Excerpts from the Cooking Notebook of Ospher Spurshoe
Unlike his spell book, which is meticulously neat, easy to follow and sturdily bound, Ospher’s cooking notebook is a chaotic affair, filled with scribbles and random thoughts written into the margins. It is also in relatively poor condition. Ospher has, however, fireproofed both; kitchen hazards are a daily concern.
Peanut Butter Sauce
• 7 tbsps peanut butter
• 65 g softened butter
• 1 lime
• 1 tbsps nutmeg
• Sea salt and pepper to taste
• Optional: 1 Baradradian ghost pepper, chopped finely
• Southern spices to taste Squid • 6 cloves of garlic
• 3 tbsps olive oil
• 1 medium squid, tentacles removed and sectioned evenly. Don’t forget to save the ink for future dishes
• 2 limes Instructions 1. Mix, then whip together all the ingredients and half the butter for the peanut butter sauce, adjusting ingredients to taste as you please. Heat a pan and the remaining butter and pour in the concoction, cooking 3-4 minutes.
2. Mix together the garlic and oil. Clean the squid. Use a sharp knife to score a diamond pattern on the outside of each squid. Carefully scrape off the suckers if you wish, but that’s for the weak.
3. Brush the prepared squid with some garlic olive oil and season to taste. Place on a very hot barbecue or grill and quickly cook both sides until the squid is flecked with gold and no longer translucent.
4. Just before removing from the grill spread with some of the peanut butter sauce as evenly as possible, then serve with extra peanut butter and lime. Potential Gastromancy infusion: Absorb elements. The obvious answer might be to use the spell to then cast aqua based magic into the squid, but an alternative could be to have it absorb magical fire instead. The contrasting nature might force out even stronger flavor.
People often are taken aback by the appearance of mandrake root. It’s admittedly not for the faint of heart, but for this piece my family deserves all the credit in that an ancestor first came across the idea of collecting them for medicine. Turns out the off putting things are quite nutritious if prepared right.
Though the screams are enough to, at a minimum, deafen and at the worst, kill, there are a few tricks to collecting them by using some strong twine and a trained hawk while staying a very, very far distance away. Be sure to keep the heads! That’s where the best bits are.
• Mandrake (3 medium sized roots)
• 2 eggs
• Flour (150 g)
• Water
• Soy sauce (1 tbsp)
• White wine (1 tbsp)
• Salt to taste
• Ginger to taste
• 4 tomatoes
• 4 Carrots
• 8 radishes
• Olive oil Instructions 1. Prepare the mandrake roots by shaving large pieces from the roots. The heads and leaves can be treated as such.
2. Grate the ginger finely
3. Whip the eggs, flour and water together until thick in a large bowl
4. Coat the mandrake in the batter
5. Heat a pan and fry the mandrake in the oil until the batter is golden. Careful not to overcook, mandrake is notoriously easy to ruin
6. Pour in the wine halfway through, and salt and ginger.
7. Set the roots aside, and chop all vegetables
8. Toss together all ingredients in a large bowl with dressing of choice. A lighter one is recommended. Mixing in a dose of antivenom is recommended for first timers. Potential Gastromancy infusion: Hideous laughter. An old wives tale speaks of a how ill prepared mandrake in medicine can harm instead of help. Though I do not give too much credence to those stories, it’s possible that sonic type magic might revitalize mandrake that is either past its prime or strengthen its innate properties. A not so funny aftertaste is possible, though it’s worth pursuing.
• 3 tbs lime juice
• 2 lemons
• 1/2 cup vegetable oil
• 2 ginger roots
• 1 onion sliced thinly
• 1 tsp cumin
• 1 tsp coriander
• 1/4 cup chopped cilantro
• 2 tsp of starch
• 1 giant wasp, stinger and (optionally) wings and legs removed
• 3 cloves of garlic
• Salt to taste
• Frial spices to taste Instructions 1. To make the honey marinade, mix the honey, lime in a bowl. Add and mix with oil. Stir in ginger, onion, cumin, coriander, cilantro, and starch.
2. Remove the stinger carefully
3. Paint the wasp in liquid and wait 1 hour.
4. Heat a large oven until it is as hot as it can get.
5. Add 2 tablespoons oil to a pan and heat. When the oil is hot, add the garlic.
6. Cook briefly, then pour over the wasp.
7. Place the wasp into the oven adding 1-2 tablespoons of marinade over time.
8. Cook until the wasp begins to golden. Remove wasp and paint on marinade as needed
9. Can be used as an appetizer to a larger course. Potential Gastromancy Infusion: Inversion of Infestation. There’s no need to enhance the sweetness and delicacy of this dish. But such a large target is sure to attract its smaller cousins like flies to…that thing. If there was a way to reverse the spell to make it repellent to such, that would save a lot of headache.
• 6 bay leaves
• Frial spices to taste
• 2 garlic bulbs
• 6 onions, peeled and quartered
• 2 chilli peppers
• 1 1/2 teaspoons sea salt
• 16 sprigs fresh thyme
• Bunch of carnivorous plant leaves
• 1 pound of clams and mussels each
• 2 pounds of potatoes, unpeeled, halved
• 8 ears corn, shucked and broken in half
• 1/4 lb of wild mushrooms
• 2 pounds shrimp
• 1 giant centipede, legs removed, section and half shelled
• 2 lbs of wild board sausage
• Salt and pepper to taste Instructions 1. Remove legs and any other extraneous appendages from the centipede. Slice open vertically and section into several large segments.
2. Fill a large pot with water. Squeeze lemons into water and add rinds. Add bay leaves, seasoning, garlic, onions, chilies, 1 1/2 teaspoons of salt, and thyme.
3. Bring water to boil. Reduce heat, and simmer 10 minutes.
4. Add potatoes and simmer 12 minutes.
5. Add corn and mushrooms and simmer 5 minutes.
6. Add centipede segments, shrimp, clams, and mussels to the pot. Add whole sausages. Cover, and simmer until centipede is opaque and sausage is cooked through. Potential Gastromancy Infusion: Control water. I’ve always wanted to try controlling water movements and micromanaging the where and when and how much the water in a stew and soup interacts with the ingredients. Especially given the poisons in the centipede that could...maybe paralyze, this might help maybe? In a pinch, you can certainly make this and any other soup or stew dish prettier with this technique.
• 20 long strings (for binding leaves)
• 3 lbs of long grain sticky rice
• 5 Ibs of giant toad, cubed
• 10 salted egg yolks
• 40 small dried mushrooms
• 20 dried, shelled chestnuts
• 10 spring onions, chopped
• 3 dried radishes, chopped
• 7 oz raw, shelled peanuts (with skins)
• 1/2 cup soy sauce
• 1/4 cup of Balmoran wine
• Vegetable oil
• 5 cloves of garlic, roughly crushed
• 1 teaspoon black pepper
• 1-1/2 teaspoons sugar
• 2 star anise
• 1 teaspoon Frial spices
• 2 dried squish fruit, chopped Instructions 1. Prepare and cook ingredients
2. Soak rice in water for three hours, drain.
3. Stir-fry toad for a few minutes. Add chestnuts, soy sauce, wine, ground pepper, 1 teaspoon of sugar, star anise and spices, bring to a boil, cover and simmer for 1 hour. Remove toad and chestnuts from liquid and set aside.
4. Boil peanuts until tender (30 minutes to 1 hour).
5. Soak mushrooms until soft. Clean and trim stalks. Cut into 2 or 3 pieces. Stir-fry with a little liquid from stew.
6. Halve egg yolks.
7. Chop up dried radish finely and stir-fry with 1/2 teaspoon sugar and garlic.
8. Stir-fry spring onions.
9. To a large pan, add rice, peanuts, radish, spring onions, a little liquid from the stew mixture and 2 tablespoons of oil. Mix well.
10. Wrap dumplings
11. Soak vine leaves in warm water for 5 minutes to tenderize, before washing thoroughly in cold water
12. Wet strings to make them more pliable.
13. Add a small amount of rice mixture, compressing with a spoon.
14. Add 1 piece each of toad, chestnut, mushroom, egg yoke.
15. Add more rice until you have nearly a full pouch. Compress firmly with a spoon.
16. Fold leaves over the open top, then around to side until it is firmly wrapped. It should be pyramid shaped with sharp edges and pointed ends. Trim off any excess leaf with scissors.
17. Tie up dumplings tightly with a double knot.
18. Steam for 1 hour, unwrap and serve. Potential Gastromancy Infusion: Minor illusion. The minor illusion is to stabilize the psychedelic effect of the dish. Careful moderation is needed to ensure that the experience doesn’t overwhelm the diner.
• 1 red, yellow and green bell pepper each
• 1 habenero pepper
• 6 cloves of garlic
• 1 large onion
• Ground pepper
• Beef stock
• Ground squid and crayfish to taste
• Salt
• Cayenne pepper
• Olive oil
• Lemons. A lot of lemons. Instructions 1. Clean the snail meat by boiling them in a large pot for about 5 minutes. Drain the water and pull the snail out and place them in a bowl.
2. Squeeze in some lemon juice and let it sit for 5-10 minutes. Scrub the snail meat with lemon until the sliminess is gone. Rinse with plenty of cold water.
3. Add the snail to a pan with enough oil and sprinkle some salt. Fry the snail for roughly 10 minutes, stirring every few minutes.
4. Chop the vegetables - habanero pepper, bell peppers, and onions - and mince the garlic. In a pan or skillet, sauté onions and garlic in olive oil till fragrant.
5. Add the chopped peppers, bouillon, cayenne pepper, and ground crayfish and sauté for five more minutes.
6. Add the snail, cover the pan, and cook on medium-low heat for about 10 minutes. The pan must be covered so that the flavors and juices can sink into the snails.
7. About halfway through, taste for salt and spices and adjust if necessary.
8. Serve with cauliflower rice Potential Gastromancy Infusion: Color Spray. A slight adjustment of the spell can possibly generate only a little bit of blindness instead of full blown blindness, because you can never have a dish that’s too spicy. And anyone who says otherwise doesn’t know what they’re missing. Or they do, I’ve had people tell me that too. But I’m a fool for a lovely place setting, and trapping the watered down spell into the already colorful dish from the bell peppers could give the surface a sheen to mimic the frankly sweet looking shell the Flail Snail formerly inhabits.
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Fire Grilled Squid with Peanut Butter (serves 4)
My first seafood experience was squid. Honestly I really liked the idea of something so alien being so tasty. It isn’t particularly easy to procure as the coast is some distance so any that make it to the city goes through some preserving process, but nonetheless, it is worth all the dangers the Stormlanders present to get these tentacled treats. I’ve heard tales of larger kraken living in the deepest waters assailing ships from time to time, but no luck yet in getting any to cook. This is honestly a simple dish to make. Peanut butter makes a great sauce as it can be many different types of consistencies and still retain its overall aroma and slightly sweet, robust taste. I personally like jazzing it up with Baradradian spices to give it a really fiery taste.Peanut Butter Sauce
• 7 tbsps peanut butter
• 65 g softened butter
• 1 lime
• 1 tbsps nutmeg
• Sea salt and pepper to taste
• Optional: 1 Baradradian ghost pepper, chopped finely
• Southern spices to taste Squid • 6 cloves of garlic
• 3 tbsps olive oil
• 1 medium squid, tentacles removed and sectioned evenly. Don’t forget to save the ink for future dishes
• 2 limes Instructions 1. Mix, then whip together all the ingredients and half the butter for the peanut butter sauce, adjusting ingredients to taste as you please. Heat a pan and the remaining butter and pour in the concoction, cooking 3-4 minutes.
2. Mix together the garlic and oil. Clean the squid. Use a sharp knife to score a diamond pattern on the outside of each squid. Carefully scrape off the suckers if you wish, but that’s for the weak.
3. Brush the prepared squid with some garlic olive oil and season to taste. Place on a very hot barbecue or grill and quickly cook both sides until the squid is flecked with gold and no longer translucent.
4. Just before removing from the grill spread with some of the peanut butter sauce as evenly as possible, then serve with extra peanut butter and lime. Potential Gastromancy infusion: Absorb elements. The obvious answer might be to use the spell to then cast aqua based magic into the squid, but an alternative could be to have it absorb magical fire instead. The contrasting nature might force out even stronger flavor.
Fried Mandrake salad (serves 4)
• 2 eggs
• Flour (150 g)
• Water
• Soy sauce (1 tbsp)
• White wine (1 tbsp)
• Salt to taste
• Ginger to taste
• 4 tomatoes
• 4 Carrots
• 8 radishes
• Olive oil Instructions 1. Prepare the mandrake roots by shaving large pieces from the roots. The heads and leaves can be treated as such.
2. Grate the ginger finely
3. Whip the eggs, flour and water together until thick in a large bowl
4. Coat the mandrake in the batter
5. Heat a pan and fry the mandrake in the oil until the batter is golden. Careful not to overcook, mandrake is notoriously easy to ruin
6. Pour in the wine halfway through, and salt and ginger.
7. Set the roots aside, and chop all vegetables
8. Toss together all ingredients in a large bowl with dressing of choice. A lighter one is recommended. Mixing in a dose of antivenom is recommended for first timers. Potential Gastromancy infusion: Hideous laughter. An old wives tale speaks of a how ill prepared mandrake in medicine can harm instead of help. Though I do not give too much credence to those stories, it’s possible that sonic type magic might revitalize mandrake that is either past its prime or strengthen its innate properties. A not so funny aftertaste is possible, though it’s worth pursuing.
Honeyed Giant Wasp (Serves 10)
This one probably will end up being more of a centerpiece dish to attract by its appearance rather than for its nutritional value or ease of edibility. REGULAR sized honeyed wasps would be preferable but this did turn out to be quite the beauty. Removing its stinger was hell though. Don’t want anyone hurting themselves on it. These are apparently quite abundant in the swamp lands around Becklingberg, but hunting them can prove deadly, especially if you’re allergic to wasp stings or stab wounds in general. That said, who doesn’t like honeyed anything? Especially something like a wasp? They’re really damn crunchy. • Full jar of honey• 3 tbs lime juice
• 2 lemons
• 1/2 cup vegetable oil
• 2 ginger roots
• 1 onion sliced thinly
• 1 tsp cumin
• 1 tsp coriander
• 1/4 cup chopped cilantro
• 2 tsp of starch
• 1 giant wasp, stinger and (optionally) wings and legs removed
• 3 cloves of garlic
• Salt to taste
• Frial spices to taste Instructions 1. To make the honey marinade, mix the honey, lime in a bowl. Add and mix with oil. Stir in ginger, onion, cumin, coriander, cilantro, and starch.
2. Remove the stinger carefully
3. Paint the wasp in liquid and wait 1 hour.
4. Heat a large oven until it is as hot as it can get.
5. Add 2 tablespoons oil to a pan and heat. When the oil is hot, add the garlic.
6. Cook briefly, then pour over the wasp.
7. Place the wasp into the oven adding 1-2 tablespoons of marinade over time.
8. Cook until the wasp begins to golden. Remove wasp and paint on marinade as needed
9. Can be used as an appetizer to a larger course. Potential Gastromancy Infusion: Inversion of Infestation. There’s no need to enhance the sweetness and delicacy of this dish. But such a large target is sure to attract its smaller cousins like flies to…that thing. If there was a way to reverse the spell to make it repellent to such, that would save a lot of headache.
Giant Centipede Hot Pot (Serves 6)
For some reason most people have been very adverse to eating things found in sewers. It’s not like you don’t clean and purify any food you’re going to prepare in the first place. Or maybe it’s the multitude of legs. It’s definitely a nightmare to prepare. Either way, there were a good number of these beneath Wagner Abbey. Since you’re certainly not getting lobster at a heretofore unnamed establishment, I decided to best the “chef” at his own game and create this “seafood” like dish using these crawlies. De-legging the bastard is the most annoying part. Thankfully, magic. When you prepare them properly, the meat’s indistinguishable from most crustaceans. A bit spongy but I at least know what I’m doing. It’s actually lacking in flavor and we had gotten a generous shipment of elven grown produce at the time so it was a good opportunity to create a medley to give this some life. Throw in some giant carnivorous plant leaves and treating the ingredients with some of its acidic saliva to thicken the stew and you have something that is absolutely not actually appropriate for the summer days I was experimenting this in. • 4 lemons• 6 bay leaves
• Frial spices to taste
• 2 garlic bulbs
• 6 onions, peeled and quartered
• 2 chilli peppers
• 1 1/2 teaspoons sea salt
• 16 sprigs fresh thyme
• Bunch of carnivorous plant leaves
• 1 pound of clams and mussels each
• 2 pounds of potatoes, unpeeled, halved
• 8 ears corn, shucked and broken in half
• 1/4 lb of wild mushrooms
• 2 pounds shrimp
• 1 giant centipede, legs removed, section and half shelled
• 2 lbs of wild board sausage
• Salt and pepper to taste Instructions 1. Remove legs and any other extraneous appendages from the centipede. Slice open vertically and section into several large segments.
2. Fill a large pot with water. Squeeze lemons into water and add rinds. Add bay leaves, seasoning, garlic, onions, chilies, 1 1/2 teaspoons of salt, and thyme.
3. Bring water to boil. Reduce heat, and simmer 10 minutes.
4. Add potatoes and simmer 12 minutes.
5. Add corn and mushrooms and simmer 5 minutes.
6. Add centipede segments, shrimp, clams, and mussels to the pot. Add whole sausages. Cover, and simmer until centipede is opaque and sausage is cooked through. Potential Gastromancy Infusion: Control water. I’ve always wanted to try controlling water movements and micromanaging the where and when and how much the water in a stew and soup interacts with the ingredients. Especially given the poisons in the centipede that could...maybe paralyze, this might help maybe? In a pinch, you can certainly make this and any other soup or stew dish prettier with this technique.
Rice and Giant Toad dumplings wrapped in yellow musk vines (makes 20)
Though the Giant Toad in my initial run of this recipe was thrall to Ilsemine, the dangerous creatures are aplenty in what we’ve been told is Toad Season. They’re large enough to hunt and devour wolves, so hunting them is not exactly the safest occupation, but fortunately, brining one down is enough to last for quite a while. They are quite tasty and can be prepared any number of ways. Question. Could they be prepared with the wolves they devoured still available to act as a stuffing? A challenge! I decided to use this opportunity, however, to see what would happen when, given the purported psychedelic effects of the Giant Toad’s secretions on its skin, were steamed together with the psychedelic effects of the deadly yellow musk vines we encountered in the Abbey. Fortunately, they were young yet, as fully grown vines are exceptionally dangerous and the mind altering effects that much more awesome. Not that I would know anything about that. As it turns out, the steaming process removes a great deal of the chemicals that would be the cause of the...mind influence but the combination of the residual remains from cooking them together produces some rather interesting experiences. Oh and the food is really good too. Shame there isn’t an easy way to get these vines. Ingredients • 40 large dried yellow musk vine leaves (2 for each)• 20 long strings (for binding leaves)
• 3 lbs of long grain sticky rice
• 5 Ibs of giant toad, cubed
• 10 salted egg yolks
• 40 small dried mushrooms
• 20 dried, shelled chestnuts
• 10 spring onions, chopped
• 3 dried radishes, chopped
• 7 oz raw, shelled peanuts (with skins)
• 1/2 cup soy sauce
• 1/4 cup of Balmoran wine
• Vegetable oil
• 5 cloves of garlic, roughly crushed
• 1 teaspoon black pepper
• 1-1/2 teaspoons sugar
• 2 star anise
• 1 teaspoon Frial spices
• 2 dried squish fruit, chopped Instructions 1. Prepare and cook ingredients
2. Soak rice in water for three hours, drain.
3. Stir-fry toad for a few minutes. Add chestnuts, soy sauce, wine, ground pepper, 1 teaspoon of sugar, star anise and spices, bring to a boil, cover and simmer for 1 hour. Remove toad and chestnuts from liquid and set aside.
4. Boil peanuts until tender (30 minutes to 1 hour).
5. Soak mushrooms until soft. Clean and trim stalks. Cut into 2 or 3 pieces. Stir-fry with a little liquid from stew.
6. Halve egg yolks.
7. Chop up dried radish finely and stir-fry with 1/2 teaspoon sugar and garlic.
8. Stir-fry spring onions.
9. To a large pan, add rice, peanuts, radish, spring onions, a little liquid from the stew mixture and 2 tablespoons of oil. Mix well.
10. Wrap dumplings
11. Soak vine leaves in warm water for 5 minutes to tenderize, before washing thoroughly in cold water
12. Wet strings to make them more pliable.
13. Add a small amount of rice mixture, compressing with a spoon.
14. Add 1 piece each of toad, chestnut, mushroom, egg yoke.
15. Add more rice until you have nearly a full pouch. Compress firmly with a spoon.
16. Fold leaves over the open top, then around to side until it is firmly wrapped. It should be pyramid shaped with sharp edges and pointed ends. Trim off any excess leaf with scissors.
17. Tie up dumplings tightly with a double knot.
18. Steam for 1 hour, unwrap and serve. Potential Gastromancy Infusion: Minor illusion. The minor illusion is to stabilize the psychedelic effect of the dish. Careful moderation is needed to ensure that the experience doesn’t overwhelm the diner.
Peppered Flail Snail (Serves 4)
I love snails. One of the more decadent dishes I’ve come across that is loaded in butter and perfect for snacking on. And, of course, snails were never in short supply even during the famine. However, flail snail is a horse, so to speak, of a different color. Certainly the enormity by comparison to its tiny cousins and its beautiful shell alone made me wonder if there was any difference to how I could approach it. Turns out, no! I decided to make it as colorful as possible to match the brilliant shell. As far as how it tastes, there is a heaviness to it that allows it to soak in even more flavor from the ingredients. Did I mention how big this thing was? I think it almost killed one of King Nemo’s men with its tentacle flails, and could repel magic with its shell. Not the most dangerous thing we’ve hunted but it may be easier to stick with escargot. Ingredients • 3 lbs. of Flail Snail meat, properly sliced into wavy pieces• 1 red, yellow and green bell pepper each
• 1 habenero pepper
• 6 cloves of garlic
• 1 large onion
• Ground pepper
• Beef stock
• Ground squid and crayfish to taste
• Salt
• Cayenne pepper
• Olive oil
• Lemons. A lot of lemons. Instructions 1. Clean the snail meat by boiling them in a large pot for about 5 minutes. Drain the water and pull the snail out and place them in a bowl.
2. Squeeze in some lemon juice and let it sit for 5-10 minutes. Scrub the snail meat with lemon until the sliminess is gone. Rinse with plenty of cold water.
3. Add the snail to a pan with enough oil and sprinkle some salt. Fry the snail for roughly 10 minutes, stirring every few minutes.
4. Chop the vegetables - habanero pepper, bell peppers, and onions - and mince the garlic. In a pan or skillet, sauté onions and garlic in olive oil till fragrant.
5. Add the chopped peppers, bouillon, cayenne pepper, and ground crayfish and sauté for five more minutes.
6. Add the snail, cover the pan, and cook on medium-low heat for about 10 minutes. The pan must be covered so that the flavors and juices can sink into the snails.
7. About halfway through, taste for salt and spices and adjust if necessary.
8. Serve with cauliflower rice Potential Gastromancy Infusion: Color Spray. A slight adjustment of the spell can possibly generate only a little bit of blindness instead of full blown blindness, because you can never have a dish that’s too spicy. And anyone who says otherwise doesn’t know what they’re missing. Or they do, I’ve had people tell me that too. But I’m a fool for a lovely place setting, and trapping the watered down spell into the already colorful dish from the bell peppers could give the surface a sheen to mimic the frankly sweet looking shell the Flail Snail formerly inhabits.
