General Summary
bash$ cd "\Documents\Stuff\My Stuff\Fanfiction\" bash$ cat "Uncle Ah kow and the Beanstalk.txt"
Disclaimer: This work is entirely fictional and any resemblance to real life events and people is completely coincidental.A long long ago, there were five thieves looking for their next meal ticket. Null, the youngest, stumbled upon his words, but was nimble with his code. Barbie, was similar, though she was a more seasoned thief with some way of street smarts. Next was 8Bit, the surgeon and occasional muscle of the group. These craftspeople were joined by two silver of tongue, Ms. Gardener, and Uncle Ah kow himself. They had gotten word someone was interested in their services, and met a mysterious woman on the deck of a luxurious cruise. "This job must really pay well, considering they'd bring us here to deal", said Ms. Gardener. The mysterious woman explained to the band of thieves that they were to recover a package promised to them which never arrived. The courier in question, was known to the woman only by "Shiokolatte." Unfortunately, 8Bit was not feeling very outwardly confident during the negotiations, and the mysterious woman did not believe in the bandits' abilities and offered them half their usual rate. She did not expect them to succeed. Also she made them sign a bunch of NDAs never to speak or keep any written documents about this job. Said she would shoot anyone dead if her payroll cops found any of them responsible for leaving a papertrail. I think she's crazy, of course we aren't that dumb... After various hacking activities by Null and Barbie, and gossip gathering by Ms. Gardener and Uncle Ah kow, the bandits found that Shiokolatte's had planned a party in New Atlantis. The package they were supposed to retrieve was some kind of virtual reality device from Disney-Amazon. The bandits took Ms. Gardener's boat to New Atlantis, and found the building was inaccessible - except by climbing beanstalks hanging from the building's walls. Uncle Ah kow though, had other plans and attempted to be a scrap collector "karan guni man". Ms. Gardener tried to talk to the residents by going door to door, sadly to no avail. Suddenly 8Bit had the bright idea to yell "free food!" to convince an old woman to answer her door. Unfortunately that didn’t work either, instead an old man with bloody, empty eye sockets appeared and attacked Ms Gardener and 8Bit in search of the free food. The old man wasn’t making sense, saying that "the others were everywhere", and refused to talk about Shiokolatte or the party. He did say that his eyes were his own fault, said he had seen too much. Barbie tried to locate any stray wifi signals in the building, and found there was something strange being transmitted. Since the old man left his door open, Barbie and Null decided to find a way to hack into the wifi. They ended up playing a demo of The Others, and finding that the package they were looking for was on the 20th floor. Meanwhile 8Bit, G, and Ah kow went upstairs to explore, only stopping in a courtyard where they were attacked by 3 local militia and two crazy residents -- one with a harpoon and one with a chain! 8Bit shot the militiamen, while Ah kow talked his way into becoming a prisoner rather than a dead body. The man with the chain held Ms. Gardener in a chokehold, and attempted to push her over the balcony. However he couldn’t hold the chain to her neck while restraining her arms at the same time, so she took out a taser, and pushed him over the balcony instead, before rescuing Uncle Ah kow from the other assailant. Barbie and Null had found the location of the briefcase, but were feeling "strange" after their hacking trip. It was as if plugging in had installed something on their cyberware which was interfering with their vision. They were seeing copies of objects in the room, black stuff pouring from broken TVs. Luckily they were both hackers and could operate on each other's cyberware to fix their systems. Eventually the entire team made it to the 20th floor, which was a greenhouse in a circular chamber. Ms. Gardener wasn’t a real gardener, but she moved freely through the plants in her brand new chameleon stealth suit. She walked till an open clearing emerged, and as she peered right the briefcase was open and connected with wires running everywhere. Unfortunately, obscuring the view was a giant goose with grey feathers and red eyes, which almost made it look cybernetic than organic. Ms. Gardener cowardly turned back -- she wasn’t going to go duck hunting alone. Upon conferring with the others, it was agreed 8Bit and Ms Gardener would go on a "wild goose chase" while the two hackers and Uncle Ah kow removed and retrieved the package. 8Bit stumbled into the clearing to find no geese in sight, "Gardener, maybe you've been hacked too like Null and Barbie?" Till suddenly two geese erupted from the bushes either side of him. Ms Gardener tried to shoot the geese, but she wasn’t a very good shot, and eventually they turned on her. They bruised her head, and she tried to blind them by setting the chameleon suit to the highest brightness setting, but those red eyes were clearly not organic. Meanwhile Barbie managed to disengage the package from the wires and cooling mechanism, when the dome of the greenhouse suddenly shattered and ropes trickled downwards. What looked to be a soldier wearing modern body armor shaped as samurai plating appeared, and swung his katana to slice at Null and Barbie's backs, with Barbie almost dropping the goods. However, Ms Gardener had seen these samurai attack her teammates in the corner of her eye, and took out her phone to play a really annoying ringtone ("Final Countdown" by Europe) and threw it in the direction of the samurai and played dead. Null and Barbie, who had prior knowledge of the guard geese, ran as fast as they could, while the geese leapt at the samurai and attacked him. Barbie was so relieved she tried to assist the geese by kicking at the samurai, though he was too heavily armored to tell if it had any effect. The thieves escaped with their lives and actually received a bonus for retrieving the hardware instead of just the software inside.
Missions/Quests Completed
Operation Goose Chase (Employer: unknown)
- Paid in Full
- Learnt something new
- Not a set-up
Operation Goose Chase
Uncle Ah Wah
The Plumber
BYTE
Doll
Zero
Report Date
15 Oct 2018
Primary Location
The Plumber
Schemes
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