Adventure Log, #73: THE ONE WHERE WE WRECKED A BEHOLDER AND SHIT WAS REWARDED.

General Summary

Adventure Log, #73
Let's pick up where I left off... If you remember, Rhythgor and Eek are stuck to a huge penis magnet in the middle of the room and the beholder is still fucking invisible. Good times.
We start out with Steef trying to smash the beholder. Rhythgor tries to escape the magnet. He was able to wiggle around a bit, but couldn't quite get free. He is turned to stone. How does this keep happening to our group? So, he was stoned and fell to the ground, knocking me prone. How Dare! Eek was able to cast Fireball from his place on the penis magnet. Then something awesome happened. Zug monked up the beholder! He was stunned in mid air. Fuck yeah! *cheers
Enna healed Mr. Steef and then these weird numbers and lines appeared all around the floor ;) Eek made the beholder glow so we could see his sorry ass, then him and Steef ninja'd out of 2 laser beams. It was pretty awesome. Then, friends, I fucking killed the motherfucker! YUANTEAM! I shot him with a fire arrow and he exploded. Yes! We celebrated, but then remembered one friend was stoned and another was stuck to a penis in the air.

Then we find a SHIT ton of treasure. Hell to the yeah! *cheers
We still had the massive fabric cover that was covering the penis magnet when we entered the room, so Steef took it and flew up to try and cover it back up. He had to pull off some fly (ha!) moves to get it around Eek, and it worked! Eek was penis magnet free. Enna, turning to Rhythgor, remembers this is exactly what happened to Steef a while back, so she blessed and guided herself before casting Greater Restoration via the scroll we just found to unstone Rhythgor. It worked! *cheers to Enna!
Time to get the fuck out of there! While walking back through the hallways, celebrating how awesome we were, we came across a skeleton mopping. Yep. It was a skeleton and he was mopping the floor. Turns out he was a part of a skeleton cleaning crew. This is where things start turning to shit...fucking literally. It got crazy. Rhythgor insults the mopping skeleton and then it was time to fight. Sagres brought out 3 animals from his bags of tricks! High Enya, Charles Bearington, and of course, Chuck Beary. Then, he fucking summoned 4 demons, because of course he did. Yuanteam? One of the skeletons spewed cleaning acid at us and then Kujo turned his ass around and started projectile shitting. Shitting. Like he was on tour at the Capitol. It was glorious. And so so gross. Like really gross. So, Steef got some inspiration (whatever that is!) for the shit moves. It got messy, but we ended up smooshing the skeletons and moved on.
We headed down the hallway on the left, passing a plaque that said: "Walk through water with weapon in hand. Slake your shadow at the font. The vulture is the first step. Right the gods. The walls of history tell all." wut? We entered a space with a sarcophagus, some masks and pictures. Turns out, Zug knows some religion and figured out the sarcophagus belongs to Khubazhan, who is apparenty a non-trickster froghemoth god of Omu. Weird. The pictures were weird too. 1- the froghemoth with an old lady tossing seeds around. 2- Tentacles wrapping around a crocodile with a man holding a bug to his mouth. 3- Four happy hunters riding with a young woman with a knife and a headless chicken 4.- Walloring in a shallow pool with people offering treasures and someone holding a lit candle.

*This is why I drink.*

The 4 masks on the wall match the wall paintings. Why can't the old gods just tell us what we are supposed to do instead of puzzles. Ain't nobody got time for that! *cheers
Zug walks up and puts on one of the masks. I am not sure which one. My view was askewed. Eek was acting pretty sus. He insisted on stealing 10g and then wouldn't let go of it. He's usually pretty nice about stuff like that. It was super weird. He walked up to a mask. Rhythgor really wanted to open the sarcophagus. He aksed Steef for help. Mr. Steef had a bad feeling the whole time we were in this weirdo space. He helped, but didn't want to. We probably should have listened to Steef's bad feeling. What happened next? Well, we took a short rest and healed a bit, but after that? Read the next adventure log to find out!
XOXO, Kaely

Rewards Granted

• 12,000 cp, 5,000 sp, 2,900 gp, 35pp
• A clay chameleon statuette covered in crystal beads that change colors (25 gp)
• Three painted gold masks sized for children and shaped like the faces of a bat, a monkey, and a parrot, respectively (75 gp each)
• A gold tiara shaped like an octopus with mother-of-pearl eyes (2,500 gp)
• A diamond worth (500gp)
• A potion of diminution
• A potion of supreme healing
• A bead of force
• A bronze +1 shield shaped like a screaming devil's face,
• a scroll of gentle repose
• A scroll of greater restoration- used to unstone our friend

Character(s) interacted with

• Belzchorzh the Beholder
• The Skeleton Crew- Stor Bjor, Pipar, Samloka (eating a sandwich), Mjolk, Pylsar, Kampavin, Sultor

Notes

• Steef- inspiration

Report Date

07 Apr 2022