School of Comparative Abominations

Among the many fine things that have come from the experimental labs division of The School of Comparative Abominations are these unusual experiments:

Nofunions - Onions that become ambulatory and appear to take delight in using their particular chemical makeup to make people cry. The infection is contagious to onions and leaks, and when they were introduced, an onion famine was effective for the next three years.
Galthor, Ruler of the Inner Realms of Talinos - Galthor was an experimental flesh golem that ascended to the rank of Arch Demon in three months. Fortunately, their plans of conquest entirely involved the darker planes where demons dwell and the Battle School was not called in to fight them. Their creator was given an 'A' and granted professorship.
Republicans
The Ague - This abomination is both deceptively and erroneously named. It was a condition involving the conversion of human flesh into a sort of self-willed slime that ate all in its path, growing as it did so. It started at the finger nails and proceeded up the arms and the rest of the body. The slime turned out to be unable to dissolve or consume glass, however. And a coincidentally timed experiment in the Trap Research and Development department quickly encased the SOCA building. The screams stopped after three days, and after a month, an investigation team found the slime had all tried up. SOCA was reopened the following semester.
"Fry Sauce"
Zatanna's Curse - Another infection, but an unconventional one. It is passed by hearing an infected person pronounce a spell. It causes the victim to mispronounce magic in perverse ways, generating an unintended effect, often reversing the target to the caster or causing an opposite effect to intended. At the very least, the effect is embarrassing. The victim is usually completely unaware they are saying their spells wrong, and rationalizes the observed effects as what they intended. The creator of this particularly abomination received an 'A' but was expelled from AUC after sneaking into the College of Magic and releasing it.