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Patelnia Lie

Ah, I see you've stumbled upon mine own description. Who can blame you, wanting to learn more about the best musician, artist, thief, poet, bard, and lover in all of Aurore, if not the known multiverse. My stage name, as you should well know, is Patelnia Lie, and while I am sure you would love to find the truth buried beneath the pseudonym, I am afraid that's for my eyes and ears only. But enough about names and secrets, lets move on to some facts about me.   I fuck. Severely. All throughout the land you'll hear satisfied sighs or longing cries detailing my many, and I mean many, exploits, across the continent. From duchesses dissatisfied with their dukes to Samantha who simply needed a bit of spice in her life out on the farm, I never turn down a pretty face. And trust me, no one ever turns down mine either. Why, I flip women so easily you could call me a skillet! (You should not; however, and, jokes aside, I am Pansexual.) Despite what a few angry husbands and wives might tell you, I do try my best to leave each home wetter - I mean better - than I left it. Sometimes all a person needs is a quick diversion to remind them of their love to their partner. And other times, it helps them realize they should just get the fuck out of there. And other times, well, I'm not wanted in about half of Aspax, a third of Asmyae, and all of Oerla for nothing!   Lucky for me, the wanted posters mostly serve as advertisements for my next show. After all, who doesn't want to see the woman who bed the duchess perform live on stage! It gets more entertaining if I have to continue to play my lute as a evade the town guard.   Well, that's all about me. I could go on, and on, and on, about many of my other accomplishments, but a lady doesn't kiss and tell, and being a braggart is simply unbecoming. Plus, wouldn't it be more fun to discover my greatness yourself? Perhaps... in person?
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