4TS 4 ST3P 1N TH3 R1GHT D1R3CT1ON
CG: YEAH. SORRY.
CG: ABOUT, ALL THE TIMES I WAS A DICK TO YOU, I MEAN.
CG: UGH. WHAT THE FUCK AM I SAYING? I'M A DICK TO EVERYONE, ALWAYS. IT'S MY DEFINING PERSONALITY TRAIT.
CG: I'M JUST NOT REALLY MYSELF RIGHT NOW, YOU KNOW?
CG: BLAH BLAH BLAH. YOU'RE NOT MY THERAPIST, I'LL SHUT UP.
GC: YOU H4V3 4 PO1NT TH3R3
GC: YOU 4R3 4 D1CK TO 3V3RYON3
GC: 4ND 1 DO KNOW 1V3 BEEN STUCK UP SH1TS CR33K W1THOUT 4 P4DDL3 B3FOR3 TOO
GC: 4ND 1 SUPPOS3 1 DONT R34LLY M1ND T4ST1NG WH4T YOU H4V3 TO S4Y
GC: W41T 4R3 YOU 1MPLY1NG TH4T YOU H4V3 4 TH3R4P1ST
CG: YOU PROBABLY SHOULDN'T TASTE ANYTHING THAT'S BEEN EVEN REMOTELY *NEAR* SHIT'S CREEK. SEEMS LIKE A GENUINE HEALTH HAZARD.
CG: AND, I GUESS I DO. HE'S NOT REALLY MY "THERAPIST", SO MUCH AS HE'S MY "GUY THAT LISTENS TO MY BULLSHIT SOMETIMES".
CG: HE'S SORT OF ANNOYING, IN A PREACHY, SELF-IMPROVEMENT KIND OF WAY.
CG: BUT, NOT AS PREACHY AS KANKRI, THANKFULLY. MORE SOFTLY-SPOKEN. AND LESS OBLIVIOUS.
CG: IS EVERYTHING OKAY, TEREZI?
CG: SORRY, THAT'S A PRETTY LOADED QUESTION. I JUST THOUGHT I SHOULD ASK.
GC: Y34H 3V3RYTH1NGS 4LR1GHT, K4RK4T
GC: WHY WOULDNT 1T B3 >:?
CG: I
CG: DON'T KNOW.
CG: I JUST, CARE ABOUT YOU. I GUESS.
CG: I'M HERE, IF ANYTHING'S EVER BOTHERING YOU.
CG: ANYWAY. I THINK I'M GOING TO TRY GET SOME SLEEP. I'VE BEEN PRETTY TERRIBLE ABOUT THAT LATELY.
GC: S4M3, 1 H4V3NT R34LLY B33N G3TT1NG SLEEP 31TH3R
GC: GU3SS W3 BOTH SHOULD GO 4CTU4LLY C4TCH SOM3 ZS 1N 4 FUCK1NG N3T OR SOM3 SH1T
GC: 1 DUNNO, M3T4PHORS
CG: YEAH. WE SHOULD CATCH EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THOSE ZS.
CG: JAGGED LITTLE FUCKS WON'T KNOW WHAT HIT THEM.
CG: WE'LL BE THE MOST FEARED Z WRANGLERS THIS SIDE OF AMALGAMA. OR SOMETHING, I DON'T KNOW.
CG: HAVE A GOOD SLEEP, TEREZI.
GC: GOODSL33P TO YOU TOO K4RK4T >:]
gallowsCalibrator [GC] has ceased trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG]

carcinoGeneticist [CG] started trolling gallowsCalibrator [GC].
CG: HEY, TEREZI.
CG: ARE YOU BUSY?
CG: IT'S FINE IF YOU ARE, JUST LET ME KNOW.
GC: OH H3Y
GC: 1M NOT BUSY
GC: 1M JUST DO1NG WH4T 1 USU4LLY DO
GC: WH4TS UP >:?
CG: NOTHING IS UP.
CG: DO YOU SERIOUSLY THINK I'D BE MESSAGING *YOU* IF ANYTHING WAS UP? GOD.
CG: ANYWAY. I WAS JUST WONDERING IF, YOU KNOW.
CG: YOU WANTED TO MAYBE MEET UP SOON OR SOMETHING.
CG: OR NOT. I DON'T REALLY CARE.
GC: 1 M34N 1S TH3 SHY NOT UP 4NYMOR3 >;]
GC: H3H3H Y34H W3 C4N M33T UP SOON 4ND L1K3
GC: H4NG OUT OR SOM3TH1NG
GC: D4MN1T
GC: SKY* >:[
CG: WHAT WAS THAT, A FREUDIAN SLIP OR SOMETHING?
CG: I'M NOT SHY, IF THAT'S WHAT YOU'RE INSINUATING.
CG: WELL, MAYBE A LITTLE. BUT THAT IS IRRELEVANT, SO SHUT UP.
CG: ARE YOU IN YOUR HIVE?
GC: NO 1T W4S 4 M1SP3LL DUNK4SS
GC: Y34H 1M 1N MY H1V3
CG: ARE YOU ALONE?
GC: Y3S?
GC: K4RK4T 4R3 YOU PLOTT1NG NURD3R 4G41N
GC: FUCK
GC: MURD3R*
CG: NO, WHAT? WHAT DO YOU MEAN "AGAIN"?
CG: HAVE YOU BEEN DRINKING FAYGO? YOUR SPELLING'S ALL FUCKED UP. SOMETHING FEELS OFF.
CG: TEREZI, PLEASE DON'T TELL ME YOU'RE GETTING HOPPED UP ON THAT TOXIC CLOWN JUICE AGAIN, GOD DAMN IT.
GC: 1M JUST D1STR4CT3D
GC: 1 H4V3NT B33N DR1NK1NG F4YGO 4G41N
CG: DISTRACTED?
CG: WITH WHAT?
GC: 1 DUNNO 1V3 JUST B33N R34LLY D1STR4CT3D FOR NO R34SON L4T3LY
CG: OH.
CG: SORRY.
CG: ARE YOU SURE YOU'RE OKAY?
GC: Y3S 1M SUR3 K4RK4T
GC: SO YOU W4NT3D TO H4NG OUT OR SOM3TH1NG >:?
CG: ALRIGHT, THEN.
CG: YEAH, I WANTED TO HANG OUT.
CG: CAN I COME OVER, LIKE, NOW?
CG: AFTER I GET DRESSED, I MEAN. AND SHOWERED.
CG: EXCEPT, NOT IN THAT ORDER. BECAUSE THAT'D MAKE NO FUCKING SENSE WHATSOEVER.
GC: Y34H YOU C4N COM3 OV3R 4FT3R YOU G3T DR3SS3D 4ND SHOW3R
GC: ( BUT NOT 1N TH4T P4RT1CUL4R ORD3R >;] )
CG: OKAY.
CG: COOL.
CG: WELL, I'LL, LIKE, SEE YOU LATER, AND STUFF.
CG: YEAH.
GC: W31RD WORD1NG BUT OK4Y
GC: T4K3 1T SL34ZY >;]
CG: YEAH, SURE.
CG: TAKE IT SLEAZY, TEREZI.
CG: WHATEVER THAT MEANS.
carcinoGeneticist [CG] ceased trolling gallowsCalibrator [GC].

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