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N O T I C E : : m e m o r y _ s t r e a m _ l o c a t e d
I D : : G r o o m i n g
T Y P E: : R E C O L L E C T I V E
So like, the most unreasonable burden placed on women (and extra so for trans women) is having to shave. Shaving is fucking torture. Even if you only have to shave a really small area like your pubic mound or under your armpits, first of all you're gonna get razorburn, second of all, you probably have to go over it twice to get both the long and short hairs; so it takes way too long. Third and by far worst: Hair in most places grows back at the fucking speed of light, so you're only gonna actually look smooth for like a week
at most; realistically probably way less than that. And when it does grow back, you can't cut it again until it's gotten long enough, because the hairs grow unevenly and if you try and shave too early then you'll hit some but the razor will miss others and it'll end up looking messy and aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa- this shit is stupid
For that reason, some of the most basic shit in women's rights movements in the last century has been trying to do away with the expectation of women having to shave. This is a good goal and I fully support it; when I was born it was a lot more of a thing, and nowadays, at least in queer circles - I don't know how the straights are getting along - I hear about many more people who are comfortable not shaving. That's definitely a good thing and I hope it continues going in that direction.
Personally, I was lucky enough to get a lot of laser facial hair removal covered by the
Gliese's government, so my facial hair looks stubble-less when I shave it and doesn't really produce dysphoria any more. That's by far the most important part for me. As for elsewhere: I used to have tiny amounts of hair on my back and a fair bit on my ass, which was horrible and I hated it, but upping my HRT dose a few years ago seems to have gotten rid of all of that. I didn't actually notice until a couple months back, but it's a really nice thing to not have to think about any more. I sorta won the genetic lottery on leg and arm hair as well: Even pre-HRT I had less hair on my arms than a lot of cis women, and post-HRT the same is true of my legs as well; so those don't get me dysphoric at all any more.
The remaining areas that bother me are my armpits and around my groin. The former is... complicated. The hairs in both places have stopped growing nearly as long or as thick, so even if I go a couple of months without shaving, there's not much of a 'bush' in either location; more just a kind of ugly covering of hair. The thing that fucks with me is, like on all landamaeris in my opinion, it blends horribly with my markings and looks completely out of place against my skin. It's also.... not something I can think of as feminine, no matter how much I try, so the best I'm ever able to feel is ambivalent about it. With my armpits I usually end up just not shaving them, because like, I never go out anywhere or exist in any situation where anyone would see me shirtless; so I can kinda tell myself it just doesn't matter? But with my groin, it's like...
I know it's not going to happen. There is literally no chance of any situation occurring in which someone would see me naked, but the mere
thought of getting seen that way and having hair down there is... I can not cope with that. It would kill me. So, for that reason, I do shave there whenever it gets long enough that I can do so.
It's a pretty delusional thing to worry about, I know; if I was ever actually going to have sex, I would take the opportunity to shave all over- but somehow the thought of getting seen naked without having the opportunity to have shaved down there first is so horrifying that I have to keep it clear even though that has no possibility of happening. Being honest, the reason why is probably because I think having hair there makes me not look like a girl. Which, I know I just said all that stuff about 'women shouldn't have to shave to be considered feminine' but like... uegh. I'm doing the thing where I apply a standard to every person except myself. wueeeegggghhhhh
I guess this is what internalized transmisogyny brainrot does to you
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N O T I C E : : m e m o r y _ s t r e a m _ t e r m i n a t e d
