Old Friends

Day 17 Horsebow Moon, 1173
 
I found Emelina. It wasn't intentional, but it wasn't something that could be avoided. She cried and I could feel my heart break.
I'd wanted to tell her when I left that I was safe, that I was going out to live my life for myself, but I was afraid. If I told her, I was worried that I'd lose my confidence.
I realize now that I was selfish. She was my only true friend and I lied to her. I'd never considered how my disappearance would affect her. I was so used to my family using me for their own personal gain, that I hadn't thought that Emelina might have just liked me for me.
She has no reason to forgive me, I know I've betrayed her trust, but I continue to be selfish and hope that she will be my friend again. I've been alone for so long, only Felon and Solaris to keep me company. Seeing Emelina again... I've missed her so much.