An Axe +2 Grind by T Van Santana | World Anvil Manuscripts | World Anvil
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Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3

In the world of Azza-Jono

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Chapter 3

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“Is there really no way out?” Emmaxuelle asked. Because if there were a way, they sure couldn’t find it.

“Stand back, you knaves,” Royerton said. “It requires a keen and knightly eye to find such a fine mechanism.”

Bronson rolled his eyes so hard his head moved along with them. “Pardon me, lady sir knight, but your Order knows not of the art of locks, mechanisms, and such. Those skills are within the purview of my training with the College of Physical Liberation.”

Wild Bill kept his head on his hand, itself resting on his ax haft. “Ya mean the Thieves Guild, yeah?”

“Precisely,” Bronson smirked.

Royerton ignored them and pressed against the nothing, her mailed fingers searching for something, anything to manipulate.

The nothing here was just that: nothing. Not a blackness, just a blank space, all around. The only other things on the scene—aside from the Band of Brutal Beneficence themselves—were two corpses. Two corpses recently killed by the Band of Brutal Beneficence.

Sagely took a puff on a loose cigarette, then handed it to Spells. The two laughed as the exchanged occurred.

“What’s that?” Emmaxuelle asked.

“Plus two cheeba of slowing,” Spells said.

She and Sagely giggled.

Emmaxuelle blinked.

“You should try it, Maxy,” Sagely said.

Emmaxuelle looked to the others for guidance.

Wild Bill shrugged.

Bronson smiled.

Royerton remained focused on trying to work the blankness.

“What do you think, Roy?” Emmaxuelle asked.

“Partake not of the devil weed,” Royerton said. “Why wouldst thou trade speed and the possibility of an extra attack for the simple pleasures of mild euphoria and an alteration of space-time?”

“That’s exactly why,” Wild Bill said.

But Royerton had nothing else to say about it. “This confounded blankness confounds me.”

“As I knew it would … “ Bronson stepped in, removing his priestly gloves. “Allow the experienced touch of a physical liberator to do the trick.”

Royerton rolled her eyes so hard her head moved with them. “Fine! I wash my knightly hands of it!”

Spells came alongside Emmaxuelle and put her arm around them. “Go on, gurl. Give it a little puff.”

“Wait, I thought we agreed she was a man,” Royerton said.

“Nope,” Wild Bill said.

“But I was certain …” Royerton said.

“Yeah, ya were,” Will Bill said. “No one else is.”

Emmaxuelle was okay with talking about it. “The thing about that is …”

“Oh c’mon!” Sagely cried out. “Take your hit already!”

Emmaxuelle raised their eyebrows, nodded, and took the loose cigarette. They looked to Spells for approval as they brought it close to their lips. “Like this?”

Spells smiled and nodded.

Emmaxuelle toked it, then immediately coughed.

Spells rubbed their back. “Yeah, there ya go. Good one, Elle.”

“Wait,” Sagely said, “I thought we’re calling her Maxy …”

“You are,” Wild Bill said.

“I’m fine with either,” Emmaxuelle said.

Sagely stared, unsure of what he’d been saying or doing.

“Go on, gurl,” Spells said. “Take another one.”

“Hey!” Sagely cried out. “It’s my hit!”

“Shut it, you twat!” Spells said.

“But it’s my stuff …” Sagely said.

“Tis not,” Royerton corrected. “It’s from the groups coffers and is therefore communal property of the group. True, we divvy said property after every third encounter or so, but we have not since … oh when was it last?”

“The Lizard King,” Wild Bill said.

Bronson paused from his examination of the nothing, raised a solitary finger, and said, “Actually, it was the Tribulations of The Quanderfolk. The Lizard King was four times ago, which was when you gained the jewel of quickening crust for you ax, Wild Bill, and when Spells found an ancient tome containing the legionnaire’s grimoire and the husk druid’s seven lost orisons …”

Wild Bill nodded. “That’s right. He’s right. My bad. Lost count.”

Bronson looked satisfied, but not enough to not continue: “… Emmaxuelle displayed her fine prowess with a blade while riding on the back of the lion she summoned to fight against the Quanderfolk’s legendary vizier, the White Lion of Yesteryear …”

Royerton raised a gloved finger. “Yes, but I must insist that she is a he …”

“As you wish, lady sir,” Bronson said. “But the fact remains the divvy was after the Tribulations and not the Lizard King.”

Wild Bill nodded again, then threw a thumb in Bronson’s direction. “He’s right. I remember now.”

Bronson gave a self-assured smile.

Sagely blinked. “But it’s my weed!”

Royerton took a step toward Sagely then pointed an accusatory finger. “Have you heard not of what we’ve been conversing?”

“No,” Sagely says sheepishly.

“I think I’m starting to feel something …” Emmaxuelle said.

Spells giggled and nodded.

“That’s wonderful, m’dear,” Royerton said to Emmaxuelle. She returned to Sagely, “I’ll say it again in terms that your common ears can understand. It’s group dro.”

Sagely sank. “Aw, man …”

Emmaxuelle giggled.

Bronson put a finger to his chin.

Royerton gave a lofty smile. “Can’t figure it yet, eh, master thief?”

Bronson’s irritation showed. “I’ve never said I was a master. I am but a skilled journeyman. I have pre-trained for the traps portion of the master test but not yet the locks.”

“Indeed,” Royerton beamed.

“This may be a stupid question,” Emmaxuelle said.

“Yes?” Royerton responded.

“But is my head growing fuzz on it? I feel like it’s growing fuzz on it.” They broke into laughter and leaned into Spells.

“You gonna go to some magical places tonight, gurl, what!” Spells said.

“Can I have my effing hit please?” Sagely said.

Everyone ignored him.

“Perhaps there is a dimensionally anchored tumbler system that is also wrapped in an invisibility rune …” Bronson hypothesized.

“Wake me up when something happens,” Wild Bill said, then closed his eyes.

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