Sam

Sam hated everybody. Everybody sucked. They were all assholes. He hated each and every person on Earth, including the millions he’d never even met. He hated everyone except for the redheaded girl that sat in front of him in Lit class.

He loved her.

One day, Sam nervously decided to profess his love to the redheaded girl. He went up to her before class and decided to ask her out for a date on Saturday. She looked at him in shock and said, with every ounce of excitement in her, “YES! YES! I’ve been waiting all year for this.”

So, Sam and the redheaded girl went out and they kept going out for several months. Sam became a much happier camper and threw away his twenty-seven pairs of black jeans.

And, after seven months with the redheaded girl, Sam loved everybody. Everybody was great. He loved each and every person on Earth, including the millions he’d never even met. He loved everybody, except for the little redheaded girl.

He hated her now.