The 8 Trials
Near the base of the mountain, The Chartreuse Prince placed a wall of flawless stone that stretched to the heavens. The Chartreuse Prince took the form of an old man and waited for Wesley to arrive. "I have blocked your path, noble hero" said the prince. "If you wish to ascend, you must complete this trial." Wesley touched the perfect, smooth stone wall. It was truly flawless. Wesley had no idea how he would pass this trial as this wall seemed insurmountable. It was then when he found a grasshopper hopping toward the wall.
"How could you surpass a wall such as this, dear grasshopper? You are so small and this wall is but reaching the heavens themselves!" Wesley asked the insect. As he finished the statement, the grasshopper jumped toward the wall. It soared above his head and into the heavens. He too did leap, following along with the grasshopper. As mightily as they jumped, they did not clear the wall. The small grasshopper crashed into the wall and died. "How could I out jump a mighty grasshopper such as yourself?" he lamented. He then performed last rights for the grasshopper, who valiantly attempted to bypass the wall. Since Wesley could not out-jump the grasshopper, he punched through the wall instead. After tunneling through, he moved onward up the mountain.
The next day, Wesley came across The Chartreuse Prince again, this time with a wall of smooth obsidian that stretched to the heavens. The Chartreuse Prince told him "You have surpassed the first trial. Now succeed here in order to proceed and ascend into godhood." The Chartreuse Prince was surprised that Wesley was able to pass his first trial. However knew this would be like all other attempts that mortals make to ascend... he would make sure of that if he had to.
Perplexed at how he would surpass this trial, Wesley began to think. He sat for eight minutes thinking when he observed a great spider climbing the wall. "I see, great spider. With your skills you can scale this wall and make it to the other side of heaven!" he declared. After climbing with the spider for a great many hours, the spider slipped, and fell off the perfectly smooth obsidian. It tumbled down to its doom. Full of doubt Wesley exclaimed "Oh great spider! Even your great skill at climbing was not enough to scale this wall! How could I do so if you could not?" Since Wesley could not climb as well as the great spider, he descended the wall and then punched his way through the obsidian and continued up the mountain to the heavens.
The next day the Chartreuse Prince laid a wall of shined bronze that stretched to the heavens on the path of the mountain. He instructed Wesley that his next trial would be to surpass the wall. Wesley observed a strong woodpecker fly toward the bronze wall. "How would you surpass this obstacle, powerful woodpecker?" Wesley asked the woodpecker. The woodpecker began trying to pierce the wall with its sharpened beak. Wesley too tried to pierce the wall. After a day, the woodpecker rattled by attempting to pierce the wall, fell down and died. After embalming the woodpecker, Wesley thought again. Since Wesley could not pierce the wall as well as a woodpecker could, he punched through the wall and proceeded up the mountain.
The next day Wesley found a wall of rugged iron that stretched to the heavens. At the same time, a majestic eagle perched nearby, also looking to ascend up the mountain into heaven. "Majestic Eagle - now that we have come so far up the mountain, how will we surpass this trial?" The eagle, having rested, then soared into the sky. After flying through the clouds for eight days, the eagle grew tired and fell back to the earth. Wesley tried to catch up to the eagle and protect it, but it was too late. The eagle had died from exhaustion. Wesley lamented "majestic eagle, I could never fly as long and as far as you did, so how will I ever surpass this trial?"
After burning incense for the majestic eagle, he punched through the rugged iron wall, and continued his ascension up into heaven.
At this point The Chartreuse Prince was beginning to enjoy watching this spectacle. He knew eventually he would easily be able to stop Wesley and have him descend back to earth. But this had gone long enough - it was time to put a stop to this. The Chartreuse Prince summoned up a powerful oxen.
"Powerful Oxen! You must prevent Wesley from progressing further up the mountain to the heavens. Challenge him and all that you want is yours!" The Oxen agreed to this, and set out to follow Wesley up the mountain. The next day, Wesley awoke to find a wall of hardened steel that stretched far up into the heavens. As he began to ponder about how he would bypass this wall, he heard a bellow from behind him.
"Hark, brave warrior! I am the Powerful Oxen. You will wrestle me for the right to continue up this mountain. In exchange, if you defeat me I will tell you how I would pull this wall down to the ground!" Wesley agreed, and they began to match their strength. For eight weeks they struggled and strained against each other - neither relenting. "You have great strength!" cried the powerful oxen. "However this whole time I have been only using about half of my power! It is time we end this game and allow me to claim what is rightfully mine!" The powerful oxen pushed with a renewed vigor, however Wesley did not give any ground. "How is this possible?!" The oxen cried in disbelief.
"Well, powerful oxen, while your strength is great, mine own is greater. I fear that if I did anything more than match yours you would meet a grave end." Wesley calmly explained to the ox. They agreed that Wesley was the victor in this match, and the oxen explained how she would use her great strength to pull down the wall and easily walk over it. "I don't believe my human body is made to make a pull of such a magnitude, great and powerful ox..." he explained in return. The oxen, finding a way she could prove her strength, decided to pull down the wall for Wesley. She huffed, and struggled, and after another eight weeks, she ended up pulling herself into exhaustion as she died. With great grief, Wesley constructed a mausoleum for his new fallen friend. Wesley knew he could not pull with the force of the powerful oxen, so then he punched his way through the hardened steel wall. With that, he continued his ascent into the heavens.
Shortly after passing through the steel wall, Wesley encountered a giant bear. They talked as they walked up the mountain for eight months. The giant bear explained to Wesley that to prove his worth to The Chartreuse Prince, he was to construct for him the most elaborate and elegant armor that would make him impervious to even the other deities. One day, they encountered a massive wall of pure mythril that stretched far into the heavens. The giant bear wept, as this is what he had been searching for. Together, they tore at the mythril so that the giant could add it to his supplies for the forge. For eight months again, they ripped and shredded at the wall to no avail. No matter what they did they could not loose a single chunk of mythril. In rage, the giant bear grabbed the wall, "I will crush you, you deceiving treasure!" he shouted. The mountain shook with the force at which he pressed against the sides of the wall. He pushed the sides of the wall together for eight months with no sign of weakening. Wesley grew concerned. Eventually, the giant bear died of exhaustion. "Do not let this wall also defeat your dreams, my brother" his death rattle trailed off to Wesley.
Wesley began to mourn the loss of his dear friend. for eight weeks he prepared the funeral pyre and said his goodbyes to the giant bear. Wesley swore that he would defeat The Chartreuse Prince's challenges for both him and his giant friend. he turned his gaze toward the wall of mythril. "How would I ever surpass such an obstacle... for I do not have the determination of the bear. I could never crush this wall..." So instead he punched through the mythril wall and set off to continue through the mountain to finish his trials.
This angered The Chartreuse Prince. Who dared defy him? This mere mortal dared to compare himself to the gods. He decided that he would raise an army against him in order to put him in his place. He summoned the troll king and promised him that he would be granted the largest diamond that was ever created - one that stretched into the heavens. All he had to do was present him with the head of Wesley. This pleased The Troll King, and he raised his army of 800,000 trolls to stop the advancing hero.
Wesley climbed and toiled against the frigid mountain. This journey has taken him the better part of his last few years. Soon he would be eighty years old. While his training had kept him young and powerful, he knew he was an old man now. He wanted so desperately to rest, but he knew that he needed to push through and persevere. Just as he was about to make camp for the night, he saw it. In the distance was his next trial. This time, a wall of rare, shining diamond that stretched far into the heavens was blocking his path. Even Wesley was not sure his might would be enough to surpass this obstacle.
The next day, Wesley awoke to being surrounded by an entire army of bloodthirsty trolls. Their greed had lead them straight toward his camp. Once they beheaded him, they would be rich beyond their wildest dreams. They descended upon Wesley, who bravely fought them off for eight long years. Battered and bruised, cut and torn, Wesley had persevered. The blood of his enemies formed a mighty raging river. As he lay, recovering from his wounds he watched as the river pushed and forced itself against the diamond. "How mighty river... how if you with your primordial might, could not slide away such a gem as this... how could I, a mere mortal do so?"
He slept another eight days. When he awoke, he decided he would try to make it through the diamond wall. It took the force of a mighty river, the determination of the giant bear, the sturdiness of a powerful oxen, the stamina of a majestic eagle, the speed of a mighty woodpecker, the cleverness of a great spider, and the simplicity of a grasshopper to realize what he must do. With all of this, Wesley punched through the wall of diamond, and carried through the mountain.
The Chartreuse Prince was afraid. No mere mortal has ever proven to be this powerful. He knew he had but one last attempt to stop Wesley from ascending into godhood. The next day before Wesley lay a beautiful wall of fine gold and silver that stretched up to the top of the mountain. As he approached, The Chartreuse Prince appeared, but not hiding his form. His radiance did not sway Wesley away from his goal. The Chartreuse Prince spoke: "You have done well to come thus far, mortal. I have but one last trial for you." He motioned toward the wall "This wall is made up of all the gold and silver in the universe. It is yours, along with the immortality to enjoy it if only you turn back now." Wesley walked up to the prince, wordlessly. He looked upon the wall as he approached. How it did glitter and shine in the light of the gods. The light of the gods... That was what was valuable. He reared back his fist and punched into the wall. The soft metals bent and strained before his fist. A hole opened up in the wall - it lead to the stars. Wesley turned back to the prince with a smile on his face. He had done it. He had passed all eight trials. He turned again to the light pouring through the golden and silver gates...
And then proceed into the heavens.
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