Spring 4989, 10 Kuromoth
As Shon requested, Lily stayed at Hamerfoss to greet Thom and Rerves the following morning. She would explain his absence, but Shon didn't want to think about that as he rode his borrowed mare south with Smith Nangran. Back towards Smildna.
Ryuuko flew beside him, and he found himself reliving the vigil once again. He shook his head and tried to focus instead on replaying his short conversation with Lily.
She hadn't said she was sorry... She'd said, 'It'll be okay.' It WILL be okay. Not 'it is okay.' With only three words, she'd not only acknowledged his pain but tried to assure him that it would be a temporary suffering. She'd held him silently as he cried. Showing him that she would be there for him through it all. If he would have her. When all anyone else could say was 'I'm sorry.'
They road through the night and into the dawn in silence while Shon tried not to let his mind stray to what Rerves and Thom, his closest friends, were doing. Glowing with divine love and bone-deep contentment. Would they grieve for him? Would they, too, say 'I'm sorry'? If he ever saw them again?
The mare began to puff, lather forming around her bit, and Nangran grunted. A silent cue that they should stop. Shon reigned her in, letting her walk for a while before pulling off the forest path at the next available camping spot. Ryuuko landed lightly on his shoulder as he dismounted, sighing wearily but without its usual chittering complaints. Hobbling the horse and letting her graze and doze, Shon leaned heavily against a tree and let himself slide to the ground. Exhausted but head still spinning.
He had told the Major General that he still intended to serve the Temple. Now that he had a few hours behind him and a few layers of figurative ice trapping his emotions and clearing his head again, he realized that it wasn't only what duty demanded of him. It was his only option.
The Temple vouching for him was the only reason Shon was allowed a sealing item. Without that, he would have to train with the Mages Guild, and there was no way he could afford it. That would force him to get a tattoo which would shorten his life and affect his health. And though the thought of dying early was more a comfort than a deterrent, it would also make him a less effective tool for his oath.
Shon drew his sword and let his eyes trail from its steal tip all the way to the pommel, which swirled in shades of midnight streaked with white. He remembered all the Sorcerer Paladins his friends had found for him in the records, but had to wonder again if this was why he'd been denied.
Ryuuko crawled down from his shoulder into his lap with a little whine-like whistle, and Shon resheathed the sword. No... there really was no other option, he had to enlist. Maybe he could request a station far away from Smilnda. Shon's only travel would be to patrol the surrounding roads, but he would at least get a steady paycheck. Maybe Master Veon-Zih would still be able to visit once a year...
Shon leaned his head back on the rough tree bark and tried to find sleep. Praying for a dreamless rest.
***
They rode hard the rest of the day and reached Smilnda as the sun was dipping below its great walls. Shon dismounted and presented his papers to the gate guard. Thicker now -with the results and experiences of his training filled within.
The man yawned, scanning them, then looked at Shon's sword when he reached Shon's status as a Sorcerer. After humming for a moment, the guard marked Shon's entry in his log and handed back the papers. Leaving Shon and Nangran to lead the tired horses through the city, bustling with Spring Equinox celebrations, towards the Temple.
Shon saluted to the Paladins guarding the Temple and Nangran explained, "He's to see General Rasnah,"
They didn't question it, nodding at the explanation as though he'd been expected. Stablehands met them at the entrance and took the mare. Shon attempted to assist in her care as he had been taught, but they shooed him away. Leaving him nowhere to go but the General's office. Only then did Nangran leave him, though Shon still wasn't allowed to be alone.
He was escorted by a senior Paladin. Shon was managing to keep himself purposefully numb, but as he reached the end of the hall and saw the young knight standing guard outside Sir Rasnah's door, he nearly faltered.
Kefir blinked at Shon, then whispered, "What are you doing here? Isn't it early?" Would this be his life now? Running into old friends who'd succeeded where he'd failed at every turn?
Shon said nothing, and the young man's look of concern deepened. Shon's escort cleared his throat, pointedly nodding at the door until Kefir jumped to attention. Saluting the superior officer, Sir Kefir knocked on the General's door, waiting until the muffled call of "Enter" came, then held it open for Shon.
He was allowed to enter alone, the door closing behind him with a click of finality. Sir Rasnah looked up from her desk and cocked an impressive eyebrow at Shon, who saluted, trying to find the words to explain.
He needn't have bothered, she squeezed her eyes shut and mouthed a prayer, standing, she said, "At ease, Squ... Shon." She corrected softly. Shon took the official at-ease stance, his back still straight and hands firmly behind his back. Rasnah first looked towards her own private altar then rounded the desk to stand before him.
"I'm sorry." She stated, and Shon twitched. She didn't seem to notice, explaining, "Sir Selibra contacted me through the whispering stone. He says you still intend to serve the Temple. Are you sure that's what you want?"
"Sir," Shon answered shortly, "I swore an oath,"
She sighed, looking him over again, asking slowly, "And I suppose being an ally won't be enough to fulfill that vow, will it?"
Shon held his head a fraction higher, "As an ally, I would need a sealing tattoo. Receiving one would hinder my service to the Temple."
He watched her eyes shift to the sword over his shoulder but didn't look himself to see what color the pommel had turned. Ryuuko whistled its agreement with its human, though the sound was as subdued as the typically boisterous dragon had been since the vigil.
Rasnah nodded, "Enlisted it is then." she rounded her desk and, pulling out a drawer, shifted through the carefully organized papers there. As she pulled out two, she spoke again, "Sir Selibra also stated that you were the best Squire he'd ever trained, and Master Daunas reported as much multiple times. And what's more, your choice displays not only your loyalty to the Temple but your resolve as well. As such, I believe you may be a perfect candidate to enlist at the kingdom level..."
She looked up to gauge Shon's reaction but was met with only a curiously arched eyebrow. Something in the look made her smile, only half of her mouth tilting up in a crooked grin. She slid one of the two papers his way, explaining further, "As a kingdom enlisted, you would serve not only the Temple in Clearhelm but all the Hengist Temples in every province, giving you clearance to travel between them. Though the Horsa provinces..." she spoke the god's name like a curse, "may still give you trouble, it will be less than..." She trailed off, but Shon knew what she would have said. They would give an enlisted less trouble than a Paladin or Cleric.
Rasnah stood again. She was nearly the same height as Shon, yet she seemed to tower over him with the weight of her experience and regal bearing, "You will receive a monthly stipend and have access to almost all Temple utilities. A warm bed in the barracks, showers or baths where possible, and two meals a day in the mess wherever you are. What you won't have is the ability to refuse jobs. No matter where or when they might send you."
Shon nodded in understanding but otherwise remained impassive. He hadn't known it was an option and didn't know how he was supposed to feel about having a new decision to make. Her face and voice softened, showing the woman beneath the General as she said, "Master Veon-Zih is an ally of the highest standing... He will want to travel with you, where ever you go..." And Shon made his decision.
***
