Toshi's Quest, Pt. II

Shingen suggests allying with Nobukawga to save the nomads from the oncoming tsunami and Peanut Anon. After Nobukawga delivers his 'We are Number One' speech they start packing quickly, only for Kenshin to come down from the mountains to try and use the opportunity to kill Nobukawga.
Shingen suggests that Kenshin should find a sword upon on the mountains which has a spirit of a woman inside, and Kenshin takes up the challenge to give Isehime a friend. Peanut Anon gets angry at the intrusion of her territory but Kenshin attacks her. Peanut Anon transforms into her bishoujo goddess form, dressed in a dress made from peanut shells wearing a peanut mask. Toshi asks Peanut Anon how to get up to the mountain but Peanut Anon says she doesn't know. Vero uses her chance to sing her siren song which nabs them a nomadic hawk entourage which sends them up to the mountains, after Shingen is trapped inside a balloon so he can be taken up without being blown away.


They make their way up and find the golden gates to the Garden of Bread where they bump into Sindy and Toemeyo trying to gain access but is stopped by the Archangel Prince. They start arguing which prompts the seraph and Prince's manager Silbe to descend who starts blowing them all off the mountain.
However they keep coming back, and Toshi tells Silbe he's looking for Balls, not Bread. Silbe, admiring his persistence, invites them all to partake in his three challenges to get a Ball, which he has one of, and they all participate to try and win it.
The first one involves stepping on colored squares, in which wrong ones will send the person into an out-of-body experience revolving around their own fears. Shingen, Yuki and Toemeyo who make their moves all fail near the starting line, which disappoints Silbe, stopping the challenge to berate them.

Plot points/Scenes

(we left off when a lake exploded at Mt. Kerorun and Peanut Anon was coming for their ass)

Toshi, who was still trying to hitch a ride on Nobukawga, realized that he was not going to get the bird to budge with the coming tsunami wave. The nomadic group started panic, after all it was coming right at them and they had children and animals grazing peacefully. So Shingen sighs and rubs his gassy pheromone forehead, and says, "i can't believe i'm suggesting this to Oda Nobunaga myself but for now how about you let us help you out".
And Nobukawga who has been aware that this gas man has been giving him the stink eye ever since the group arrived, strokes his majestic sharp beak with his giant wing and says "YOKAROU", exits the tent and screams in his majestic eagle voice for his people to relax. The people, who had been scrambling to take down their tents and find their horses, looked up at Oda Nobukawga. Oda Nobukawga looked at them his fearsome eagle eyes and said, "no one here is allowed to die you lil shits we aren't scared of any water nor any mountain cryptid", "remember we are number one". And the people of the Oda nomad clan started weeping, "we are number one my lord", "this is going down in history".


And they began to move as one, reenergized and ready. However, moving even faster than Peanut Anon and the tsunami wave was one individual, his sword raised above his head. "ODA NOBUKAWGA I HAVE COME TO KILL YOU", "BITCH YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO DIE TO SOME MOUNTAIN BASTARD", said a certain pale haired man. For it was the perfect chance to strike and claim the giant eagle's head while they were busy trying to get away from Peanut Anon.
Kenshin Uesugi, like a mad bull, ran so fast his legs were basically invisible, right towards Toshi and his confused party. It had looked as if Kenshin was aiming right for Toshi, but his sword veered instead to the black feathered hawk who did a fearsome "what the KAW IS FAWKING HAPPENING". "I WILL TAKE THE HEADS OF YOUR SOLDIERS AND FULFILL MY QUEST OF A THOUSAND DEAD IN THE NAME OF MY BELOVED SWORD SPIRIT ISEHIME," Kenshin said kind of loudly - he really didn't need to. There was no sound buffers around them - he was just being a dramatic bitch.


"Hm," Toshi contemplated and rubbed his chin wisely. "dying would pose a problem.". Nobukawga was as majestic as he was stupid, so he instead said "bring it on you fucker" as if his soft feathers held a blade - it did not.
"Girls, girls," Shingen intervened and looked to Kenshin. "You want to be with Isehime, correct?" it was not an intelligent deduction. Kenshin was very loud in his ambitions. For example, he swung his sword at Shingen now, only for it to pass through. For once Shingen was happy that he was just a gas man. "doesn't work. I'm gas." Shingen said. "I've heard of a very old tale, a tale that said there was a woman that had killed every guy that had catcalled her with a sword. after her death, her spirit now resides inside the sword."
Kenshin perked up at this challenge and looked at his sword in happiness. "Isehime baby! we're going to get you a friend!!". But it was at this point Peanut Anon has had enough, and she bellowed out "GET OFF MY LAWN" Of course, anyone who wasn't Kenshin knew to obey this.
"GrrraaaaAAAAAaaaaAaaaa" Was Kenshin's war cry as he lunged his entire body weight into cutting Peanut Anon. "Attaboy," Shingen cooed - Kenshin was productive when put to good use. "WHY ARE YOU AIMING FOR ME YOU IDIOT" Peanut Anon had a very valid question, but no valid answers.
In the midst of this chaos, Shingen, Toshi and Nobukawga ushered the nomads out of the way from the heat of battle.


Finally, Peanut Anon had enough of this bullshit, and transformed to her bishoujo goddess form - a beautiful being of a person wearing a dress made from peanut shells. She was too beautiful to look at, so her face donned a peanut mask as to protect the eyes of the beholder.
"Finally," Toshi said, "do you know how we can up to Kerorun mountain? if there is a trail or perhaps a map?". But Peanut Anon merely sighed, and it sent a gust of wind that made Toshi stumble on his feet, "No. I don't know. I don't really care. I just changed into this form because y'all were being annoying.". "That's fair," Toshi said, because he didn't want to impose.
But Vero, next to him, sang her siren song and charmed the nomadic hawks to her beck and call. She hopped onto on of them and looked at Toshi, "Get in loser we're going shopping (for balls)". Toshi, of course, took no hesitation riding up onto the majestic bird. However, Shingen, who was attached to Toshi, blinked at the duo, "... I can't ride on that.". And standing beside his lord, Yuki also took a step back. "Neither can I..."


But Toshi was smart, so he was prepared. He took out a balloon from his pocket and trapped Shingen in it. Then, he took out his marker and drew Shingen's face, "Perfect," he said - life imitates art.
So he and Yuki rode upon the majestic hawks and rode up to Mt. Kerorun. There were vague, disembodied voices of, "aaaaaAaaaAAAAAaaaAaaa", and, "WEEEEEEEEEEEEE" and "THIS IS NOT WHAT SOLDIERS SHOULD BE DOING" - and also the occasional laugh.
So they rode up, up, up into the mountains until they chanced upon the gates, where two other person were already there, with white hair and a frog mask. "Open... the gate... stop... having it be closed...", they said. Somehow they had found their way up the mountain ranges, where the ancient path that lead to the Garden stood. But Archangel Prince, the Guardian of the Garden, did not budge.


Prince stood before the gate, the fresh scent of Bread wafting in from behind them. They stared out the gate with narrowed eyes, "who are you?". "I'm you, but weaker". "What? no. go away". "Why not?". "This area is not open for the public eyes," Prince drawled, "In fact i'm not even sure how you even found this place".
This was not what Toshi had planned, but he remained calm and tried to bargain. "What if I only had one eye?". "You're still the public". "Damn it," Toshi cursed and went to the back of the line for others to try their luck. It was Vero's turn, "Because I said so." It was somehow intimidating to hear in her cute, siren voice. But Prince did not relent, "No." he said.
Next was Yuki's turn. He simply gave Prince puppy eyes. Prince felt their resolve waver, but said "No." And so Yuki tucked his tail between his legs and trodded away, "It worked last time...".


And then suddenly, a thunderous voice rang out from behind the gates. "What the fuck is going on here?" the voice asked. And then suddenly, the clouds above them parted, the sound of Haddaway's hit 90s classic "What is love" played as an angelic being descended. He was pale, abnormally skinny, and he wore the expression of the most asshole-y manager you could possibly imagine.
"What is all this racket?" the angel asked. But Sindy merely reached over and grabbed a fistful of Prince's pure white robes and shook prince with so much force feathers fell out of the poor Bread guardian's wings. Prince merely sighed and said "Mr. Silbe I don't think I get paid enough for this job.". But Silbe just smiled at Prince as if being tossed around by Sindy had been part of the job description.
But just as he was about to exert effort in separating the demigod from his employee, he spotted Toshi and his party standing behind them. Specifically, his eyes had fell upon Shingen and Yuki. "Oh." he simply said. Shingen's balloon rotated to meet Silbe's gaze, and from inside, he spoke with a muffled voice. "What?" "Nothing," Silbe replied. then paused. "Your mortal beauty is not being expressed properly inside that rubbery thing - you should get rid of it."


And so the seraph snapped his fingers and the balloon popped, freeing the gassy man. He flicks his finger at Sindy, and her arm is mysteriously pushed back out of the golden bars to the gate. "This is a place for buddhas, gods and the enlightened. you are not enlightened, honey." But Sindy glares back at him with equal ferocity. "Let me in and get a loaf of that stupid Bread."
Silbe rolled his eyes, "Nobody here is allowed to eat Bread off the Tree. Last time we had something like that happen we ruined this beautiful world." He stuck his nose outside the bars. "We kicked your father from here years ago I will kick you too.". And looking at Toshi and assuming the same, he spun around and merely said "may the fresh scent of freshly baked Bread bless you always". And all of them were sent flying from the gates like ragdolls.
And so Silbe and Prince thought that would be the end of it, but it was not, because he did not foresee their persistence. Time and time again all of them would claw their way up back to gates no matter how far Silbe blasted them away. Whether they landed in a lake or in the trees or in some bear's den, they climbed back up. But Silbe would merely play "Thank u, next" on his iPod looking device, flick his wrist again and they would experience flight once more.
Prince watched on with surprise, "why are they so persistent?". "They're humans, Prince, they're like that.". Toshi, for the 12th time, crawled his way to the top once more and collapsed at the gate. "12. You set a new world record, I've never had to stand here for so long before," Silbe said. Toshi chuckled as if amused by this, "I'm not leaving until you tell me where the Ball is."


Silence.
"Oh! A Ball! I thought you were here for Bread." "Why... why would I care about bread?". "Why indeed. So you wanted a Magical Ball? Well, I happen to have one of them. You mortals like them, right? But I also know you lot like adventures and challenges so," he clapped his hands. "I will give you the Ball if you can play three of my little challenges and win them. Your friends can join too!"
And Sindy and Toemeyo who overheard this - even though they were indeed there for the Bread - clambered up to the gates to partake in this mysterious challenge set upon them by a smug-looking bastard. Silbe clapped his hands in glee. "more people participating! I love it!" Then he poofed a sandbox arena for them to play in. "This challenge is easy," he said. "just don't die."
The ground crackled underneath them and they all jumped in fear, tiptoeing around each other. Eventually there were two teams split into opposite sides of the arena – Toshi was with Yuki and Sindy, and on the other side, Toemeyo was with Shingen and Vero. In the center bloomed colours on the ground in the patterns of checkers. "Figure out which ones you can step on and which ones you can't! it's just like hopscotch!"


The teams weren't exactly sure what would happened if they stepped on the 'wrong ones', but Shingen had no fear. He floated one space in front of him, and assumed that would count as a step. Nothing happened. So cautiously he tried one more and unfortunately, that was one that wasn't supposed to be stepped on.
Darkness fell upon him and surrounding him, hundreds of beautiful women. How was this bad? Shingen felt like he had really died and gone to heaven. He was before the golden gates so he might as well be in heaven. He reached out to touch a lady's cheek, but she turned away. "Shingen-sama... actually... i don't think... you're handsome after all". "Shingen-sama as a gas man you're really lame". How could such vile words come from such beautiful lips? Shingen's gassy heart felt like it had been struck with thunder.
He fell to the floor, knees and elbows on the ground as the women began to gather closer, whispering about how it was super unattractive to be a man entirely formed from pheromones. "What even are pheromones" said one shadow. "Isn't that what ants use to communicate" came a reply. "Shingen-sama is an ant???"
From the outside it looked as if Shingen had simply fainted where he floated, and to the others who had not yet moved it seemed terrifying. On the other hand, Silbe looked like he was having plenty of fun. He was munching on what appeared to be popcorn, while Prince watched on in concealed horror.


Yuki, on the other team, shook his snow dog head, upset that he was not on the same team as his lord. His plan was to simply charge forward and clear to the other side. He was a dog - if he ran on all fours he would surely make it in time. But Silbe anticipated the fact that he was stupid. So as soon as Yuki placed a front paw on the first square, it beeped up at Yuki, revealing that it was a wrong square, and the world around Yuki simply melted away.
He stood on a raised piece of land, surrounded by lava. Yuki thought this wasn't too bad because he could just sit there, but he forgot he was a dog now - and a dog made from snow - and he began to panic as he began to melt. "Wait wait wait i can't melt yet. I have things to do-". But too late - he was nothing but a puddle of water that bubbled as it tried to scream. To those watching outside, it looked as if Yuki had merely moved an inch forward before lurching forward and collapsing, completely losing his form, and turned into a pile of snow, not knowing the hell he had tried to endure.


Toe sighed and rolled her eyes under her frog mask, "Completely useless, this is what happens when you don't invest your time into the power of the toes". Since Pheromone Shingen didn't exactly have solid toes, and Yuki just had... paws. So Toe made a sign of worship to the Toe, and began leaping square to square. She managed to a little past Yuki, only to slip on a bit of the snow that had come from Yuki's collapsed body, and land right on a wrong square.
Paintings of realistic toes swirled around her like a cyclone. They wriggled and whispered words to Toemeyo, who fell to her knees and raised her hands up in prayer. "OH THE MIGHTY TOE" she screamed. "YOU ARE SO BEAUTIFUL". And toes took many shapes - they would turn into snakes, they danced around her like she was on a drug trip, they formed the Eiffel Tower.
And eventually Toe collapsed into fervent praying, nothing coming out but a garbled mantra of words.


Just as the next person was about to move, Silbe sighed and snapped their fingers, the markings disappearing at an instant. He looked a little disappointed, "are you sure you want this Ball? because if we're going at this pace it's going to take forever. I have things to do and places to be." Though they knew what Silbe was capable of now, they all nodded.
One must dedicate their whole life to the Ball if they wish to obtain it.

Relations

Protagonists

Master Toshi
Pheromone Genie Shingen
Yukimura the wolf
Siren Vero

Allies

Nobukawga

Neutrals/Bystanders

Archangel Prince
Bread
Silbe

Competitors

Peanut Anon
Kenshin
Spirit Sword Isehime
Sindy
Toemeyo

Plot type

Character arc

Parent Plot

Toshi's Arc

Related Characters

• Archangel Prince
• Master Toshi
• Nobukawga
• Peanut Anon
• Pheromone Shingen
• Seraph Silbe
• Sindy
• Siren Vero
• Sword Spirit Isehime
• Swordmaster Kenshin
• Toemeyo
• Yuki